


Red Bull Gives You Wiiiiings

by HeathVanilla



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Animal Abilities, Animal Instincts, Bird/Human Hybrids, But mostly angst, But they might be included briefly, F/M, Felix might kill someone so..., Fluff and Angst, Graphic Violence, Human Experimentation, Hybrids, I cant believe I forgot to add, I love them so much, JYP is a Jerk, Kidnapping, Lee Felix (Stray Kids)-centric, Like, M/M, Mad Scientists, My children are in this fic, No other idol groups will join, Non-Graphic Violence, Poor Bang Chan Is Just Too Sweet For This World, Rose and Kyuho, Slow Burn, So Little Time, Stray Kids are Worried, They just wont be main characters, Too many idols, and, i changed my mind, very slow burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-01-06
Updated: 2021-02-23
Packaged: 2021-02-27 14:34:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 15
Words: 66,623
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22138657
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HeathVanilla/pseuds/HeathVanilla
Summary: It seemed like only a couple weeks ago that Stray Kids finally debuted as eight. With two comebacks and four albums already under their belt, the boys are looking forward to exploring just how far their music can take them. However, everything changes late one night, when Lee Felix is kidnapped on his way back from the studio. The remaining members push their careers to the side as they focus on finding their lost brother. Meanwhile, Felix awakes to find himself trapped in a strange facility with a mad scientist who believes he can alter a human’s biological composition. What follows is a terrifying race against time as the boys try to track down their brother before the insane doctor’s experiments take a lethal turn.Or, Felix is kidnapped and taken to the crazy Dr. Hess who enjoys creating animal-human hybrids in his spare time while the rest of the members lose their everloving mind.
Relationships: Bang Yedam/Yang Jeongin | I.N, Han Jisung | Han/Lee Minho | Lee Know, Hwang Hyunjin/Kim Seungmin, Lee Felix/Seo Changbin, Original Female Character/Original Male Character
Comments: 148
Kudos: 373





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I'm really excited for this fic so I hope you enjoy!!! Pls read the end notes!!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The nightmare begins...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm really excited for this fic so I hope you enjoy!!! Pls read the end notes!!

**New Group Stray Kids On the Rise**  
The newest boy group under JYP Entertainment debuted March 25th, 2018 with their album “I Am Not.” Since then, the eight boys, ranging from ‘01 to ‘97 liners, have only grown in popularity. They’re racking in the awards and expanding their fanbase with their most recent album titled “I am You.”  
_November 14th, 2018_

* * *

“There is literally no way you can convince me to eat that.”

“Oh come on. It’s not going to kill you.”

“I don’t know. It smells like it could.”

“Stop being dramatic, Felix. I followed the recipe perfectly.”

Felix raised an eyebrow, disbelief evident on his face.

Chan sighed and lowered the pot of food, giving his arms a break. He pouted like a child, and Felix had a hard time taking him seriously with his pink apron and polka-dot oven mitts.

“I’ll try it later,” the younger sighed. He brushed his strawberry blonde hair out of his eyes and smiled. “I’ll be super hungry when I get back.”

“Where you going?” Jisung piped up from behind the fridge door. He slammed it shut and nearly dropped the tower of containers he was trying to balance in one hand. Felix rolled his eyes with a laugh, stepping around Chan in order to help his friend set the food down on the counter.

“I wanted to practice the choreo a little more. I’ll probably be gone a few hours.”

Chan brushed by with the pot held over his head. He almost dropped it back onto the stove but caught it at the last moment, sending a sheepish smile over his shoulder. He took off his mitts and frowned.

“I thought you had it down. The choreographer said you looked good earlier today.”

Felix shrugged and crossed his arms. Beside him, Jisung hopped up to sit on the counter, the carton of blueberries in his lap.

“I just want it to be perfect. _One less thing JYP can get on my ass about._ ”

The blonde mumbled the last part in english, hoping Jisung wouldn’t understand. Chan did, however, and his gaze softened. He took a deep breath.

“Okay. Just be back before one. You really shouldn’t be out this late, but as long as you’re careful you should be fine.”

Jisung squawked in protest, exposing the chewed blueberries tucked into his cheeks. Felix grimaced and used a hand to shut the boy’s mouth. He might look like a squirrel when he ate, but his manners were way worse than those of the tiny bushy-tailed mammals.

“ _Hyung!_ You never let me go out this late!” Squirrel boy huffed. Chan rolled his eyes.

“Felix is more responsible. I can trust him to go straight to the JYP building and back. You, on the other hand, would take a detour through a nightclub … ‘by accident.’”

Jisung opened his mouth to defend himself only to snap it shut a moment later. He pouted, evidently failing to think of a good comeback.

“Alright,” Felix chuckled, the low sound originating from deep in his throat. “Well I’m gonna go. I promise I’ll be back by---” a quick glance at the clock on the wall told him it was almost 9:45 pm. “---11:30? Maybe midnight. Is that okay Hyung?”

Chan nodded and waved him off, already turning around to stir whatever was in the pot. “Don’t wear yourself out.”

“Don’t do something I wouldn’t do!” Jisung grinned, shooting Felix a quick finger heart.

“Don’t do something Jisung _would_ do is better advice in my opinion,” Hyunjin shouted from where he was relaxing on the couch. Apparently he had heard their entire conversation and only just now decided to speak up.

Seungmin grunted in agreement, his head sitting comfortably in Hyunjin’s lap. Jeongin was laying on the floor at their feet, and his laughter could be heard throughout the dorms.

Jisung started shrieking something about betrayal and disloyalty, but everyone completely ignored him. So, he resorted to chucking blueberries at his friends.

It took all of ten seconds for the dorms to be ravaged by a food war, with the blueberries being accompanied by strawberries and raspberries and Chan joining the fight on Jisung’s side. The boys in the living room area propped up several large pillows and cushions in an attempt to block the projectile fruit, and Jeongin was army crawling across the floor to pick up any stray berries so they could return fire. Minho appeared out of nowhere, bringing a couple blankets from his room to set up in the kitchen as shields. The urge to pelt his friends with fruit was tempting, but Felix couldn’t join the fight; he had to leave. The blonde boy could only hope Changbin would take his place and grace the kitchen warriors with his help in the war.

Felix snuck away from the battle and towards the front door. He found a pair of worn sneakers and a comfortable jacket---which probably wasn’t his---and slipped them on. He opened the door and stepped outside, shouting a quick goodbye over his shoulder.

The boys still inside paused their food war long enough to return his farewell with vigor, shouting it loud enough to wake the whole block. Felix’s laugh was cut off as the door swung shut.

Jisung broke the temporary truce with a dramatic screech as he catapulted a dollop of yoghurt across the room. It landed with a splat on Seungmin’s forehead.

“You heathen,” Seungmin gasped.

And just like that, the battle continued.

Changbin walked into the kitchen a few minutes later, innocently looking for a quick snack. Instead, he was yanked behind a blanket by Chan. The Australian boy shoved a spoon and a bottle of ketchup into his hands.

“Fight for your life kid. It’s the only way we’ll get back to our families.”

Changbin looked down at the ketchup in his hand. At this point, he knew better than to question his bandmates. It usually only resulted in more confusion.

So, the raven haired man sighed as he squirted some of the red condiment into his spoon. He flicked it over the blanket without looking. A dolphin scream sounded out from somewhere in the living area, and Jisung patted Changbin’s shoulder.

“Way to go, Private!”

Changbin closed his eyes and sighed through his nose.

“I hate all of you.”

▀▄▀▄▀▄▀▄▀▄▀▄▀

An hour and a half passed quicker than Felix realized, and soon it was 11:30. The blonde idol gathered his things, making sure to turn all of the studio lights off before shutting the door behind him. The walk back to the dorms was only ten minutes long, and there was a nice breeze that would feel great on Felix’s sweaty skin.

Chan was known to get worried easier and more often than normal people, and Felix was definitely aware of this. He decided he would reassure the older Australian native before he even had a chance to get concerned, sending a quick text informing him that he had just left the building.

The blonde placed his phone in his coat pocket and began his walk home.

Life as an idol was all that Felix had hoped it would be: adoring fans, incredible on-stage performances, songs that he helped write playing on popular radio stations, and so much more. He felt so lucky to be where he was, laden with hundreds of exciting opportunities to get their name out there. The world had only seen a fraction of what Stray Kids had to offer, and all of the members were excited to turn that potential into reality. Together, they wanted to make an impact on the k-pop industry. They wanted to become as well-known and influential as groups such as BTS, EXO, SHINee, and Super Junior.

Felix loved it, no doubt, and he was just as fervent as his members, but the idol life had many hidden aspects that weren’t quite as fabulous.

He experienced many nights where he couldn’t sleep due to the stress and busy schedules. There were times when he was so exhausted he nearly passed out, and he took more trips to the nurse than he ever had in his entire life before Korea. Occasionally, the blonde skipped meals in order to fit more practice or korean lessons into his day. He missed his family and friends back in Australia, but he refused to talk about it with his members. He knew he was lucky to get the chance to be an idol, and he didn’t want to sound ungrateful. Plus, JYP seemed to enjoy picking on the poor boy. He pointed out the smallest mistakes during dance practices and scolded him every time he mispronounced or forgot a word. Felix looked up to JYP; he saw him as an experienced mentor and tried to take his advice to heart, but he was at a major disadvantage: he was one of only two foreign members. Chan knew the language better than Felix because he had trained for several years under JYP. He was a trainee back when the GOT7 members were first recruited and had much more time to learn. The record executive just didn’t seem to understand that, and he always acted as if keeping Felix in the group was a mistake.

The constant negativity got to him no matter how hard he tried to block it out, and the Australian boy struggled with self-confidence on a daily basis. Sometimes he wished JYP actually _had_ chosen to debut Stray Kids as a seven member group---for everyone’s sake.

Felix was startled out of his internal monologue by a loud scuffling noise behind him. He made to turn around to see what had caused the sound, but before he could, he felt a hand slap across his mouth and an arm wrap around his chest, subsequently trapping his own arms to his sides.

Felix immediately began to struggle. He wiggled and shouted, but the hand over his mouth muffled his calls for help. He kicked outwards and whipped his head from side to side. The attacker let out a string of curses that Felix couldn’t really understand and gripped his jaw tight enough to bruise. The boy used all of his strength to fight, but the man behind him held on.

Suddenly, there was a sharp, stinging pain in the side of Felix’s neck. He cried out and thrashed around, one of his heels connecting with something solid. Felix heard a grunt of pain and felt the arms holding him loosen slightly.

The boy saw it as a chance to escape, throwing his shoulders forward until he could no longer feel his attacker’s strong grip. He hit the ground but shot to his feet half a second later, and sprinted away as fast as his legs could carry him, nearly tripping several times in his haste. There was a clattering sound followed by the unmistakable crack of a glass screen breaking, and Felix knew it was his phone falling from his pocket.

The Australian native had seen enough detective movies to guess that the prick he had felt in his neck was most likely some type of sedative or drug. He had to get as far away from his attacker as possible before he blacked out. He was only five minutes from the dorms, and he knew he could make it if he ran fast enough.

Unfortunately, the sedative worked quickly. Felix realized it was becoming increasingly more difficult to run, and his vision had started to become slightly distorted. His brain was muddled, making it tough to remember the way back to the dorms.

Felix let his feet guide him, and he had just managed to turn onto the final street---now struggling to put one foot in front of the other---when a dark van pulled up beside him. It hadn’t even come to a complete stop before a pair of men in black hoodies and mouth masks hopped out. Felix’s vision was so blurry at that point, that he couldn’t even see what was five feet in front of him. He had resorted to using the closest building as a support in order to keep his body upright and moving. The two men in black each grabbed one of his arms, and the boy tried with all of the strength he had left to shake them off, but it was useless. They dragged him towards the van like one would with a sack of potatoes, where another person in dark clothes was waiting.

The last thing Felix saw before he slipped into unconsciousness was a window---six buildings down, three stories up; the only one with a light on.

Then everything went dark.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have been working on this secretly for months lol  
> I started this fic back in 2018, so obviously its very outdated. Skz have had many more comebacks since then but it was a hassle to change everything so the timeline is the same as it was when it started. If you can jump back to November when I Am You was released, you’re in good shape.  
> I will definitely not update regularly, because i am a disaster human. I will try my best not to completely abandon this work tho  
> I hope you guys like it!!! :)
> 
> Ps: I love reading comments


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The members realize something is very, very wrong.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! I decided to go ahead and update again because I had several comments from you guys telling me to continue it. Thank you so much, I'm glad you guys liked it!  
> Here's the second chapter, which is from Stray Kids (specifically Chan's) point of view.  
> As always, please leave a comment and read the end notes!

Chan was worried.

Felix had texted earlier that he had left the JYP building but still hadn’t shown up. The walk home usually wasn’t long---ten or fifteen minutes at most---yet it had been a little over twenty five minutes since Chan got the text.

Most of the other members had gone to bed already, all except Chan, Minho, and Changbin. Minho had been suckered into helping Chan clean up after the food war\---which ended with the Kitchen Warriors reigning victorious---and Changbin had muttered something about his roommates being imbeciles before disappearing into his shared dorm with Chan. The light still hadn’t been shut off, meaning Binnie was most likely not asleep yet.

Chan had hoped Felix would show up soon so he could shove a wet mop into his hands and force him to help as well, but the longer he waited, the more anxious he became.

The leader’s concern must’ve been obvious because  Minho came up beside him,  giving him a gentle nudge.

“Are you okay? You look upset.”

Chan tried for a reassuring smile, but it probably came out as more of a grimace.

“Yeah, I’m fine. I’m just worried about Felix,” the Aussie shook his head and glanced at the clock again. “He should be home by now.”

Minho followed Chan’s gaze and frowned in confusion when he saw what time it was.

“ Didn’t he say he would be home before midnight? He still has time.”

“Actually, he texted me and said he was on his way about half an hour ago.”

Minho’s eyes narrowed, and he seemed to finally understand Chan’s concern.

“We can go look for him, if you want. Changbin can finish cleaning.”

Chan chuckled. The walls were spotted with several different kinds of condiments and sauces, and the floor had practically become a fruit salad with how many berries were scattered around. Changbin was going to have a hell of a time picking them all up.

Minho patted Chan’s shoulder and smiled widely. “ You should tell him, Hyung. I don’t want Changbin holding a grudge against me.” Chan pouted, but it was no use.  Minho was immune to the leader’s ‘Australian Sexiness’ or whatever he liked to call it.  He dealt with Jisung’s aegyo on a daily basis. Nothing phased him anymore.

The dancer snorted in amusement and turned Chan around by his shoulders, gently pushing him towards the only room with any light streaming out from under the door. Chan sighed and made his way towards the door, opening it and peeking his head in until he spotted Changbin lying on his bed, phone in hand.

The raven haired boy looked up with his signature blank face.

“Are you done cleaning yet?” he asked. Chan raised an eyebrow with the level of sass that only the Mom Friend™ of the group could pull off. Changbin just smiled cutely.

“Ah! Well, Minho and I know how much you enjoy picking up after the other members---what with how many times you do the dishes for us---so we decided to leave the rest of it for you!” The Stray Kids leader clapped his hands in obviously fake excitement, and Changbin’s face dropped.

“Are you kidding me?” he asked incredulously. “I didn’t even want to be in the stupid food fight in the first place! I was forced!”

Seeing the genuine frustration in the younger’s eyes, Chan decided to tell him the truth. He knew the rapper would be worried, which was why he didn’t want to say anything in the first place, but it seemed to be the only way Changbin would willingly help out.

“Actually, I need you to take care of the kitchen because Minho and I can’t.” Changbin frowned, slightly suspicious, and Chan continued. “Felix texted me a while ago that he was on his way back but he hasn’t shown up yet. I’m sure it’s nothing, but you know how much I worry about you guys.”

Changbin’s annoyance disappeared as soon as Chan finished explaining, but it was replaced with concern. The leader knew how close the two rappers were, and he had no doubt Changbin’s mind was racing with worst-case-scenarios.

“I’m coming with you.”

Expecting the response, Chan shook his head with a small smile, “Minho already offered. Besides, we need someone here in case Felix is just running late and shows up. You can text us if he comes home, okay?” Changbin didn’t look convinced, but Chan didn’t give him a choice. He wasn’t trying to blow the entire situation out of proportion. If Felix was lost---which seemed almost impossible---then they would find him. If he was just a little late he would turn up at the dorms while they were out, and everything would be fine. At least, that’s what Chan hoped.

After making sure Changbin was actually working on cleaning the mess in the kitchen, Chan and Minho slipped on their shoes and wrapped themselves in a couple of light jackets. Minho grabbed a flashlight.

“You ready?” he asked. Chan took a deep breath and nodded.

“Yeah.”

It only took them a couple of minutes to make their way down to the building’s lobby. They decided to retrace the path the members usually took in between their dorms and JYPE first, and if they couldn’t find anything, they would try checking the back alleys and nearby businesses. It seemed highly unlikely Felix would pull a Jisung and visit a club or bar, but Chan had no idea where else to look.

The two eldest members were silent as they walked, the air around them feeling tense due to Chan’s increasing worry for his friend. He fiddled with his coat zipper and pulled his phone out every ten seconds to check for texts, his chest tightening with anxiety when there weren’t any.

Minho reached out and grabbed Chan’s hand, giving it a reassuring squeeze. The leader shot him a grateful glance. It made him feel slightly better knowing that Minho was with him. There was a chance he was freaking out over nothing, but Minho didn’t make him feel like he was overreacting. The cat-like man was always a bright presence in the dorms, and Chan was happy to have him by his side.

The Aussie opened his mouth, ready to tell Minho just that because he’s a sappy guy, when his foot connected with something on the ground. It clattered across the sidewalk, and the sound made the two idols stop in their tracks.

“What was that?” Chan wondered aloud. Minho shrugged, their hands still clasped in between them. He pulled the flashlight from his coat pocket and clicked it on. The light reflected off something small a couple feet away, and Minho stepped closer to get a better look.

“I think it’s a phone,” he declared. Chan frowned in confusion.

“Someone must’ve dropped it.”

Minho crouched down beside the abandoned device, finally releasing Chan’s hand in order to pick it up. He flipped it over and gasped.

Chan squatted beside him, suddenly feeling uneasy. Minho wasn’t one to become shocked easily.

“What’s wrong?”

Minho didn’t answer. Instead, the man held the phone out to Chan, hands shaking. The leader took it cautiously. When he looked down his stomach dropped, and his blood ran cold.

The phone case was completely white except for a small illustration of a koala bear hugging a stick of bamboo directly in the middle. It was a cute case, and Chan remembered it well considering he was the one that had bought it. It was a gift the leader had given Felix a month before they debuted, when the younger member had been feeling especially homesick. It was a little piece of Australia that Felix could take with him everywhere he went.

Only now it was lying abandoned on a sidewalk, its owner nowhere to be seen.

“Okay, okay. Let’s calm down,” Minho took a breath, his voice sounding uneven and slightly panicked. “It could be someone else’s.”

“Someone else’s? Minho, I bought this case for Felix. I gave it to him. I know it’s his!” Chan was shouting at this point, but he couldn't bring himself to care. Felix and his phone were inseparable. The fact that he had left it behind made the Stray Kids leader feel a sense of fear he had never experienced before. His head was swimming with hundreds of possibilities---all of them bad.

“Hyung, you need to calm down. Felix could've just dropped it without realizing. Here, I'll text Changbin to see if he showed up at the dorms yet.”

Chan barely heard him over the buzzing in his ears. He stood up, Felix's phone still in his hand. He hadn't even realized the screen was shattered until that moment, his mind too jumbled to function. There was absolutely no way the device would still work. It was damaged beyond repair.

Chan’s hand dropped back down to his side, and he spun around in circles, eyes straining slightly in the dark. He was looking for something, but he had no idea what. Maybe Felix had realized he dropped his phone and was retracing his steps in order to find it. Minho's theory wasn't completely impossible---Felix could be very clumsy at times.

Chan faintly heard Minho talking to someone on the phone, but he paid him no mind. The leader’s eyes were restless, darting from one area to the next, his overactive mind telling him over and over again that _he was missing something_. He groaned in frustration, and his hand tugged at his hair. He stared at the storefront directly in front of him. It was a quaint little shop with some fine jewelry on display in the window. The necklaces and earrings looked vulnerable just sitting there, only a half an inch thick glass wall separating them from greedy hands. There ought to be some kind of security set up …

Chan felt as if he had been struck by something. He whipped around, nearly giving himself whiplash, his gaze intense and desperate. There, across the street, was a small security camera, the little red light on its side blinking. It was facing the jewelry shop---and by extension---where they had found Felix’s phone.

Chan might be overreacting, but he was about to find out for sure. Whatever happened to Felix had to have been caught on tape, and Chan was willing to go to great lengths in order to see it.

 _Don't worry Felix_ , Chan thought. _We'll find you_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you again for reading! I hope you liked this chapter!  
> Chan, of course, felt his mother instincts kick in lol. I think this chapter was slightly angsty and im sorry about that. It needed to happen!!! I'm sorry lol  
> Of course, you'll get the rest of the members reactions in the next few chapters as well as Felix's pov of what happened after he was kidnapped. So stay tuned to find out more!  
> I loved reading your comments and ill do my best to respond quickly.  
> Thank you!


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Felix meets the Doctor, and the experiments begin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning to those who read the notes at the beginning of chapters ... incoming angst lol  
> This is a very angsty, sad chapter so sorry bout that. It was kind of hard to write but I'm proud of how it turned out in a weird way so I hope you enjoy!!!

Felix woke up to a blinding headache.

He opened his eyes only to slam them shut a millisecond later. There was a bright ass light shining directly into his face, and it wasn't making the pounding in his brain any easier to handle. His thoughts were muddled and slow, meaning it took him much longer to process his situation than it normally would.

Several minutes passed by before Felix realized the pressure he felt on his wrists and ankles were leather straps holding him down, the cold seeping through the back of his shirt was due to the metal table he was currently fastened to, and the ache in the side of his neck was from the needle he had been injected with.

What happened with the needle again?

Felix’s mind felt as if it was underwater, and he had to really concentrate in order to remember the events leading up to his current situation. Slowly but surely, he recalled what he could only assume was the previous night: the start of the Great Food War, the hours spent practicing in the studio, the walk back, the attacker with the needle, the mad dash back to the dorms, and finally, the men shoving him into an unfamiliar van as the sedative took over. Panic seized his body and erased any lingering sleepiness he felt, allowing him to lift his head and open his eyes.

The room he was in wasn’t pure white like he had guessed but actually an almost soothing navy blue color. Although, the calming feeling was entirely contradicted by the lack of windows or decorations on the walls. There was only one door leading out, and it gave the room terrifying dungeon vibes. Felix tried to pull his hands free, but the straps were too tight and the pain eventually forced him to give up. He noticed a thin plastic tube hanging off the inside of his arm, fixed to his skin with a small needle and a piece of tape. It looked like an IV catheter, which only meant that he was in a hospital of some sort. His new clothes also gave that impression as they were a pair of crisp, peach-colored scrubs of some sort. Other than that, the Aussie had no idea where he was or why he was there in the first place, but he could only assume whoever kidnapped him didn’t have the best intentions in mind.

The door opened suddenly, startling Felix and sending his heart into overdrive. Two men and one woman stepped inside the room wearing white lab coats. It felt as if Felix had been transported into one of those creepy sci fi movies, made worse by the fact that one of the men was dragging an IV pole carrying a bag filled with dark purple liquid in behind him. Felix watched the strangers approach warily, his entire body rigid with fear.

“Ah, good. You’re awake,” the man without the IV pole spoke, his voice warm and friendly. He was on the shorter side, and the lab coat almost looked too big for him height-wise. Surprisingly, the guy was caucasian with dirty blonde hair and forest green eyes yet he was speaking fluent korean. There were subtle laugh lines and wrinkles decorating his face, and Felix guessed he was in his late thirties to early forties. He would’ve been a very handsome and approachable man if it weren’t for the way his smile didn’t reach his eyes, automatically making him shady in Felix’s mind. “Hello. My name is Derek Hess but you may call me Dr. Hess. Do you have a name?”

Of course he had a name, but Felix trusted this guy about as far as he could throw him, which---judging by the muscles barely contained in the large lab coat---wasn’t very far at all.

Dr. Hess waited tolerantly, but after a few moments of silence he realized he wasn’t going to receive an answer anytime soon. He smiled.

“That’s okay. It’s rare for a patient to be so willing to give out information to someone they don’t know. I’ll find out eventually.” Felix didn’t like the sound of that, but the “doctor” continued on before he could protest. He whipped out a clipboard and flipped through a couple of pages. “My reports here state that you were picked up and brought to me November 16th. In other words, you are the newest volunteer for my avian research series. Yehun did well. Minhee, remind me to reward him for his efforts.”

The woman, a small, petite korean girl with her thick black hair pulled back into a ponytail, nodded and scribbled something down on her own clipboard. “Of course, sir.”

“Thank you. Now,” the blonde doctor motioned for the other man, another person of korean descent, to bring the IV pole closer to where Felix was strapped down. “Let’s go ahead and begin Phase One of the process. Is this the same serum we gave Kyuho when he first came in?”

The korean man stopped fiddling with the IV bag long enough to answer, “No sir. We used the DNA strands of a Philippine Eagle for Kyuho. This serum contains the strands of an American Kestrel.”

Felix’s mind was racing. Why the hell were they talking about bird DNA? And what did it have to do with him?

“Ah, yes, sorry.” Dr. Hess chuckled. “I nearly forgot. Ignore me, continue.”

The man bowed his head and finished setting up the IV pole beside the metal table. He grabbed a thin tube that connected to the bottom of the IV bag on one end and sported a small needle on the other. He stepped closer to Felix, gripping the needle end tightly.

“W-What is that stuff?” Felix asked. He leaned as far away from the man as he could, trying to put some distance between himself and the needle. He had no idea what that purple shit was, and he wasn’t too keen on allowing them to inject it into his veins.

The korean man holding the IV stopped and looked up at Dr. Hess. The doctor didn’t say anything for a while, too busy watching Felix. Even the woman---Minhee---seemed surprised by the fact that he spoke.

“I really didn’t expect you to sound like that.” Dr. Hess frowned, and Felix swallowed the lump in his throat. “Your voice is actually vaguely familiar for some reason.” The doctor stared at the Aussie, his gaze intense and searching. To say Felix was uncomfortable would be an understatement. He had three pairs of eyes on him, looking as if they could see right through, but he had no idea who any of these people were.

Dr. Hess pursed his lips.

“Minhee, tell Yehun that I want to see him. In my office, please.”

Minhee nodded her head. She spun around and exited the room, leaving Felix alone with the two men.

“Inject him with the serum. Then you can finish your rounds for the day,” Dr. Hess ordered the other man. “I’ll be back to check his progress in four hours.”

The korean man bowed his head in acknowledgement, and the blonde doctor turned his attention back to Felix.

“I have high hopes for you. Please don’t disappoint me.”

The doctor spoke in a gentle, warm tone, but his words sent shivers down Felix’s spine. He barely knew the guy, but he was already certain there was something wrong with his head. There were red flags popping up all over the place, and the Aussie decided he would bolt the second he got the opportunity to. He had to leave this place … and soon.

Dr. Hess smiled widely and patted Felix’s shoulder before disappearing through the only door in the room.

As soon as the door clicked shut, Felix felt a hand on his bicep. The korean man was holding his arm still as he prepared to stick the small needle into the catheter. Felix cried out in protest, struggling against the leather straps on his wrists. He didn’t have very much room to move, and the korean man’s grip was surprisingly powerful, but the Aussie used all of the strength left in his body to try and throw him off.

It was no use. The korean man was precise with his aim and attached the IV bag to the catheter while he was still fighting to get away. Once the thin tubes were connected, the man secured them and backed away. Felix looked down at his arm and shook it as violently as he could. If he got the tape off he might be able to pull the catheter out with his teeth. His torso was free to move around, and with all of the training he did as an idol, he was definitely flexible enough to bend that far.

As if he could read minds, the korean man grabbed Felix by the throat, pushing him down onto the table. The Aussie could do nothing except gasp for air as the man fastened another leather strap around his neck. Now he was completely and utterly trapped.

The pressure lifted as the man let go, and Felix could breathe again. He coughed a few times, his throat feeling tight. The korean man paid him no mind, his face completely void of any emotion or expression. He turned to the IV pole and fiddled with the tube for a moment. Suddenly, the purple liquid from the IV bag shot into the tube, gravity taking over and forcing it down towards the catheter. Felix watched it move with horrified fascination.

The korean man took his leave, exiting the room without a single word. The man was gone before Felix could even open his mouth. The Aussie was left alone with nothing to do except watch the mystery liquid enter his body through his veins.

As soon as the serum reached the needle in his arm, Felix felt an intense, searing pain unlike anything he’d ever experienced before. It was as if his blood was on fire, and his skin was melting. The sensation ripped a scream from Felix’s wrecked throat, and the boy barely recognized his own voice. It sounded inhuman. He cried out over and over again, the serum slowly making its way through his body, the pain spreading along with it.

No matter how loud he was, or how much he pleaded, no one came to help him. Felix sobbed, calling for his mother, his father, his sisters---anyone. The tears streamed down his cheeks and he thought of his band members. Where were they? Why weren’t they coming for him?

The pain had reached his heart at that point, and it felt as if it would burst at any moment. His whole body was on fire, and he just wanted to crawl out of his skin. At that moment, Felix decided death would be a better option than continuing on with the torturous experience, but he had no way of making that a possibility. He had been left there to suffer through the worst pain he had ever felt in his entire life.

And he could do nothing about it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooo .... perhaps there was a tad bit of angst. Felix was struggling a bit, but he will survive it! I can tell you that much. The next chapter will be the pov of SKZ, so you'll have to wait a bit to find out what happened to Lixie after this chapter.  
> Thank you for reading!!!


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> With no sign of Felix, Chan, Minho, and Changbin decide to tell the other members. JYP gets involved.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The aftermath of Chan and Minho finding Felix's phone on the sidewalk ...  
> It's angsty, just like every chapter so far lol, but not nearly as bad as the previous one.  
> I hope you enjoy and thank you for reading!

Minho hung up the phone after only a few moments. Chan didn’t even have to ask if Felix had shown up back at the dorms---the answer was expressed by the growing panic in Minho’s eyes.

The boy was clearly struggling. His mind was telling him something bad had definitely happened, but his heart didn’t want to believe it. His hands were trembling and he couldn’t meet Chan’s gaze.

Not wanting to push him too far too quick, Chan only nodded and followed when Minho suggested they go home.

“If Felix still isn’t home by morning, we can call the police,” he reasoned. If they waited to call the police, they would be wasting precious time which could make Felix’s situation even worse. Chan ignored the sinking feeling in his gut and kept his mouth closed. Minho was already battling with himself, and he looked so torn. If Chan tried to reason with him, it would only stress him out more.

They walked back to the dorms in silence, Felix’s broken phone a dead weight in Chan’s pocket. Minho seemed too far in thought to offer any kind of conversation, but the Stray Kids leader didn’t necessarily feel like talking anyways.

They made their way into the dorm building and up the stairs, stopping only when they stood in front of the door to their dorm. Chan lifted his hand to knock, assuming Changbin was still awake and waiting inside, but the door swung open before he even touched it.

Changbin’s hopeful face greeted them. Once he realized it wasn’t Felix standing out in the hall, his eyes dimmed and his shoulders drooped. He tried for a smile, but it was obviously forced.

“You guys find anything?” he questioned, biting his lip between his teeth worriedly. Minho didn’t speak, just shouldered past Changbin and disappeared into his room. The usually stoic rapper shot Chan a confused look.

Stray Kids’s leader took a deep breath. He reached into his pocket and pulled out the broken device, holding it up for Changbin to see. As soon as he laid eyes on it, Changbin felt the air leave his lungs with a whoosh. It was as if he was choking---drowning even. Felix never lets his phone out of his sight, and for it to be as damaged as it was … 

“A-Are we gonna call someone? We should at least say something to JYP, but if there’s no sign of him we need to get the police involved--,” the raven haired rapper spoke in one breath---too fast for Chan to process in his current state of exhaustion. The eldest member held up a hand, signaling for Changbin to be quiet.

“We decided we would call the police tomorrow morning if he still hasn’t shown up.”

Changbin frowned, eyes clouded with questions and anger. “Hyung, we can’t just _not do anything_! Felix was supposed to come home almost two hours ago. If we wait until morning, he’ll be missing for at least seven hours! I’m not just going to sit on my ass while Felix is out there alone!”

Chan sighed. He stepped forward, placing his hands on Changbin’s shoulders. Then, he pulled the younger boy into a hug.

“I know, I know. I’m just as scared as you are, believe me. I wish I could just run down every street in Seoul, screaming his name at the top of my lungs. I don’t know what happened, but I promised him that I would find him, and I’m not going to fail this time.” Chan backed away so he could look at Changbin. The younger was watching him, the pain and fear evident in his eyes. Chan squeezed his shoulders. “Tomorrow morning, we will find out what happened, okay?”

Changbin nodded.

Together, the two members made their way into their shared room. Chan locked himself in the bathroom so he could brush his teeth, wash his face, and slip into his pajamas. When he returned, Changbin was tucked into his bed, trying to burn holes into the ceiling with his glare. Chan bit the inside of his cheek.

“I know it seems impossible, but try to get a good night’s sleep. We can’t help Felix if we’re half dead,” he reasoned, placing Felix’s broken phone on his nightstand. The rapper didn’t respond, but he did pull the duvet further over his shoulders so he could curl up into his pillow.

As Chan settled into his own bed, his mind drifted back a couple of hours---when Felix left to go to the studio. It had felt like any other evening in the Stray Kids dorms, and Felix hadn’t been acting any different. _If only I had stopped him. I could’ve kept this from happening_ \---No. Chan refused to let himself think that way. It would only serve to make him miserable, and a miserable Chan was a useless Chan.

The leader ignored all of the thoughts swimming through his head, and instead counted imaginary sheep running along his wall. The exhaustion finally took its hold on him, and in a matter of minutes he was fast asleep.

The next morning, Chan awoke to a heavy weight landing directly onto his stomach. The air was knocked out of his lungs, and it took a good three minutes for it to return so Chan could breathe again. He sat up with a gasp, face flushed.

“What the hell?!” he coughed. A quiet giggle sounded out from across the room, and Chan knew immediately who had interrupted his much needed rest. “Sungie, it’s too early for this.”

Jisung snorted and flung himself down on the bed, right next to where Chan had curled up in a fetal position. He was trying to regain the lovely warmth he had felt not only five minutes earlier.

“Minho called for a family meeting. He says hyung needs to be there.”

Chan frowned, cautiously recounting the events of the previous night, trying hard to remember anything that would warrant a family meeting so early in the morning. It all came back in a rush, sending his mind racing and heart pounding. _Felix._

He still hadn’t come home, meaning he was still out there, all alone.

Chan sent Jisung a small smile. It must’ve been unconvincing because the younger member furrowed his eyebrows in suspicion. Fortunately, he chose not to comment. Chan knew Minho would want him out there as soon as possible, so he decided not to change out of his pajamas, grabbing Jisung’s hand and leading him out of the room quickly.

The living room area had always been too small for the eight boys, but they made it work. Some of the members sat in each others’ laps, while others sat on the floor. They were as close as brothers, so the skinship didn’t bother them. In fact, they usually opted to sit closer to each other even if the rest of the couch was completely free. Currently, Hyunjin’s limp body was wrapped around Seungmin, his head tucked into the singer’s neck. Seungmin appeared to be trapped in his spot on the sofa, but he didn’t mind, a sweet smile settled on his face. Hyunjin held most of Seungmin’s torso captive, but with his free arm he had pulled Jeongin closer by the waist. There was less than a centimeter between all three, and Chan would find the scene absolutely adorable if he wasn’t so concerned for Felix.

Minho had claimed one of the reclining chairs in the far corner. His hands were clasped tightly together while his leg bounced rapidly, betraying his anxiety. As soon as Jisung entered the room, he made a beeline for the dancer. The younger boy plopped down onto Minho’s lap, surprising him and successfully interrupting whatever thoughts were running through his head. Jisung guided his boyfriend’s arms around him and settled into his chest with a content sigh.

It seemed the only three people aware of the situation---or at least awake enough to care---were Chan, Minho, and Changbin. The rapper was seated on the floor, leaning up against the wall. He had distanced himself from the rest of the members, and the bags under his eyes made it clear he hadn’t experienced a good night’s rest.

Minho spotted Chan, and his mouth thinned into a tight line. The leader could tell Minho wasn’t willing to explain why they were all there, so he sighed.

“Okay, everyone,” he started. He felt six pairs of eyes on him. “Family meeting time.” Maybe it was the unusual lack of enthusiasm in their leader’s words, maybe it was the barely hidden fear in his expression, but either way, the other members immediately knew something was up.

Jeongin was the only one brave enough to speak up.

“But … But hyung, Felix isn’t here yet,” he stuttered. “We can’t start without him.”

Chan couldn’t meet Jeongin’s innocent, trusting gaze without the guilt crawling its way up his throat. He sniffed, running a shaky hand through his hair. Felix was most definitely missing, and Chan had to be the one to break it to the rest of the group. He tried to steel himself, but it was incredibly difficult to prepare for something like this.

“Actually, that’s what this meeting is about. Felix …,” the leader took a deep breath. “Felix didn’t come home last night.”

The room was silent. There was a sense of unease slowly growing, but the confusion and disbelief was stifling.

“Then what are we doing sitting here? Let’s go out and find him. Honestly, you guys should’ve woken us up last night when he didn’t show up. He could just be lost.” Seungmin gently started to untangle himself from the pile of limbs he was currently trapped in. Hyunjin and Jeongin stood after some sweet coaxing from the singer, both of them still trying to rub the sleep from their bodies. Chan shook his head in defeat.

“No, Seungmin.” The younger member stopped. He turned to stare at Chan, several questions waiting on the tip of his tongue. “We already went out last night to look for him. We found this.”

Chan had grabbed Felix’s phone before leaving his room, and now he held it out exactly as he did just a couple hours earlier, when he had shown it to Changbin. The screen was still just as shattered as it had been when he found it, proving this wasn’t all just a horrible dream. The leader could see his contorted reflection in the glass, looking back at him sadly.

Seungmin stepped forward hesitantly. He reached out for the device and held it in between his hands as if it were a delicate flower. The terrifying reality of the situation came crashing down on the remaining members, and Chan saw it all. He saw the moment the truth reached up and slapped them across the face.

Something awful had happened, and now Felix was missing.

Chan continued on. He figured the other members were all scared and extremely worried, so he wanted to give them something to hold on to … some kind of hope. “We decided if Felix still wasn’t home by the time we all woke up, we would contact the police. We’re going to need their help if we want to find him, okay?” The group let out a chorus of barely audible replies, all of them agreeing with Chan’s proposition. He made eye contact with Minho from across the room. “How about you all go eat some breakfast. We’re taking today off.”

Minho nodded and began herding the shell-shocked members into the kitchen. Changbin didn’t move from his spot by the wall, just watching as his leader sank into the now empty couch with a weak sigh, shutting his eyes tight.

“Do you think he’s scared, hyung?”

Chan didn’t have to look at the rapper to know he was close to tears. He could hear the despair through his words. Changbin preferred not to express his emotions freely, so when he did, it was strikingly obvious. The Aussie bit his lip, not wanting to lie.

“Felix is one of the strongest, bravest people I’ve ever met. I don’t doubt he might be feeling frightened, wherever he is, but I know he can handle it. You have to have some faith in him, Binnie.”

“I-I’ll try.”

The temptation to throw in a little white lie for reassurance was hard to ignore, but the leader refused to string his members on like that. They deserved his honesty, even if it was painful to hear.

Suddenly, Chan’s phone---which was tucked away in his hoodie’s pocket---rang out, loud and clear. He pulled it out to check the caller ID, and promptly froze. The contact read ‘Manager Hyung’. He must’ve been calling to inform them about a scheduled meeting or to make sure the entire group was awake and getting ready. They had all slept in one day a couple of months earlier and had received a severe scolding from the staff, Manager hyung especially. Ever since then, hyung himself decided he would dial one of the members every morning to be certain it didn’t happen again. Now, Chan was panicking. What the hell would he say?

The Aussie took a deep breath before answering. He didn’t want to make their manager wait too long.

“Hello, hyung?”

“Hello Chan, just calling to be sure you all woke up on time. Is everyone getting ready?”

_No._

“I-Well, you see, hyung … uh, not everyone? Last night, um, Felix left to practice at the studio …”

Chan paused for a moment, trying to think of a way to break the news gently.

Fortunately, Manager hyung was a very patient man when it came to the idols under his care. “He’s always been a hard worker. Did he come back too late?”

“No. No, not really. He, uh, actually didn’t come home … at all. He texted me that he was on his way, and we went out to look for him but all we found was his phone and it was broken and he still hasn’t shown up and we thought maybe we would alert the police but--,” Chan knew he was rambling, but he couldn’t help it. Manager hyung would most definitely have to tell his boss what had happened, and JYP’s reaction depended on what mood he was in. Chan’s nerves were getting the best of him. He hoped to any greater deity out there that the company founder was feeling more cheerful than usual.

“Woah, woah, slow down. Felix is gone? Are you sure he didn’t just get lost?”

“No hyung, he’s walked back and forth between the studio and the dorms many, many times. There’s no way he got lost.”

“Okay,” their manager sighed through the phone, sounding more stressed than he had when Chan first picked up. “Okay, I’ll be at your dorms in a couple of minutes. Don’t do anything crazy, like calling the police. Wait until I’m there.”

Chan could hear the rustling of clothes and the jangling of keys as Manager hyung prepared to leave and head over to the dorms. He promised not to alert the cops before muttering a goodbye and ending the call.

Changbin shot him a curious look, still seated on the floor. Chan rubbed at his eyes with the heel of his hand.

“Our manager is coming over.”

It only took around fifteen minutes for the man to arrive, and in that span of time, the members had finished their breakfast and had all gathered in the living area once again. Chan slid into the second armchair, right beside Hyunjin. It was a tight fit, but they made it work; Hyunjin looped his arm through Chan’s and rested his head on his shoulder, instantly calming the older boy. He was finally able to breath for a few moments without it feeling like his chest was caving in.

Then Manager hyung burst through the door, JYP right behind him.

Both men had their own pair of keys for the dorms, in case of an emergency. They stepped inside, removed their shoes, and turned to the boys.

“Explain,” JYP commanded.

Minho told the story this time, Chan spacing out every now and then. He couldn’t look at his boss or manager for fear of the entire situation being blamed on him. It wouldn’t be that inconceivable. Hell, the Aussie boy already blamed himself for the whole mess.

Minho finished with the family meeting they held earlier. A tense silence filled the air, JYP seemingly thinking too hard to reply.

“We all believe it would be best if we called the police, sir,” Chan spoke hesitantly. “If we’re overreacting, and Felix is truly just lost, then they can find him and bring him home.”

JYP nodded, slowly. “Yes. That makes sense. You can call, if you wish. I will reschedule so I can be here when they visit. Excuse me.” The company founder stepped out into the hallway, cell phone already held up to his ear. The door shut behind him and blocked out his conversation. Their manager, who hadn't spoken a word since he arrived, made his way over to the boys. Jeongin stood up and fell into the man’s arms for a much needed hug.

Chan pulled out his phone, staring at the keypad for a moment. Without a word, Minho crossed the room, reached out, and gently pried the device from the leader’s hands. He dialed the emergency number and pressed call.

The dancer clicked the speakerphone button, allowing all of the members to hear it ring. It only rang once before someone picked up.

“1-1-9, what’s your emergency?” a monotone female voice asked. Minho's tongue darted out to wet his lips before he spoke.

“Yeah, uh, we wanted to report a missing person?” Finally saying it out loud had an effect on all the members, their eyes dropping to the top of the coffee table and shoulders tensing with anxiety. Chan had to swallow a particularly large lump in his throat before he felt like he could breathe again.

“Okay. What is this person’s name?” Distant typing could be heard through the speaker.

“Lee Felix. He’s originally from Australia.” There was a slight crack in Minho's voice as he said Felix’s name.

“And how long has Felix been missing?”

“A little more than eight hours. He texted to say he would be back by 11:40 pm last night and he never came home.”

“Okay, so you last heard from him around 11:40?” More typing.

“Yes.”

“Did you go out to look for him? Is it possible he is just lost?”

Minho shook his head, clenching and unclenching his jaw. “We looked for him, but all we found was his phone. It was broken, and I know he’s not lost. He’s walked that route hundreds of times.”

“Can you describe what he was wearing the last time you saw him?”

Minho, with the members' help, went on to describe Felix’s outfit to the very last detail: the worn sneakers, the dark skinny jeans, the comfortable, loose red tee shirt, and Changbin’s black jacket which he had randomly grabbed off the hook. He told the operator what hair color Felix currently had, and made sure to point out his freckles. Any distinguishing features could help someone recognize him, so the members made sure to include everything they could think of.

“Okay, thank you. That will be all. We will have officers working on the case as soon as possible. If you forgot anything, just give us a call and we’ll add it onto the case file.”

Minho opened his mouth to thank the kind emergency operator woman for her time and patience, but Chan leaned forward, hands gripping the armrests of the chair so hard his knuckles were white.

“W-Wait. We found his phone in front of a jewelry store down on Hyojing Street. They had a camera pointed towards the store front. Maybe they caught Felix on tape?”

Everyone held their breath in anticipation. If the cops could get a hold of that footage, they might just find out why Felix’s phone had been lying there, broken and abandoned. It wasn’t much, but it was a start.

“I can certainly put that in the report, but there’s no guarantee that the shop owner will let us see the footage without a warrant. We’ll try it out though.” The woman did her best to reassure them, but this was obviously her way of telling them not to get their hopes up. Even if they did get the tapes, there could be absolutely nothing useful on them. “Anything else?”

“Uh-hm, yes,” JYP had just finished his own phone calls out in the hallway, slipping back through the door silently. He had leaned over Chan’s shoulder---causing the leader and Hyunjin sitting beside him to startle---and spoke directly into the phone. “Could we possibly keep this investigation out of the public eye? The less people that know about it, the better.”

Chan turned his head to look at the company founder, his eyebrows furrowed in an incredulous look. Even the operator seemed confused.

“We … We can do that, sir, but it’s strongly discouraged. If we spread the word, there will be more people out looking for Felix, and we can find him quicker.”

Stray Kids and their manager watched the man as he nodded along, mouth made into a polite smile, almost as if he was talking to the woman face-to-face. “Oh, I’m aware of this, but Felix is a member of an idol group that’s quickly rising in popularity. If we alert the press about his disappearance, the streets will be filled with crazed fans fighting each other to find him first. If it were any other person, I would agree with you. I just don’t think we’ll achieve anything other than absolute chaos if we inform the public.”

There was a short pause before the operator spoke again. “The case will be kept private, if you wish. Despite Felix’s popularity and influence, we still strongly encourage you to spread the word. The more people out looking for him, the better our chances are of finding him. But, if you feel the need to keep his disappearance out of the public eye, we will do so. Will there be anything else?”

“I think that’s it. Thank you for being so patient. Goodbye.” JYP reached over Chan’s shoulder and ended the call. He backed up a step and spread his arms wide. “The police are now aware of the situation, and I think we should leave it for them to handle. In the meantime, let’s get back to work, shall we?”

Chan’s jaw was clenched so hard he felt his teeth grind against each other. He didn’t get annoyed by his boss too often, but at that moment, he was furious. One of his idols was _missing_ , but the company founder didn’t seem to care at all, smiling from ear to ear. Chan wanted to punch the grin right off his face.

Fortunately, their manager stepped in before Chan could put his thoughts into actions.

“Sajangnim, I don’t think these boys are in the right state of mind to do any work. A day off would do them some good, in my opinion,” he spoke, bowing his head.

For a short moment, Chan was worried that JYP was going to fire their manager on the spot. The company founder narrowed his eyes and made his mouth into a thin line, staring hard at the bowed head in front of him. After a couple of agonizing seconds, he sighed through his nose.

“Very well. What’s the point of forcing them into the studio if they aren’t going to be able to do quality work? You have today and tomorrow off. As soon as we find Felix, I expect to see all of you working hard for your next comeback, got it?” JYP smiled, but it was obviously fake. He strode over to the door and started putting his shoes back on. He glanced over his shoulder only once in order to beckon Manager hyung to follow. Then, he left.

Manager hyung let out a heavy sigh, his shoulders sagging. If Chan felt burdened by the many responsibilities he carried on his back, he couldn’t even imagine how his manager dealt with it. The stressed man pulled Chan into a firm yet comforting embrace. He knew that the best way to comfort any of the members was through skinship.

“I’m sorry about him Chan. He has a one track mind, and right now, it’s focused on getting you guys prepared for your comeback. This is all just a big inconvenience to him. But,” he leaned back, keeping Chan at arm’s length. The Aussie leader could see the determination in his manager’s eyes. “We will find Felix. Whether he’s just around the block or halfway across Korea, we will find him and bring him home, okay? Just trust me on that.”

Chan felt the tears welling up, but he did his best to keep them at bay. He needed to be strong for his members, now more than ever. He only nodded and smiled, trying to show just how grateful he was for his Manager hyung.

With that, the man patted Chan’s hair and made his way over to the door. Once his shoes were on, he waved the boys goodbye, reminding them to take it easy and relax, before disappearing out into the hallway.

Chan took a moment to collect himself. When he turned to face his group, he had a soft, reassuring smile that immediately released the tension in the room. He spread his arms wide, and was nearly tackled to the ground by Jisung, followed quickly by Hyunjin, Seungmin, and Jeongin. Changbin was perfectly content with just watching their leader be squished to death, but he felt a pair of arms wrap themselves around his shoulders. Minho only tightened his grip when he felt him struggling, so the rapper gave up easily. He found that he could finally relax in his dancer hyung’s embrace.

He couldn’t help but notice, however, that there was a gap in between Jisung and Jeongin as they latched onto their leader---one that could only be filled by a bright, bubbly boy with stars dotted along his cheeks.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wasn't too bad, right? :)  
> This chapter was a filler of sorts but its still pretty important to the plot. I'm not sure how all of you view JYP irl, but I've never necessarily liked him (mostly because he treats GOT7 and Twice so much better than Skz, from what i've seen) but I know hes a lot better than other company founders *ahem* YG *ahem*  
> I think i'm warming up to him a little bit, but i doubt im ever going to actually like the guy. Thats why hes kind of a prick in this story lol. Sorry if you like him and feel that i wrote his personality and character all wack.
> 
> I'm SO FREAKING EXCITED to upload this next chapter for you guys!!! It's twice the size of every chapter so far because I was in a really good writing mode and just. kept. writing.  
> It'll introduce two new characters (oc's of mine that i hold near and dear to my heart) and its got some bad attempts at humor with a hint of angst at the end. You know me! I cant write anything without angst in it!
> 
> I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter and thank you so much for reading!


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Doctor does his research on his newest "patient." Felix makes a couple friends.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ANother chapter!!!  
> I can't tell you guys how freaking excited I am for this chapter!!! My babies are in this!!!  
> I hope you guys enjoy! This will be more light-hearted (at least until the very end) so prepare for some bad attempts at humor!!!  
> As always, thank you for reading!!!

Over the course of several hours, Felix passed out multiple times.

The purple serum was still lazily spreading throughout his body via the bloodstream, but the feeling of his muscles and organs rearranging themselves remained constant. The pain was unimaginable. It was like someone had ripped off his skin and started hacking at what was left with a dull knife. When he thought it couldn’t possibly become any worse, it did, and he only managed to withstand a few minutes of the fire in his veins before slipping into unconsciousness. The world would go black, trapping Felix alone in some kind of silent void. Normally, such a feeling would scare him, but now he welcomed it. It was peaceful, in a way, and a much better alternative than his current reality.

Felix wondered if this was what death felt like.

Once again, the Aussie was wrenched out of his empty, dark space of tranquility. Only this time, he didn’t wake up to the unbearable pain he would never grow accustomed to. In fact, he didn’t feel much of anything. He couldn’t even tell if the table was still underneath him. The only sensation he recognized was a weakness that had settled into his muscles and bones, preventing him from lifting a finger. He figured it would take too much effort to open his eyes, so he didn’t try. Maybe the void would come back for him if he just waited patiently. Maybe this time, it would keep him locked in its dark depths, forever protecting him from the pain.

Felix should have known he wasn’t that lucky.

“Well good morning, Sleeping Beauty.” Dr. Hess’s deep chuckle sounded out from beside him. “You survived your first procedure! How do you feel?”

Felix didn’t move---not that he could if he wanted to.

“Oh c’mon. Give me _something_ , here. I know you’re awake; the heart monitor doesn’t lie.”

Only after the cheery doctor pointed it out did Felix pick up on the familiar incessant beeping of the machine. He wished it would stop.

A sigh. And then, “Resistant and stubborn people don’t last very long in this facility. Your cooperation is only going to benefit you, Felix.”

The Aussie heard the irritating beeping increase in speed, but it was drowned out by his heartbeat in his ears. How did the shady doctor know his name?

Concentrating hard, Felix willed his eyelids to move. It felt like they were glued shut, but after a few moments, he managed to lift them high enough to see.

He was greeted by Dr. Hess’s blinding grin. He was leaning over Felix as he laid back on the table. The doctor was way too close for Felix’s liking, but he couldn’t do much about it. A quick glance to the left made the Aussie’s breath leave his lungs with a whoosh.

The entire IV bag of purple serum was gone. The pole still stood in the same place, and it was still attached to the catheter in his arm via a thin tube, but the bag itself was empty. In other words, Felix had an entire bag of strange, probably dangerous, fluid running through his veins.

Dr. Hess cleared his throat, forcing Felix’s attention back on him. He was looking down at a clipboard, his face contemplative.

“Name: Lee Felix, age: eighteen years, nationality: Australian, height: 171 centimeters, blood type: AB, hobbies: beatboxing, dancing, traveling, shopping for clothes---yadda yadda yadda. I have to admit, finding your information was one of the easiest things I’ve done in a while.” Dr. Hess turned, laughing, to look at someone behind him. “Hey Minhee, remember when I was trying to find info on Rose? I had to hire a private investigator over in the U.S. just to get her name.”

Minhee responded quiet enough that Felix had to strain his ears to hear her. “Yes, sir.” Her words were monotone, giving the impression that she wasn’t as amused as the doctor. He didn’t let her lack of emotion dampen his mood, however.

He turned back to Felix with a smug smirk. “I wish someone had just handed me Rose’s information like your fans did. It would’ve saved me a lot of hassle.”

The Aussie sucked in a sharp breath, eyes widening slightly. A nice punch to the nose would do this doctor some good, in his opinion, but he was still basically paralysed. The violence would have to wait until he didn’t feel like a stupid ragdoll.

“Normally, I would refrain from using high-profile citizens like you as patients. All it does is attract unwanted attention from the media and the public as a whole. Although, your body in particular seemed to react quite well to the first procedure.” He glanced back down at his clipboard. “You didn’t experience any seizures, none of your organs or blood vessels ruptured, and you sure as hell didn’t go brain dead, if you’re sitting here blinking at me. I don’t know about you, but I count that as a huge success.”

Felix wanted to scream. He wanted to rip himself from the table and escape this nightmarish room. He needed to tell people about this psychotic doctor who thought he was a mad scientist. He straight up admitted to murdering and experimenting on people--- _human beings_ \---with a cheerful smile on his face.

“I’ve decided to keep you as a patient, for now. You’ve already shown great potential for success.” He laid a calloused hand on the boy’s lower arm, like he was trying to comfort him. Felix wanted to light it on fire. “But, if you start lacking in the procedures, I’m afraid we’ll have to remove you. If you aren’t going to help me reach my goal, then I can’t have you taking up resources that could be used on a more successful patient. So try hard, yeah? You’re going to help me change the world.”

Dr. Hess patted Felix’s arm once more before spinning around and disappearing from view. He whispered something to someone, Minhee probably. Then, Felix heard a door click shut and the doctor’s heavy footsteps as they receded down the hallway.

The Aussie thought he had been left alone with Minhee, but he was proven wrong when two heads popped into his field of view, which consisted only of whatever was directly above him. One of the faces was familiar---it was the man who had injected him with the purple fluid. He was still as emotionless as ever, but this time he was joined by a second blank-faced korean man. The first dude was heavier set, with a wide face and a large, intimidating figure. The second man was slightly shorter and had more of a long face. He may have been smaller, but his muscles were very prominent.

The two men started unfastening the leather straps holding Felix down. He remained still, blinking occasionally. Even if he could move and decided to make a run for it, the Aussie knew he wouldn’t get very far. The larger man probably wasn’t fast enough to catch him, but the smaller dude certainly was. He looked fit and downright terrifying.

Once they finished with the straps, one of them reached down and removed the catheter from Felix’s arm. A drop of blood was left behind, the bright red stark against the pale skin. Then, the two meatheads roughly grabbed Felix’s arms and pulled him into a sitting position. He was greeted by the bare, navy blue walls and Minhee’s blank stare. He wondered if everyone here looked like mindless zombies.

Minhee scribbled something on her clipboard---the same one Dr. Hess had earlier---and lifted her chin.

“The patient is in Section B, stall eight. Yunkwan-ssi, drop him off and head to the mess hall. Taebin oppa will have a meal ready for him. He needs the energy.” Felix realized Minhee was speaking to the small buff guy on his left. The man---Yunkwan, he presumes---nodded stiffly. She addressed the larger dude next, “Jiseok-ssi, Dr. Hess wants you to report to Section A. One of the patients is acting up.” And with that, she strode out the door, her heels clicking as she went.

Felix noticed a wheelchair at that moment, parked next to the wall by the door. Jiseok, the large man, trudged over to it. He rolled it back towards the table and held it still while Yunkwan scooped Felix into his arms.

Now, Felix loved the idea of a strong man carrying him bridal style---he was all about that kind of stuff. But every time the boy had imagined it, he pictured a certain rapper with an unusually sharp chin as the dreamy hunk. It was not nearly as appealing when it was a short man in his late thirties with a permanent frown. Felix, still too weak to do much of anything, let himself be lifted off the metal table and into the wheelchair, putting his fantasy and any thoughts about his members aside. He needed to focus on his surroundings.

Jiseok held the door open for Yunkwan as he pushed the wheelchair through. Once the door was safely shut behind them, Jiseok turned and swiftly started down the hallway. Felix watched him round the corner and disappear. Yunkwan steered the wheelchair in the opposite direction, where the hallway ended at a set of double doors. He was silent as he pushed, but Felix didn’t mind. He didn’t want to talk to the employees here. It was obvious that they followed Dr. Hess’s orders without a second thought or any hesitance. They were his loyal little workers, so trying to reason with them was useless.

As soon as the pair were on the other side of the double doors, Felix heard quiet chatter. An immediate hush fell across the area, and he could feel the stares settle on him. The Aussie had no idea what they wanted to do to him, and the thought scared him. Like any sane person, he didn’t want to be dissected and experimented on. But, if that was their choice, then he couldn’t really do anything about it. So, the freckled boy mustered up all of his strength and used it to lift his head, ready to face whatever came next.

What he didn’t expect was to be met with curious eyes watching him from multiple cells lining the sides of a long aisleway. His lips parted and he blinked in horror. He had heard Dr. Hess mention other “patients” of his, and he knew all of them were most likely prisoners like him, but he didn’t expect so many of them. On each side of the aisle stood six literal cells. Those that were adjacent to each other were separated by a thick stone wall. As Yunkwan started pushing him forward, Felix noticed that the cells weren’t built directly across from each other. They were staggered, allowing one to see into the two cells in front of them. Each cell was also labeled with the letter “B” followed by a number. Yunkwan stopped the wheelchair in front of cell “B-8” and held down a button to the left of the cell door.

He leaned towards a small black speaker above the button and spoke, “Lim Yunkwan requesting access to Stall B-8 for patient transfer.”

He stepped back and waited, never once turning to look at Felix. In fact, the Aussie noticed that Yunkwan refused to look at any of the prisoners along the aisleway.

A moment later, the speaker crackled and responded, “Access to Stall B-8 granted.” The cell door lock retracted, and Yunkwan pulled it all the way open. He wheeled Felix into the cell, lifted him from the chair, and laid him on a surprisingly soft bed that stood flush to the back wall. Felix felt his body melt into the mattress, and he sighed, eyes drooping. He barely heard Yunkwan guiding the chair back out of the cell, but the sound of the lock clicking into place reminded Felix of his current situation, and his eyes snapped open.

The entire front wall of the cell was made of metal bars, like one would find in a prison. However, the remaining three walls were solid stone, leaving it impossible for someone in the cell to have contact with those in the cells beside them. The space itself wasn’t too small, about the same size as a child's bedroom. The Aussie expected the usual necessities to be there: the toilet, the bed, the sink, and maybe a window. The window didn’t exist, but the bed was an actual piece of quality furniture, not just a metal table with a thin ass mattress thrown on top. The toilet stood on the left side of the room with the sink beside it. There was ever a mirror which Felix noted as a possible weapon, if he ever figured out a way to escape. All in all, it had the bare necessities, but it wasn’t the Aussie’s preferred way of living.

The quiet chatter had resumed once Yunkwan left, but Felix hardly noticed. He knew his brain and body were exhausted, but there was no way in hell he was going to be able to sleep. He had too many questions, too many concerns. He allowed his thoughts to drift to his family. His members had to have figured out he was missing by now. Did they report it? Did they tell his parents? His sisters?

Are any of them worried about him?

Or did they just write it off as a dumb Australian native getting lost in the city?

… Do they even _care_?

His mind was interrupted from its self-deprecation and panicked rambling by a repetitive, and frankly annoying, whisper-shout.

“Hey, kid. Hey, kid! _Kid_ ! Hey, Freckles. Hey, dude. Bro. Hey, bro. Freckles! Hey, Noob. _Yo_! Yoohoo! Hey, dudebro. Hey, buddy---.”

“Rose if you don’t shut the fuck up I’m going to drown myself in the toilet bowl.”

“Calm your pecs, Kyu. I’m just trying to say hi to the new kid. He looks like he needs a friend.”

“He _looks_ like he just wants to sleep, so how about you zip your lips and let him rest. You can talk to him tomorrow.”

“I have training all day tomorrow. Plus, I’m sure he would like the rundown on this shitshow facility so he actually understands what’s going on. I know it would’ve made the first few weeks way easier for _me_.”

Felix felt himself perk up. He had no idea who these Rose and Kyu people were, but they sounded friendly enough. Rose even (indirectly) offered to tell him what the hell was happening at this strange, terrifying facility.

With a lot of effort, the Aussie managed to turn himself onto his side, facing the metal bars at the front of his cell. He opened his eyes.

As he noticed before, the cells were all staggered, allowing Felix to see into both of the cells across from him. In the one to the left of the dividing wall sat a young woman, seemingly in her mid-twenties. She was leaning up against the stone wall with her head tilted in Felix’s direction. What caught the boy’s attention wasn’t the numerous freckles dotting every inch of exposed skin, but the shockingly red hair cascading down her back, ending mid-shoulder blades. She had very pale skin, which only served to accentuate her freckles and hazel eyes. Felix also realized with a jolt that she was caucasian. She spoke fluent korean, so the Aussie guessed she lived in the country. He couldn’t help but wonder where her parents were from, though. The majority of caucasians in South Korea were tourists.

At first, he didn’t even notice the pair of rounded ears poking out from her hair. He blinked a few times, trying to clear his head. He had to be hallucinating. This woman couldn’t have _cat_ ears on her head, right? But then he saw the faint black markings starting at her strange ears that slowly faded as they extended down towards her face. When she smiled, her canines were long and terrifyingly sharp. The twitching tail flicking out from behind her sealed the deal.

 _She’s a furry_ , Felix thought.

Felix then let his gaze wander to the next cell over. A korean man, about the same age as the woman, sat with his legs crossed. He had longish black hair pulled back into a messy man-bun and pale yellow eyes. His features were sharp yet rigid, giving him a very intimidating appearance. Although, once he sent Felix a soft smile, the boy could tell he was truly a kind person at heart. The drastic contrast between his looks and his behavior reminded Felix of Changbin, the sudden thought causing his heart to ache.

The man’s smile turned sympathetic when the Aussie grimaced.

“Sorry to keep you awake. Rosie here is too social for her own good.” His voice was pretty deep, almost as deep as Felix’s, and it relaxed him.

“Kyuho here is just jealous he can’t keep me all to himself all the time. Right, Babe?” Rose smirked towards the wall in between them as if she could see right through it. Kyuho rolled his eyes _hard_ , and Rose gasped in mock hurt. “Don’t roll your eyes, you ass.”

Kyuho pinched the bridge of his nose, eyes squeezed shut. He twirled a finger beside his head and pointed towards Rose, signaling that she was insane.

“Don’t listen to him, kid. I’m not crazy. I’m just … vivacious,” she protested. Huh. Maybe she _could_ see through that wall.

Kyuho laughed, leaning far forward with the force of it. Only then did Felix’s tired mind comprehend that he had bird wings.

He didn’t know why he hadn’t noticed them yet; they were large enough that they loomed nearly two feet over Kyuho’s head. They were the color of rich milk chocolate but the edges of the individual feathers were much lighter, giving the wings a nice sort of hombre. Felix found that he couldn’t look away.

“Oh, Kyuho, you big flirt, are you flexing?” Rose giggled, her nose scrunching.

Kyuho frowned in confusion, “No? You know I only flex for you, my love.” He wiggled his eyebrows suggestively. They acted like a couple, constantly teasing each other.

“New Kid is trying to burn holes in your head with his eyes,” Rose snorted. Felix felt the blood rush to his face and hid his face in a pillow. He hadn’t realized he was staring so hard. “I just assumed you were flexing your biceps because it’s been proven that your muscles are distracting to everyone, regardless of age, gender, or sexuality.”

“Oh,” he said, nodding in understanding. “No, I think he’s just surprised by my wings.” He finished speaking and stood up, brushing the dirt from his pants. Then, he turned his back to Felix and subsequently gave him a perfect view of the wings.

They were even larger than the Aussie realized. Kyuho had them tucked into his body, but they still extended past him in both width and height. In fact, the wingtips touched the ground if he leaned back too far. Felix had no idea how the man kept his balance with such big appendages attached to his back.

“Ooh! What do you think about my tail, Kid?” Rose stood up as well, spinning around. She wiggled her butt in Felix’s direction. Her tail twitched and the Aussie felt a chuckle bubble up in his throat.

“You a furry?” he giggled.

The screech of anger that escaped Rose’s lungs made all of the cells down the aisle go silent. Kyuho’s whole body shook with laughter, eyes squeezed shut, but he didn’t make a sound. The only thing anyone could hear was Rose’s utter betrayal as she ranted.

“How _dare_ you? How _dare_ he, Kyuho!? I am not a fucking furry! My ears are attached to my head and my tail isn’t held on via buttplug, thank you very much. Ooh, Kyuho, I’m gonna kill this kid. Do I look like the type of person to have a fursona? _Huh_?!”

At this point, Felix was laughing so hard he felt tears run down his cheeks.

“Rosie,” Kyuho began. He was still gasping for breath, and his cheeks hurt from smiling so hard. “Rosie, calm down. I--I don’t think he meant what he said, right?” The man raised an eyebrow at Felix, the amusement evident in his voice.

“Y--Yeah, no, I’m sorry,” the boy managed. He wiped the tears away and wheezed.

Rose pursed her lips, but it was obvious she was holding back a grin.

“I accept your apology. As long as you never bring this up again, we’re cool.”

The chatter among the other cells started up again, and Kyuho sat back down on the floor. He turned towards Felix as Rose did the same in her cell.

“You got a real deep voice, kid. How old are you?” he asked.

Felix shifted his body into a comfier position. There was an increasing ache in between and around his shoulder blades, making the boy very uncomfortable.

“I turned eighteen in September.”

“You’re super cute too. Like, you could be an ulzzang or something,” Rose pointed out.

“Well, actually,” Felix shrugged the best he could with his body mashed into the mattress. “I’m an idol under JYP Entertainment, so you’re right, in a way.”

Kyuho tilted his head, confused. Rose did too, on her side of the dividing wall. They looked like a pair of puppy dogs, making Felix giggle.

“Like a trainee?” the redhead wondered aloud. “That’s really risky for Derek to start picking up idol trainees off the streets. He’s getting bolder.” Kyuho’s eyebrows furrowed at her comment. It took a moment for Felix to figure out who Derek was. Then he remembered: Dr. Hess’s first name was Derek.

“No, my leader, Bang Chan hyung, chose seven other trainees and formed a group. JYP put us through a survival show to see if we had what it takes, if we worked well together, and all that shit. We debuted earlier this year and have had two comebacks since.”

“You’re an active k-pop idol?” Kyuho asked, the disbelief evident in his voice. “Under one of the top three entertainment companies?”

“Yeah. My group’s called Stray Kids. Not to brag, but we’ve already gained a _lot_ of fans: Korean and international.”

Rose bit at her lip. “I don’t know whether I should be hopeful or scared.” When Felix frowned at her, she continued hastily. “I mean, I’m happy for you, of course. It’s just, I don’t know why Derek would do this. If you’re an idol from an active k-pop group, then you’ve got thousands of people watching your every move. Your members, your manager, your family, and especially your fans are going to notice you’re gone. Why the hell would he choose to nab such a high-risk target?”

“But you have families too, right? Someone’s going to realize you’re missing,” Felix argued.

“I was surrendered into the foster care system as an infant. My parents couldn’t survive an entire day without snorting a couple lines of cocaine, apparently. No one wanted to adopt, so I graduated out when I was your age. I moved to South Korea from the U.S. a few months later for a job opportunity. I think the only people that noticed my absence were my coworkers, but they probably didn’t care enough to do anything.” Rose seemed unbothered by her tragic backstory. She retold it without breaking her smile.

“Yeah, and my family disowned me because they found out my four year relationship was fake. I was pretending to date my neighbor so that her family wouldn’t find out about her girlfriend. Long story short, her dumb ass cousin outed her which exposed me, her fake boyfriend. My parents wouldn’t stop talking shit about her so I called them a bunch of ‘ignorant bigots’ and they disowned me. I moved out and cut contact with them nearly ten years ago. They probably think I’m dead,” Kyuho snorted.

“I … I’m so sorry. I didn’t---,” Felix started. He was lucky to have such a supportive, caring family who showed him how much they loved him everyday. He considered his members to be a part of that family, and the thought of them treating him how Rose and Kyuho were treated made his heart break.

“You don’t have to apologize, kid. We’re both past it. It was sucky when it happened, but we have each other now, so don’t feel too bad.” Rose’s voice was soft and calm, Kyuho nodding in agreement in his cell.

“Felix.”

“What?” she leaned closer as if it would make it easier to hear him mumbling from across the aisle.

“My name is Felix,” he stated, louder this time. The ache between his shoulder blades was getting increasingly worse.

Rose’s smile softened and Kyuho chuckled.

“Well, it’s nice to meet you Felix. I’m Rose McMurray. And this hunk of man meat is Kim Kyuho.”

“It’s a pleasure,” Kyuho greeted. “Although, your name doesn’t sound korean. Where exactly are you from?”

“I was born and raised in Australia, Kyuho-ssi.”

“Please, call me hyung---,” Kyuho began, a sincere smile decorating his cheeks. He was interrupted, however, by a suddenly very enthusiastic Rose, practically vibrating in her seat on the floor.

“ _Are you from Australia_?” she gasped in perfect english, a grin lighting up her whole face.

“ _Uh, yeah? I just said_ \---.” Felix stuttered, only to be cut off.

“ _Because I’d like to get you Down Under my bed sheets tonight, baby._ ” She finished her cringey pick-up line with a pair of double finger guns pointed at Felix.

“ _I can’t believe you just did that._ ” The Aussie had never before felt ashamed of his home country, but now he was. Rose completely decimated the pride he had in his origins with thirteen simple words.

“ _Well I did, and it was incredible. I’m such a fucking genius like_ \---,” Rose gasped as she rapped her knuckles on the wall. “Kyu! Oh my gosh he’s gonna be a kangaroo, I can just feel it.”

Kyuho shook his head in obvious disappointment. Felix just stared, a little confused. Rose switched between korean and english too fast, and the boy didn’t know if he heard her right.

“A kangaroo? Like, the bouncy animal down in Australia?”

Rose opened her mouth to explain, but Kyuho beat her to it. His expression had shifted to something serious, and Felix felt himself tense as a darker atmosphere settled around them. It didn’t help that his spine felt like it was on fire.

“Felix, what do you know about this place so far? Did the Doc say anything? Did you see something you found … suspicious?”

The boy thought for a moment.

Frankly, everything he’s encountered at this “facility” was suspicious: the shady doctor, the dungeon-like room with the metal table, the hospital-like clothes, the purple liquid they had injected into his body, the fucking _cells_ holding innocent victims who were all in the same position as him. He decided to start by listing the less obvious ones.

“They were talking about phases and procedures. That doctor dude acted shady as hell and told me I was a volunteer or something. Actually, he mentioned you, hyung. He asked one of his assistants what kind of serum they were using---if it was the same as yours, and the guy told him that you had an eagle and I had a kestrel. Then they injected some shit---.”

“Woah, woah. What did they say about the birds exactly? Did it have to do with their DNA?”

There was a hint of fear in Rose’s strange eyes. Felix stuttered under such an intense gaze. “Y-Yeah, I think so? He said the serum had strands of kestrel DNA. Then they shot it into my arms with the catheter.” The Aussie started panicking at the expressions on his new friends’ faces. They were terrified. “Why? What’s wrong?”

“Felix,” Kyuho sighed after a short, unbearable pause. “This facility is basically Dr. Hess’s mad scientist lab. He has a team of morons that drive into Seoul and bring back a new ‘volunteer’ or patient for their boss to mess around with. Dr. Hess has a major god complex. He thinks he can alter the natural composition of a living organism to create something new. He brings in a new patient and introduces the DNA of an animal into their body through stem cells. I don’t understand exactly how, but he told me once that he grows the stem cells infused with animal DNA in his lab. He adds them to a serum which acts as a protective barrier to shield the cells. Then, he injects it into his patient, and the stem cells start to overpower the normal, healthy cells. The burning pain you felt? That was your cells attacking each other. The serum throws your system out of whack, allowing the animal DNA to start producing---erm, animal characteristics, I guess you could say.”

Felix’s mind was already mush from the procedure. Kyuho’s scientific shit wasn’t making it any better.

Rose seemed to take notice.

“I’m sorry Felix. He likes to give the long, boring explanation,” she joked. She was trying to act like it was no big deal, but she couldn’t hide the concern in her voice. “Derek Hess is a crazy bitch. He thinks that if he can find a way to create human-animal hybrids, he’ll become rich? Maybe he’ll save his failing marriage? I don’t really know, and I don’t really care. He’s injecting us all with some purple shit that turns us half-animal. For example, I’m half leopard, Kyuho is half eagle, and from what you’re telling us … you’re half kestrel.”

“But I don’t have wings,” he stated, his mind still struggling to catch up. His back suddenly throbbed, the pain shooting through his limbs and back to his spine. It felt like something was trying to claw its way out of him.

“Not yet. It took me a full week for my wings to emerge. They start out all naked and gross. In a couple of months, they’ll be fully formed.”

Felix could barely hear what Kyuho was saying at that point. The pain was radiating all throughout his body now. It wasn’t nearly as bad as the serum, but it wasn’t pleasant.

“Felix? You okay, hun?” Rose called out softly.

Her words didn’t reach the Aussie as he started writhing on his bed, finally able to move. He wanted to yell, but his throat was already wrecked from his screaming earlier. He didn’t want to make it any worse.

“Felix! What’s happening? Felix?!” Rose was standing up against her cell’s metal bars, gripping them tight with fear. Kyuho still sat on the floor, rigid in his shock.

“He’s sprouting.” The words left his mouth in the form of a statement, but he still couldn’t believe it himself. There was no possible way that Felix’s wings were already emerging.

“What do we do, Kyu?! He’s _suffering_!”

Felix was on the floor now, the cold stone feeling excellent on his sweaty torso. He had ripped his shirt off at some point in an attempt to alleviate the pressure on his spine. Something was pushing its way out of his body, clawing desperately at his skin. There were two lumps forming on the boy’s back, growing taller and taller as the minutes passed. He was gasping for breath, mind and body too exhausted to be going through so much physical strain. His skin burned as it stretched further and further.

Felix closed his eyes and curled up on the stone floor. His only option was to wait it out, praying for the dark void to swallow him and take him away from the pain. _Please._

Finally, after nearly ten agonizing minutes, there was a ripping sound.

The skin on his back had buckled under the pressure, tearing apart to make way for the two wimpy pink bird wings to emerge. They were gross and tiny, just like the wings of a newly hatched chick.

Felix couldn’t care less about the foreign appendages he had just sprouted. All he knew was that the intense, burning pain was gone, replaced by a dull throbbing. There was blood running down his back, dripping onto the floor, and pooling underneath his hands and knees.

He didn’t care.

The rips in his skin were wide open and unprotected. There was a major risk for infection if they weren’t cleaned and stitched up.

He didn’t care.

Rose and Kyuho were calling his name, eyes wide and terrified. They were causing enough of a commotion to attract the attention of every person in the building, including the shady Dr. Hess.

He didn’t _care._

Because now? Now Felix could sleep. He could shut his eyes and let the calming darkness sweep over him.

And that’s exactly what he did.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So..... what did you think??  
> Are my children Rosie and Kyuho precious or what? I love them so much it's not even funny haha  
> I really hope you enjoyed and I maybe made you chuckle a bit. The next chapter will throw us back into the angst because I'm truly awful to you guys lol.  
> Thank you for reading! See ya next time!


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The police get involved. The members' worst fears are realized.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow! Would you look at that! More ANgst?? How surprising!!!  
> Sorry guys lol. This whole chapter is necessary for the plot and the angst is far from over.  
> Hopefully you can enjoy it regardless and thank you for reading!!!

Three days had passed since Felix disappeared. The bright, sunny boy’s absence was felt by everyone at JYP Entertainment. The members of Stray Kids had been forced to return to work by JYP, despite their manager’s protests, but they were too distracted to get anything done. They winced whenever someone asked about Felix in the halls, and they barely posted on social media. The hyungs in GOT7 and Day6, the Twice noonas, and especially the Stays were getting increasingly worried. Chan had been hoping that their boss would allow them to take a hiatus until Felix was back, but he remained stubborn. He seemed to believe that Felix was just a dumb Aussie native who got lost in the big city of Seoul, and they would find him eventually.

Unfortunately, JYP was proven wrong mid afternoon on the fourth day.

The members were ordered to report to Board Room Six for a meeting with the company founder. When they arrived, JYP was seated at the head of the long table with their manager to his right. There were two unfamiliar men on JYP’s left, both with tired expressions. JYP gestured for the idols to sit alongside their manager.

Once they were settled, JYP turned to the strange men. He nodded with a polite smile.

“Everyone is present. You may begin.”

One of the men, a muscular guy with stony features, cleared his throat and pulled a laptop out of a bag on the floor. He opened it, speaking as he typed, “A few days ago, you reported a young man by the name of Lee Felix missing.” Chan noticed the other members tense up, once again reminded of their friend’s disappearance. The man continued, “I am Sin Minjun and this is my partner Yu Jihoon. We are the detectives assigned to Felix’s case.”

“Excuse me,” JYP interrupted. He was frowning in confusion. “You say you are both detectives?”

Minjun nodded. “We were instructed to investigate the disappearance of Lee Felix, yes.”

“I don’t see how this situation would warrant an actual investigation. Felix is originally from Australia, so it’s very likely that he just lost his way.”

Chan clenched his jaw. He hated sitting there, doing nothing to stand up for his friend, his _brother_. Felix wasn’t some dumb tourist. He’d been living in Korea for almost two years. He walked that same route to and from the studio every single day, yet JYP still thought he was stupid enough to get lost. Chan wanted nothing more than to shoot to his feet and scream in his boss’s face, but he knew that would be unwise. Losing his temper and yelling wasn’t going to help Felix in the slightest.

“I’m afraid not,” the detective turned his attention to the members. His face was grim, and Chan felt his heart drop. “We managed to get a warrant for that security camera you mentioned. The footage shows your friend being attacked by three masked suspects. Another camera closer to your dormitory building reveals a large black van fleeing the scene. We believe that Lee Felix was kidnapped, and the van was used as a getaway vehicle. I’m very sorry.”

Out of the corner of his eye, Chan saw some of the other members burst into tears, but he couldn’t hear them over the roaring in his ears. His head was spinning and he couldn’t even tell if he was breathing. Felix had been _kidnapped_ . He was out there somewhere, being held by a group of strangers who were doing _God knows what_ to him. Chan blinked, and suddenly there were tears streaming down his face, but he still found that he couldn’t make a sound. He didn’t want to believe it, but why would the detectives lie? Why would they lie about someone being kidnapped? Felix was gone because someone took him, ripped him from the safety of his family. He was all alone with his attackers. He must be terrified, or maybe he’s injured and in pain. What if he was already dead? 

Manager hyung was the only thing keeping Chan from getting lost in his whirlwind of emotions, the strong hand gripping his shoulder serving as an anchor.

“I--I find that extremely hard to believe.” JYP scoffed, his usually calm demeanor broken by his disbelief and panic. “Why would anyone in their right mind kidnap an active idol? Do you have the camera footage? I want to see it.”

Detective Minjun bit the inside of his cheek. He seemed hesitant, but his partner nudged him encouragingly, and the detective sighed. He took the laptop and turned it around. Chan was grateful that the younger members were all seated at the far end of the table, at an angle where they couldn’t see the computer screen unless they moved. He didn’t think that it would be good for them to physically see their friend’s kidnapping. They were already distraught enough; Hyunjin and Jisung, despite having tears in their own eyes, were doing their best to comfort Seungmin and Jeonginnie, who were sobbing so hard their bodies shook. Chan tore his gaze away from devastated younger members, knowing that he should also check up on the others. Minho’s eyes were red and puffy, but he managed to send Chan a wobbly smile. The dancer was attempting to calm himself with deep, controlled breaths, but his whole body was trembling. Chan could see the way his hands shook in his lap. When the leader looked at Changbin, he felt his heart shatter even further.

The rapper was a mess. He was hunched over just slightly, shoulders heaving with every silent sob. His eyes were shut tightly, and his nails were leaving stinging indents in his palms from the force of his clenching fists. He was trying to keep his pain to himself because he didn’t want to bother the other members with it, but Chan made a quick promise that he wouldn’t let Changbin go through this agonizing experience alone. The Aussie reached under the table and gently unclenched Changbin’s fingers. He massaged the spots where the rapper’s nails left harsh marks until Changbin lifted his head to look at him.

Chan knew that his tear-streaked face and bloodshot eyes weren't all that comforting, but he held Changbin’s stare anyways. There many words exchanged without being spoken, most of them an attempt at consoling the rapper, but among them was a vow. A vow that no matter what, Chan would find Felix, and he would bring him home. Changbin responded with a slight nod, and the leader knew that they would be able to get through this, as long as they stayed together and supported each other.

Chan felt the grip on his shoulder tighten just slightly, and he turned to be met with Manager hyung’s shaky smile. The detectives had the footage ready.

Minho and Changbin inched closer and Detective Minjun angled the laptop so the screen was visible to everyone---except the younger members. He clicked play, and Chan sucked in a breath.

The footage showed a grainy image of a person. It might’ve been low quality, but the person was so distinctively _Felix_ that it hurt to watch. He was walking along the sidewalk, his worn sneakers bright against the grey building beside him. His hands were in his jacket pockets, and he appeared to be taking a casual stroll. Suddenly, Felix perked up a little. He started to turn to look over his shoulder, but a large masked man came up from behind him and wrapped his arms around his torso before he could. Felix started kicking and wiggling as hard as he could. Chan felt Changbin’s entire body tense beside him, and he grabbed the rapper’s knee so tight it would probably bruise. It might have hurt, but at least the gesture allowed Changbin to relax the tiniest bit. In the footage, Felix kept struggling, and he didn’t see the second masked man approach him from the side with a syringe in his hand. In the corner of his eye, Chan could see Minho shaking with anger. The man quickly injected Felix and backed away. Felix panicked, flailing his limbs in hopes that he could free himself of his attacker’s grip somehow. Chan saw the moment when Felix’s heel connected with his attacker’s shin, and he leaned closer to the computer screen with eager eyes. The freckled boy threw his body forward until he was loose, falling to the ground. Not even a second later, Felix was on his feet again, sprinting away from his attackers as fast as he physically could. Changbin whimpered quietly, and Chan realized he was staring at the broken phone Felix had left behind in his haste to escape.

The detective spun the laptop back around and closed it. “The footage from the other camera only shows a black van fleeing the scene. We weren’t able to get the license plate, but we’re currently working on tracking the route that the van took as it drove away.”

“How can you be sure that the individual in the footage is even Felix? It was very low quality, and I’m not sure how reliable it can be if I can’t even tell who it is---,” the company founder was grasping at straws, but he was desperate. Chan could tell as much, and he felt the anger burning in his chest, rising until he couldn’t hold it back anymore. JYP was blatantly ignoring the proof that had been handed to him.

“How can you be so stupid?!” Chan shouted, standing up from his seat. The room went quiet, and JYP’s eyes widened. His mouth opened and closed like a gaping fish. Chan could tell by the look in his boss’s eye that he was in a shitload of trouble, so he might as well speak his mind now. He didn’t think he would get a second chance. “The proof is right in front of you! Felix left our dorms wearing those clothes, and we found his phone exactly where he dropped it in the footage. How many people do you think have been reported missing in our area, huh? I’ll give you a hint: one. One person, and that’s Felix. You’re denying the truth because you’re afraid of it. You’re scared that Felix’s kidnapping will reflect badly on your company. You don’t even care that one of your idols is missing because you’re too busy trying to cover your own _ass_! Tell me I’m wrong.”

The room was dead silent except for the occasional sniffle, everyone watching the company founder as he sat there with a blank expression. He held Chan’s furious stare for a minute or two. Next to him, Manager hyung was flicking his head back and forth between his boss and the Stray Kids leader. It seemed as if everyone was holding their breath, waiting for the inevitable burst of rage followed by a swift and harsh punishment.

However, it never came.

JYP sighed, his head dropping and his gaze leaving Chan, “You’re right, Bang Chan. You are completely right. I’ve refused to believe what I already knew to be true. As soon as I was informed about the situation, I knew that Felix was not just lost. He’s an intelligent young man, and he traveled that route everyday. I just had the childish thought that maybe, if I acted like everything was okay, everything _would_ be okay. I’ve been neglecting my duties as the founder of JYP Entertainment because I haven’t done enough to help you find your missing member … my missing idol. I want the young men and women under my supervision to feel safe and protected. I will do my best to assist the detectives and the members of Stray Kids in your search for Felix. If you need anything, let me know. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to contact Felix’s parents.”

JYP stood and promptly left the room. The detectives looked slightly bewildered, most likely a little surprised at finding themselves caught in the middle of a full on fight. Chan sank back into his seat. He was exhausted both physically and mentally, but he took a deep breath and pushed it to the back of his mind. He had to take care of his members. As much as he wanted to scoff at JYP’s poor attempt at an apology---during which he didn’t even remember to apologize---he knew it was the best he was going to get. Hopefully, the company founder would use his common sense and allow the members to take a hiatus in order to focus on the search.

Manager hyung seemed to understand that Chan was feeling a little out of it because he leaned towards the table to address the detectives.

“How should we move forward with the search?” he questioned. “We can start a livestream or make a short video to inform the fans and the public. We can also set up an interview on a popular show to help get the word out.”

Detective Minjun looked to his partner as the man spoke, “Yes, we need to spread the message in order to get more people out looking for Felix. Although, I’m not sure how structured a livestream is for informing the public. We can set up a press conference for the members to directly speak to the press and answer any questions. Also, we can try to get a message out to the kidnappers. In some cases, they demand a ransom. In others, they take the victim for their own purpose. Sometimes, an emotional plea from the family and friends of a victim can convince their kidnappers to release them. We will explore every possible avenue. We truly want to bring Felix home safe, but I need to warn you. There is a chance that we won’t find him in time.”

Chan swallowed the lump in his throat.

“What … What should we do in the meantime,” he managed, voice cracking just slightly.

Detective Minjun sent him a sympathetic smile. “It would be better for you all to continue on as normal. Keep posting on social media, keep talking to your fans, and just---just take care of each other.” He sighed, and Chan could see the bags under his eyes. It was obvious that he wasn't sleeping much---too busy stressing over this case---and the Stray Kids leader decided then that Detective Minjun was someone they could trust. He seemed to truly care about Felix and his wellbeing, despite having never met the boy. "What I've learned from previous experience is that you can get through this if you have loved ones to support you. As long as you watch out for each other and, most importantly, allow yourselves to hope, you'll be okay."

"Thank you," Chan whispered, voice cracking. He couldn't manage anything else, but Detective Minjun's eyes reflected his understanding. He didn't need to hear Chan express his gratitude because it was evident in his voice.

"Of course. We'll be on our way then," the man stood from his chair, placing the computer back into the bag on the floor. As he picked up the bag, he nudged his partner.

Detective Jihoon reached a hand into his jacket and pulled out a small, simple card. He laid it on the table, his expression blank. "Both of our cell numbers are on here as well as our specific precinct's phone number. Feel free to call anytime with questions or concerns."

"Unfortunately, we can't discuss anything related to our case's progress. But, if you remember anything else you'd like to tell us, give us a call," Detective Minjun added on.

The two detectives bowed their heads---the Stray Kids members and their manager standing to return the favor---before turning and disappearing through the same door JYP had used a couple minutes earlier.

The room was silent after they left. Manager hyung excused himself to go find his boss, but Chan barely even acknowledged him. His head felt like lead, and his eyes wouldn't focus on anything but that little white card on the table.

A pair of arms wound themselves around Chan's shoulders, breaking him from his sluggish thoughts. Jeongin had his face resting in the crook of Chan's neck, small puffs of air leaving his lips to brush against the skin there. Somehow, just his presence---the fact that Jeongin and the other boys were safe and standing right next to him---calmed Chan and brought him down to earth better than any reassuring words or hopeful beliefs ever could. It allowed the Aussie to actually take a moment to breathe, his lungs aching with the force of it. His heart was still beating like a drum, but the oxygen helped clear his mind.

After a few minutes, Chan gently pulled himself from Jeongin's embrace. When the youngest member looked at him, Chan was able to show him a genuine, albeit small, smile.

"Thank you," he mouthed. Jeongin returned his little grin, backing away to give the leader some personal space.

Chan turned back to face the other members. He knew that one of the darkest times in their lives had only just started. They would have to survive for who knows how long with the knowledge that their friend---their brother---was being held against his will by a group of sick bastards. They had no idea why he had been taken from them. They had no idea what he was feeling. They had no idea if he was even alive, but they had to allow themselves a sliver of hope---a shred of hope that one day, he would be returned to them in one piece.

Chan could tell that his boys were exhausted. Their hearts were aching for their lost friend. But, he could also see the fire in their eyes. A glint of fierce rage towards the cowards that took their friend in the middle of the night. Whoever had dared to lay a hand on Lee Felix will surely regret it. Stray Kids were not just a group of idols, they were family, and anyone who messed with their family had Hell to pay.

Chan spread his arms, allowing all of his boys to fall into them. A few still had tears in their eyes, and a few were clutching each other for dear life, but they all stepped into his embrace as if he was their lifeline---their tether to the ground. In a way, he was.

Chan didn't like to make promises that he wasn't sure he could keep, but when he thought back to the silent vow he made to Changbin---the vow that he would bring Felix back no matter what---he knew that he wouldn't break it. He _couldn't_ break it, because if he did, their family would fall apart, and the world would lose its light all together.

They had to believe that Felix would come home, because if they didn't, their family wasn’t going to survive.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'M SORRY!!!  
> No I'm not lol. It wasn't too bad, hopefully. I'm pretty sure Felix's procedure was worse but this is still a tense, sad chapter.  
> At the moment I'm very salty because ao3 deleted this chapter and its notes when I tried to post it, and now I have to rewrite them all. Ugh.  
> So far, we've only had Chan's pov even tho this is a Changlix fic. Do not fear, for we will be able to hear our little Baby Binnie's thoughts soon enough!  
> As always, thank you for reading!!!


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The aftermath of Felix sprouting his wings. An alliance is made.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hellooo!!! Back again with a teensy bit of angst followed by some floof! You will get some insight into Dr. Hess's operation and how he deals with special cases such as Felix. Rose and Kyuho are protective of a boy they just met, but thats normal for them lol. Hope you enjoy and thank you for reading!!!

Felix was really starting to get sick of the navy blue walls that greeted him every time he opened his eyes. The incessant beeping of the heart monitor was also a familiar sound to him, unfortunately. However, this time, Felix noticed a few things that were different about his current predicament compared to the rest. For one, the cold metal table was under his stomach instead of his back, forcing him to turn his head in order to lay comfortably. Also, the excruciating burning feeling wasn't present in his body, but the skin and muscles in his back, especially around his shoulder blades, were throbbing with a dull ache. And finally, there was a relieving absence of zombie-like assistants and insane doctors.

"Ah, Felix! You're awake!"

He spoke too soon.

Dr. Hess's sandy haired head popped into view in front of Felix. There was a joyful smile on his face that stretched from ear to ear. He looked downright ecstatic.

"Felix, you have no idea how happy I am to see you," he breathed. He seemed winded, almost as if he ran into the room. He pulled a rolly chair out of nowhere and collapsed into it, the maniacal grin still spread wide across his face. "I've been waiting for you to wake up since we found you. I hope you know just how unbelievably proud of you I am."

For Felix, who was still blinking the sleep from his eyes, Dr. Hess was talking complete nonsense, which wasn’t necessarily unusual. It just wasn't appreciated at that very moment.

"What the fuck?" The Aussie whispered, eyes narrowed.

Dr. Hess either didn't hear him or chose not to acknowledge his foul mouth as he launched straight into his story, "Rose and Kyuho were causing such a ruckus, and that's quite strange for them; they're usually very well-behaved. So, we knew we should check it out. When we found you lying in your stall, all bloody and torn to shreds, we thought you were dead! But, then I saw those beautiful little wings sprouting from your back, and my heart nearly stopped."

"I wish it had."

“So we carried you back to the exam room," Dr. Hess ignored him, seemingly gifted with selective hearing and a crazy amount of patience. "And we sutured your wounds closed. You lost a bit of blood, but not enough for it to be a concern. Since then, we've kept you here, where we can monitor you and help you recover."

The man gestured to the heart monitor and the IV pole next to him. Felix tensed at the sight of the tall metal pole, but relaxed a little when he realized the bag of fluid suspended from it was clear, not purple. His attention switched back to the doctor as the man scooted his rolly chair closer to the table.

"You have truly amazed me, Felix. It took Kyuho an entire week to sprout his wings. It was probably less painful for him---more uncomfortable---but you managed to sprout in a couple _hours_. It's incredible! We ran tests on both of you, trying to find anything that would explain why you matured so much faster, but we're still clueless. Have you had any increased reactions to anything before? Have you taken any medications that lost effect on you quicker than other people with the same prescription? When you drink alcohol, do you have a high tolerance? Do you sober up faster than your friends? Do you build muscle easier than everyone else?"

Felix was starting to feel overwhelmed and extremely pissed off, especially since the doctor’s face came a bit closer with every question he asked.

"What? No! What are you talking about? Just let me go you fucking psycho!" he pleaded, voice breaking from the strain. He wanted to go home.

Dr. Hess scooted his chair further away, finally giving the Aussie some personal space. He sighed, rubbing a hand across his chiseled chin.

"I'm afraid I can't do that Felix. You're an enigma. You took to my serum better than any of my other patients meaning there's something about you that makes you more susceptible, and I must find out what it is. You've already started growing little feathers in the three days that you've been in this room. After he sprouted, it took Kyuho another two and a half weeks for his first feather to appear. You're special, Felix. I can't just let that go to waste." Dr. Hess leaned forward until he was a couple centimeters from Felix's face. The Aussie flinched away, but he couldn't go nearly far enough. The doctor's smile was blinding. "Don't tell anyone else, but you're my favorite patient."

Felix felt his heart beating out of his chest. He knew the doctor was insane---he had nonchalantly brushed off the fact that he had murdered and kidnapped multiple innocent people for Pete’s sake---but the man was truly psychotic. Either he had no idea that what he was doing was wrong, or he knew exactly what he was doing and just didn’t care. Felix didn’t know which one was worse.

“Now that you’ve woken up, I think it’s safe to have you returned to your room. Take it easy for the next few weeks. I don’t want you to rip your sutures, and your body is still healing so you need to rest. I’ll have one of my nurses check on you occasionally throughout the day---just in case. Sounds good?” the doctor chirped. He clapped once, still grinning. Felix’s only answer was a glare.

The doctor chuckled before scooting his rolly chair back from the table and standing up.

“I’m very excited for you Felix. You’re going to do incredible things.”

And with that, the doctor turned and disappeared from the room. Only moments later, one of the zombie-like attendants came into view, pushing a wheelchair in front of him. A feeling of deja vu took over as Felix was unstrapped from the table and dropped into the wheelchair. He was carted out of the room and through the hallways of Dr. Hess’s mad scientist lab until they stopped in front of those large double doors Felix had started to hate. As he was pushed through the doors and past the cells, the chatter of the prisoners completely ceased. It was so quiet Felix could hear his own heartbeat. All of his fellow “patients” were watching him the entire way down to his cell, probably shocked that he wasn’t dead.

Felix was carted into cell B-8 and dropped onto his bed. The attendant didn’t spare him a second glance before slipping out of the room, taking the wheelchair with him.

Surprisingly, Felix wasn’t all that tired. He expected his body to be exhausted after every visit to Dr. Hess, but this time, he left that navy blue room feeling energized. All he really wanted to do was talk to Rose and Kyuho. He still didn’t know them very well at all, but they both seemed trustworthy. They were the only people in this godforsaken place that acted like normal, adjusted human beings. Unfortunately, when Felix sat up, glancing towards the cells across from him, they were both empty. He couldn’t help but feel slightly panicked. He had no idea what was happening outside of this hallway, and it scared him. What if Dr. Hess was putting them through more “procedures”? What if he was pitting them against other prisoners in a fight to the death as some kind of sick entertainment? What if he deemed them useless and eliminated them the same way he threatened Felix when he first arrived?

The fears were bouncing around inside the Aussie’s head, but he halted them all with one thought. _It doesn’t matter what they’re doing to Rose and Kyuho because I can’t do anything to stop them._

Felix was trapped inside a room with three walls of stone and one wall of metal bars. The door was held shut with an electronic lock monitored by one of Dr. Hess’s loyal employees. The only possible weapon he had at his disposal was a mirror above the sink, but the sound of it shattering would attract every guard in the vicinity. Plus, he wasn’t even sure if the frame came off the wall or not. The freckled boy was completely helpless. He couldn’t even find a way out of his cell, much less the building itself.

Chan hyung would have a plan. Chan hyung would know what to do. The older Aussie always seemed to have some piece of advice for his younger members, no matter what the situation called for. He also watched a lot of horror movies, so he knew how to escape a crazy kidnapper. If he were in that cell with Felix, he would have already created an elaborate scheme to trick a guard into opening the door so they could attack him and steal his weapon. Then Seungmin would bluntly remind him that the guard would probably use the weapon to kill Chan before he was able to get a hold of it. Minho hyung would laugh at Chan’s dejected frown while Hyunjin and Jisung argued over who they would use as bait to lure the guard in. Seungmin would, again, point out that the guard is smarter than all of them and would realize something was amiss immediately. Of course, the two dimwits would ignore Seungmin and continue arguing. Jeongin, the baby, would watch the chaos with a cute little smile---a perfect, well-thought plan formulating in his brain. But, he would wait until his hyungs shut up long enough for him to share it.

Changbin hyung … Changbin hyung would walk over to Felix, knowing that the entire situation would be stressful for him. He would wrap his strong arms around the Aussie, holding him close and whispering reassurances into his ear until he relaxed. The rapper always seemed to know when Felix needed something as simple as a hug. _God,_ what he wouldn’t give to feel Changbin’s arms around him one last time, if only for a moment.

The Aussie shifted just slightly on his bed, leaning back into the stone behind him. He gasped as the two little bird wings brushed up against the wall, completely forgetting that they were there for a minute. It was such a foreign sensation to have entirely new appendages attached to his back, especially since they had appeared in less than a day. It wasn’t even something familiar, like an arm or a leg. The muscles and bones in the tiny wings behaved differently, forcing Felix to really concentrate if he wanted to move them a certain way.

He craned his neck to peek over his shoulder. They were still small and wimpy, but at least they weren’t completely naked. As Dr. Hess had so graciously pointed out, there were several feathers already in place and starting to grow. The feather shafts, or the part with which you write when using a quill, were imbedded in the skin. Felix assumed that the fluffy, light part of the feather would extend out from there as they got longer. He only had basic knowledge on birds, meaning that this whole wing situation would take a lot of getting used to. He would most likely have to learn to fly once his wings grew large enough. Usually, the Aussie would feel excited about being able to soar through the sky, but the fact that it was a direct result of excruciating tests ordered by the resident mad scientist took the fun out of it.

Felix wondered if Kyuho had gone through the same process. Of course, he had to if he had a pair of his own wings, but the doctor mentioned that it took much longer for his to develop. Was that the case with everyone in this damned facility? Or was Felix special for some reason? The doctor definitely seemed impressed with the Aussie’s ability to grow gross pink chicken wings out of his own back. Just another question to ask his two hallmates when they returned.

Having nothing better to do, Felix sighed, laying down on his bed. The wings were pressed up against the wall but the cool stone felt good on the new skin, so he didn’t try to adjust. The freckled boy resigned himself to counting the multiple spiders and flies exploring his room. As long as they didn’t get too close, he was content with sharing his cell with them. 

A couple hours and a few newly named spider friends later, Felix heard shuffling down the hallway. He didn’t think much of it; the other prisoners were probably playing soccer with a tuft of hair out of boredom again. He closed his eyes, trying to recall as many spider names as he could. He had Peter, Parker, Spooder, Natasha, Romanoff, Fury, Venom, Widow, Buddy, Soonie, Doongie, Dori, Kkami the Spider, Milton, Richard, Bokkie (who was the only little bugger that tried to land on his face), Elton, John, Miles, Undercover Spy-der, George---.

“Felix?!”

The boy jumped at the sudden voice, his wings twitching outwards and hitting the wall. He hissed, the new skin still extremely sensitive. When he opened his eyes, he almost cried in relief.

Rose and Kyuho were pressed up against the bars of their cells, staring at the idol with twin expressions of relief and shock. He was suddenly reminded of the last time they had seen him: all bloody and torn to pieces. He even passed out from exhaustion. They probably thought he was dead these past three days.

“We thought you were dead!”

Felix snorted.

“Well fortunately for you guys, I’m not. They just took me to one of the torture rooms to stitch me up.”

It seemed as if Rose’s whole body relaxed at his words. She looked like a major weight had been lifted off her shoulders. Kyuho, however, was frowning. Now that he was sure of Felix’s safety, he could voice a question he’d been pondering throughout the entirety of the idol's absence.

“Did the Doc say anything about your wings? Like, was he surprised that you sprouted so early?”

Felix nodded, “He asked if I had ever shown any signs of advanced development before. Did I build muscle faster and easier? Nope. Did any medication stop working quicker than it should when I took it? Nope. Did I sober up faster than the other members? Hell no. He just kept going on and on about how ‘proud’ he was and how I was his favorite patient and all that. The dude’s definitely got issues.”

“That’s an understatement.” Rose scoffed. She dropped to the floor, folding her legs and tail underneath her. Kyuho followed suit, the bottom half of both wings dragging on the ground.

“So he doesn’t know why your wings came in so early?” Kyuho tried to clarify, ignoring Rose’s sassy remark. His frown deepened. “That really worries me. Hess is going to stop at nothing to find out why the procedure worked so well with you in particular.”

“You’re telling me that this has never happened before? Ever?” Felix asked, disbelief evident in his voice. “He’s got all these different patients, and he’s never had someone turn all animal after a couple of hours?” When both Rose and Kyuho shook their heads, the Aussie felt his stomach turn. What was so special about _him_? Why does fate want him to be the main character in a YA novel so badly?

“Felix, listen to me,” Rose spoke, reaching a hand through the bars towards him. She acted as if she was calming a wild animal, which was ironic. “Dr. Dipshit is insane, that’s common knowledge. His experiments are mostly successful, but now that you’ve gone and blown his mind with your affinity for sprouting feathers, he’s going to be very interested in your progress. I mean, he might find something as you grow and the bird’s traits become more evident, but he might resort to … other methods of gathering information.” The freckled boy didn’t necessarily like the careful way Rose was choosing her words. On his side of the stone wall, Kyuho’s face was solemn. “I’m trying to say that Derek might conduct _tests_ on you to figure out why his serum worked so well. That’s why we’re so concerned. If you have any idea why this happened, you should tell him.”

Felix’s stomach twisted uncomfortably at the mention of tests, but his jaw dropped when he fully processed Rose’s suggestion.

“You want me to _help_ him?! Even if I knew why the serum worked so well, I wouldn’t say a word! That man is batshit crazy. I’m not going to give him another reason to go out and kidnap more innocent people.” Felix was fuming. It was bad enough that the doctor had so many prisoners at his disposal. Felix wasn’t going to help him ruin anymore lives.

Rose’s head hung low, and the Aussie could tell she was ashamed. He almost apologized, but he knew that he needed to stand by what he believed was right. Maybe Rose was just trying to protect him, but he wasn’t going to assist the doctor in continuing his horrific experiments.

“Felix,” Kyuho sighed. The man was obviously stressed, running his hands over his face. “Rose didn’t mean to offend you. She’s just worried---we both are. Whatever the Doc wants, he gets. We can’t really do anything to stop him. Our lives are entirely in his hands, which he definitely takes advantage of. In the past, he’s had patients that reacted to his serum differently than the rest. They developed new traits that the others with the same animal DNA didn’t. A few patients had traits that were stronger or more advanced than the rest. Every single time someone’s reaction to the procedures was inconsistent with the others, they were whisked away and never heard from again. The rest of us could only assume the worst. Felix, we don’t want to help him any more than you do, but we also don’t want you to disappear off the face of the earth like the other ‘anomalies’ did.”

The freckled boy felt nauseous at the thought of what _tests_ the doctor would have performed on those poor patients before him. He couldn’t believe this entire facility and all of the horrific things inside it was still a secret to the public. So many people have died within these walls yet no one noticed.

“Kid, you have amazing friends and a loving family waiting for you to come home,” Rose started, softly. Her eyes were warm and reassuring, somehow causing Felix to lose some of the tension set deep in his shoulders. Even his little wings drooped slightly. “You’re the only one in this goddamn place that has a promising future. We want to help you, but we can’t if you …” She didn’t finish her thought, but it wasn’t necessary. Felix could fill in the blanks. “So, you have to try your damned hardest to get out of here. Even though we’re both complete strangers and probably some of the weirdest people you’ve ever met, we’ll be by your side every step of the way. Okay?”

She had a point. The Aussie has only known Rose and Kyuho for less than a day, if one excluded the time he was unconscious, but he couldn’t fight the tears building behind his eyes. He felt, deep down in his gut, that he could trust the two individuals in front of him despite knowing little to nothing about them. Rose promised that they would be there for him, no matter what, and he believed her. When he met her eyes, he only saw honesty. From the other side of the wall, Kyuho shot him a little smile that reminded the boy of Chan hyung---comforting and kind.

“Okay.”

Somewhere, Felix felt something click into place, knowing immediately that he had made the right decision. He realized that he already trusted his new companions with something incredibly important---his life.

“But you’re wrong.”

The heartwarming atmosphere was shattered as the words left his mouth. Rose arched an eyebrow. Kyuho’s face crumpled in confusion.

“You two are definitely not the weirdest people I’ve ever met,” he shrugged, trying and failing to hide his grin.

Kyuho just rolled his eyes with a fond snort. Rose’s face lit up as she challenged, “Oh yeah?”

“Yeah.”

“Enlighten me, dear freckled child, who have you met has surpassed me as the strangest person you’ve encountered? Who has defeated me and stolen my title?”

Felix pinched his lips together, but giggled anyway. “My dear Rosie, you never held the title to begin with.”

Kyuho sighed, already knowing what was to come. He leaned forward, allowing his head to hit the bars. He seemed comfortable there, despite the metal digging into his forehead.

“How dare?! How _dare_ you claim such blasphemy? I’ll have you know I take pride in my unique personality. It is impossible for one to be weirder than yours truly! Completely impossible!!!” Rose declared, gasping in mock outrage. As she went on, her red hair bounced and swished, giving it the illusion of dancing flames on her head. She was an energetic, bright person by nature, and Felix imagined what would happen if she ever met his Sunshine Twin, the one and only Han Jisung. The world would end, most likely.

“Why yes, my lady,” the Aussie began, his expression smug. “When I first arrived at the renowned JYP Entertainment, I was introduced to a man unlike any other. Only a few years older than myself, he was an esteemed dancer and had the envy of all the other trainees. What they didn’t know, was that the man was gifted with an extremely 4D personality.”

Rose scooted closer to the bars, still keeping up her offended act. Although, now she seemed truly interested. Kyuho too, perked up a little.

“Tell me, young man. Tell me his name!”

Felix paused for dramatic effect. He waited until he saw the redhead’s eye twitch with impatience before revealing the name.

“The man is called Lee Minho, or Lee Know to his fans, and he is the only one of his kind.”

Rose giggled, and Kyuho’s smile could melt the ice caps. They both watched Felix intently, waiting for him to continue. He was surprised at how invested they actually were in his little spiel.

“You mustn’t stop there!” Kyuho joined in, his voice lifted high in disbelief. “I must hear more about this man called Lee Minho. How is he more unique than a furry---er, woman with a tail?!”

Rose opened her mouth, most likely to call Kyuho out for his jab, but shut it just as quickly once Felix started talking again.

“Well, the man is an enigma. He dances like the wind in one moment, beautiful and awe-inspiring. In the next, he’s screaming like a banshee for absolutely no reason and taking disgusting selcas. If anyone dares to insult or forget one of his cat babies, he treats them like the garbage they are.”

“Did you do that once?” Rose interrupted, eyes staring at him knowingly.

Felix felt his face flush, “Shut up.”

Kyuho laughed from deep in his chest and Rose cackled like a witch. They took a few minutes to calm down, Felix pouting the entire time.

“Sorry, sorry,” Kyuho breathed. “Keep going.”

Felix felt his own smile grow as he thought back to all the memories he had with Minho and his other members. One in particular caught his attention.

“Well, I can remember a couple months back, when Minho hyung decided to buy a ‘realistic cat costume’ online. He thought it would help him form closer bonds with his cats, but all it did was scar the younger members for life …”

Three hours later, Felix found himself curled up on his mattress, his mind still swimming with fond memories and funny stories courtesy of his two new companions. They had talked and laughed until they couldn’t hold their eyes open much longer, prompting them to retire to their beds. Even as the freckled boy shuffled and squirmed under the blankets, trying to find a comfortable position that incorporated his fluffy baby bird wings, he couldn’t wipe the smile off his face.

For the first time since he woke up on Dr. Hess’s cold metal table, Felix didn’t want the overwhelming darkness to swallow him whole. He knew it was stupid---maybe even dangerous---but he felt a tiny glimmer of hope bloom in his chest. All alone, there was no way he could escape the doctor’s maniacal clutches. With a couple allies … ? Maybe, just maybe, the young Aussie would find his friends and family again.

Maybe he would feel Changbin’s arms wrap around him, never to let go.

Maybe he would survive.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> See? It wasnt so bad this week! Felix is a strong bub that would never help a crazy scientist with his schemes but Rose and Kyuho just want to protect him  
> In the upcoming chapter, you will read about how the members are taking the news that their beloved Aussie bro has been kidnapped as well as Felix's actual family making a visit to JYPE ...  
> Hope you enjoyed and thank you for reading!!!


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Felix's family arrives.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello~  
> I'm back with another wild ride of angst upon angst!  
> It's a shorter chapter, and i remember that it took me a while to write, but I don't completely hate it ... so let's hope you guys don't either!  
> Thank you for reading!!!

Collectively, the members and detectives decided it would be best to wait until Felix’s family arrived to announce the press release. They would all be on the next flight from Australia to South Korea, which would be landing in a few hours.

Knowing that word would get out eventually, JYP had sent a detailed email to a good majority of his employees, idols, and trainees explaining the situation and asking them kindly to keep the news within the company. If they had any questions, they were to come to him.

Meanwhile, the Stray Kids members had resigned themselves to occasionally posting on social media and hiding in the studio together with the intention of getting some work done. They didn’t want to fall behind with their next album, but they just didn’t have the motivation to complete it without their brother at their side. Changbin and Jisung were reviewing their rap verses with Hyunjin while the two youngest attended their vocal lessons. Minho disappeared into the dance studio, the only sign he was still alive being the loud, banging music bleeding through the walls. Chan thrust himself into recording and writing as many songs as he could but quickly found that he hated everything he was producing. It all sounded too rushed, too jumbled, too overbearing. None of the beats meshed well with anything he added, and the only lyrics that came to mind were depressing and panicky, most likely influenced by Felix’s absence. Chan’s hair was tangled from how many times he ran his fingers through it.

The Stray Kids leader was trying to toss another crumpled up page of rejected lyrics in the bin when he heard a light knock on his door. He paused long enough to call the person in. The crumpled page bounced off the growing pile of paper balls currently filling the trash bin at the exact moment that Seungmin poked his head into the room.

Chan sat with a grimace as he watched Seungmin's eyes drift from the overflowing trash bin to the discarded paper ball on the floor before finally resting on Chan in his disheveled state. He just watched the Aussie for a few moments, making him squirm in his seat.

Eventually, he just sighed. His expression seemed torn. He obviously wanted to say something, knowing full well that Chan was taking Felix's disappearance harder than anyone---except maybe Changbin---but he didn't. Unfortunately, he had a reason for visiting, and he couldn't stop to have a much needed chat with his hyung.

"Felix's family is here."

As soon as he heard of their arrival, Chan had hopped up from his chair and followed Seungmin down the hallway. He tried patting his hair flat as he walked, not wanting the rest of the members to see that the stress was starting to affect him. He noticed Seungmin's sad gaze on his face and let his arms drop to his side.

He would be lying if he said he wasn't nervous. Felix's family had allowed their son, their brother, to move to Korea with the belief that he would be in capable hands---that he would be protected. Chan had not only failed Felix, but he failed his entire family too. He had let the younger boy walk the streets of Seoul alone, and now he was at the mercy of whatever sick fuck snatched him away. Chan would completely understand if Felix's family hated him for it, but that didn't mean it would hurt any less.

As they neared the boardroom where Felix's family and the rest of Stray Kids were waiting, Seungmin grabbed Chan's hand in an attempt to give him some sort of stability. Outside of the dorms, the young vocalist rarely took part in any skinship, so the gesture was much appreciated and allowed Chan to clear his muddled thoughts. The two boys hesitated in front of the door long enough for the Aussie to take a deep breath. Then, they entered the room.

Chan wasn't sure what he had been expecting, but it definitely wasn't the screaming match that was currently playing out in front of him.

Fortunately for the Stray Kids leader, the shouting wasn't being directed at him. Instead, the founder of JYP Entertainment was facing the full brunt of a terrified mother's rage.

"I trusted you! I trusted this company! I trusted that my son would be safe---that he would have someone watching over him to make sure he's healthy and eating properly. I thought that the only thing I had to worry about was crazy fans and overexertion, but I was obviously wrong! My son is _gone_! He's somewhere in this god forsaken country with the monsters that kidnapped him, and it's all your fault!" A woman in her mid-forties was leaning over the long table, her face red from shouting. She stood directly across from JYP as he sat silently, his face devoid of emotion. Beside the woman, a man around the same age was seated. He had cropped black hair and deep laugh lines. His eyes appeared kind but were rimmed with red, hinting that he had been crying recently. He sat with two girls: a mature looking young woman around Chan's age, and a teenager with tears streaming down her face. 

They all shared some kind of resemblance with a certain freckled Aussie, whether it was the nose, the eyes, or the smile. There was no doubt that this was the Lee family, and they were pissed.

"I was even informed by the detectives themselves that you requested the investigation and missing person report be kept private, out of the public eye," the woman---Felix's mother---fumed. "Are you seriously so selfish that you were more concerned about your company's reputation than my own son's safety?! The other members told you it was unusual for him to get lost. They told you they were worried, yet you completely ignored them. You don't even care what they're doing to Felix! You just want this all to be over with so you can move on and kick it under the rug, as if it never ever happened in the first place. You disgust me."

Chan and Seungmin had shuffled further into the room, over to the side of the door they had walked through. The rest of the members were all lined up against the wall, watching the fierce exchange with wide eyes. They seemed invested in the scolding but were too scared to get any closer. Whether they were actually afraid of provoking Mrs. Lee’s wrath or just wanted to see JYP get lectured a while longer, Chan wasn’t sure. He was more than content with standing in the corner and watching it all unfold, though.

Unfortunately, Chan’s plans to stay out of sight proved futile. The younger girl, maybe fifteen or sixteen years of age, peeked over her shoulder at him, eyes lighting up with recognition. She turned back to her father and whispered something in his ear. Chan’s stomach dropped when Mr. Lee immediately repeated his daughter’s message to his wife.

Felix’s mom straightened until she stood upright, her eyes flicking around the room. As they landed on Chan, her face shifted into something unreadable. The Stray Kids leader took a step forward and did the only thing that he could think of.

Chan dropped to his knees and folded himself in half, bowing as low as he could physically manage. He knew the gesture would not bring Felix back, but it would at least express his remorse over the whole situation. He should’ve kept a better eye on his little Aussie bro because now it was too late.

Chan felt movement and heard the shuffling of feet beside him. He didn’t have to look to know that the other members were following his lead, kneeling and bowing deeply. They felt just as responsible as Chan did, even though they had no reason to. They weren’t supposed to keep track of their bandmates at all times. They weren’t supposed to protect each other from harm. That was Chan’s job. He was the leader, and he failed.

His voice was most likely muffled with his head resting on the floor, but Chan tried to speak anyway. “Mrs. Lee, I am so sorry. I was trusted with the task of watching over your son, and I’ve failed. I should’ve been more concerned with the idea of him traveling alone, especially at night, but I let him go anyway. If I had just sent someone with him, he might still be here with us. It was my responsibility to keep him safe, and I f-failed.” Chan’s voice broke towards the end, his emotions overwhelming him for a moment. He had so much more to say, so many more useless apologies, but he was stopped by a gentle hand on his back.

“Stand up, please. All of you.”

Chan hesitated. Felix’s mother didn’t sound the least bit angry, which confused him, but he wasn’t one to look a gift horse in the mouth. He pulled himself to his feet, the rest of the members following his lead. Despite her gentle tone of voice, Chan still refused to meet Mrs. Lee’s eye. He didn’t want to find disgust and disappointment in her gaze.

“Christopher, please. _Look at me_.” She whispered, her request spoken in crystal clear english.

Chan clenched his eyes shut tight in a last ditch effort to steel himself before _finally_ lifting his chin to meet Mrs. Lee’s stare.

As soon as her face was in full view, Mrs. Lee’s unreadable expression melted into a truly proud gaze. She studied the man in front of her---the man who was there for her son and supported him when she wasn’t able to---and let a warm smile show through. “ _There he is_.”

Chan swallowed the lump in his throat. It was becoming increasingly more difficult to maintain his strong facade. The longer Felix’s mother watched him with a look of overwhelming love and admiration that only a mother can achieve, the quicker his walls began to crumble. It reminded him of his own mom, with her gentle caresses and soft kisses, and the thought caused his lip to tremble. He didn’t deserve this. He didn’t deserve Mrs. Lee’s adoration.

Slowly, Mama Lee brought her hand up to cup Chan’s cheek. Her palm was calloused, but it was warm, and the leader couldn’t help but lean into it. She used her thumb to stroke under his eye, where deep bags had begun to form due to several nights of little to no sleep. A stray tear slipped down her cheek, and Chan was shocked as he realized it had been shed for him.

“ _My dear boy_ ,” the woman started. Her words were spoken in english, obviously directed towards the Australian native. “ _How many nights have you spent blaming yourself for all of this? How many days have you hidden your pain from your brothers? How long have you suffered alone?_ ”

Chan let out a whimper, his eyes squeezing shut instinctively. It was barely audible, but the other members picked up on it immediately, their attention fixed on their leader. Mrs. Lee heard it too.

Another tear fell down her cheek, and she nodded her head ruefully.

“ _Christopher, you have the largest, most caring heart of anyone I have ever met. You put others before yourself no matter what the situation is or what you’re experiencing. My son speaks of you as if you hung the stars in the sky, you know. You inspire him to be better, to live up to his potential. You guided him when he was lost. I know what kind of person you are, my child, and I am forever grateful that my son found you. I think now it’s time you bring down those walls and let us in. Let us_ help _you, because you deserve it. I don’t blame you for what happened to my son. No one blames you, except yourself. You have nothing to fear. It’s time you realize that. It’s time you realize you’re not alone._ ”

Gently, Mama Lee gathered the boy into her arms. For the first time since Felix disappeared, Chan felt safe. It was enough to bring what remained of his walls crashing down, and the man allowed himself to truly feel what he had been experiencing on the inside since losing his brother: grief, fear, pain. It all rushed through him like a tidal wave. He had been fighting to keep a strong exterior in order to reassure his members that they would be okay. He was their anchor, and he felt as if he needed to show them that he was unaffected. He was their shoulder to cry on, their steadfast rock in a surging ocean. He needed to remain strong when the others couldn’t.

But now, he was allowed to feel.

And he did.

Chan tucked his head into Mama Lee’s shoulder, wrapped his arms firmly around her, leaned into her warmth, and let go. He broke down, tears cascading down his face as he sobbed harder than he ever had before. His shoulders and body shook with the force of it. His knees became weak, and his legs started to tremble. Mama Lee easily lowered them both to the floor, stroking his hair and holding him steady the entire time. Chan was gasping for breath in between silent sobs. He clutched at the back of Mama Lee’s shirt like it was a lifeline.

Memories of the members all together passed through his mind: the time they first met, their first practice as eight, their first meal as eight, the day they were told they would debut as eight, that time Jisung somehow got himself stuck in a vending machine and the members had to deface JYPE property to get him out. Chan remembered each memory as if it had just happened the day before.

Chan cried for Felix, their lost brother who was most likely terrified and alone. He cried for the Lee family, who had sacrificed so much for Felix to follow his dreams only to see him snatched from their grasp. He cried for his members, who lost someone they grew to love like family. He cried for the Stay, many of whom viewed Felix as a source of happiness in their lives---happiness that had been stolen from them. Most importantly, he cried for himself. For the first time in a while, he wasn’t hiding his emotions like they were abnormal. He allowed himself to feel, to hurt, to give in. He didn’t have to pretend like everything was okay because it wasn’t. Now, Chan knew that. He finally understood that he didn’t have to suffer alone.

And as he held Mama Lee in a vice-like grip, as he felt the rest of his members kneel beside them and join them in their embrace, Chan thanked whatever deity that existed out there for leading him to his forever family.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So ... that was fun ha ha  
> At this point, some of you might think I hate the boys lol  
> I swear I don't! I love them too much and I would never wish any of this pain on them!!! It just makes for an interesting story!  
> I'm sorry if it seems like I updated a little late. I was writing a 3 out of 5 pages in my essay for english thats due tomorrow and finishing up a lot of other homework. Plus, I was celebrating my birthday with my family and I almost forgot about updating altogether!  
> Regardless, I hope you enjoyed reading and thank you for stopping by!!!


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Felix reveals how he copes with captivity. He finally stands up to the Doctor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello~~  
> Sorry about the wait. I forgot to upload this chapter a couple days ago and never got around to it until today. It's not even that great of a chapter lol  
> I don't know what I was thinking when I wrote this. It's basically word vomit thrown together to slightly resemble a filler chapter lol  
> I hope you enjoy it anyways!!! :)

The next couple of days passed slowly for Felix. He was left in his cell with nothing to do but watch as Rose and Kyuho were led out of their own cells and down the hallway by a zombie-like assistant until he couldn’t see them any longer. They were usually only gone for a few hours before reappearing again, so Felix didn’t worry too much, but he was curious. Whenever he asked what happened on the other side of those double doors, they always said something about “training.” He didn’t try to push for answers because he could tell they were exhausted; he just let his imagination run wild.

At first he pictured them sparring other patients in some padded gym room---like one would see in the movies---but quickly realized it was a stupid idea. Why would Dr. Hess teach his own prisoners how to fight? He may be demented, but he was smart enough to know that none of his patients were locked in his facility willingly and would use every tool at their disposal to escape. If he taught them how to fight, they would employ their new skills to get as far away from him as possible.

Felix settled on the idea that Dr. Hess was trying to teach his patients to use their animal traits. Kyuho’s wings were useless unless he learned how to fly. Rose probably didn’t know the full capabilities of her heightened leopard senses until someone told her how to access them. Of course, the patients could still use their new abilities to attempt a jailbreak, but what good was an animal-human hybrid if they didn’t know how to apply the animal part of their biology?

It took several days before Felix noticed the thin metal collars wrapped snugly around the other patients’ necks. Rose and Kyuho didn’t wear them whenever they were chilling in their cells, but as soon as those barred doors swung open, they would pull the flimsy devices out from under their beds and clasp them at the base of their throats. The freckled boy could only assume that they were some kind of restraint to prevent the patients from hightailing it out of this damned facility. For a moment, he wondered why he had never been forced to wear one, but then he remembered every time he had been outside of his cell, he had been the human equivalent of a ragdoll.

Currently, Felix was supposed to stay in his cell to heal. It was boring as hell, the only upside being the fact that he could tell how much time had passed, even as he sat in a windowless room. The zombie assistants brought him three meals a day. He shared his breakfast and dinner with Rose and Kyuho, but lunch was always eaten alone. The food wasn’t terrible, either. It wasn’t stale, rotten, or mushy. _But_ , it was the same three meals every single day. By the time he got out of this place, he wouldn’t be able to stomach samgyetang ever again.

In addition to the scheduled meals, Felix could tell when a new day began because of the facility’s nightly procedures. Fortunately for everyone locked inside, the lights were shut off every evening and turned back on in the morning. Felix personally believed they came back on way too early, but at least he was able to keep track of his days. According to his calculations, he had already spent a week and a half in Dr. Hess’s mad scientist lab---including the times he was unconscious. Since then, his first few feathers had finished growing, and he had sprouted several more feather shafts. The gross pink skin on his wings would be completely covered by fluff in another week at this rate.

The Australian native had taken to stretching his little wings when he got up in the morning. It was still a strange sensation to be using muscles that hadn’t even existed before the purple serum entered his body, but he was slowly becoming accustomed to it. He began by standing as straight as possible without losing his balance---which happened much more often since he gained the two new appendages---and gently extending the wings as far as they would reach. Then, he gave a few weak flaps and retracted them back towards his body.

The first few days he tried it, the skin around his shoulders burned. The still healing skin bled where the stitches were embedded, and a nurse had to come in and clean the wound. Later that day, Kyuho gave him a stern lecture about taking it easy and letting his body recover. Eventually, though, the pain faded, and he gave another attempt at moving his wings. He was pleasantly surprised to feel nothing but a slight twinge in the area. Ever since, it had become a part of his daily routine.

For ten minutes every morning, Felix stretched his baby wings and tried some yoga poses. It helped to wake him up and keep his mind occupied. Then, the idol would chat with Rose and Kyuho for an hour or two until they were whisked away. After that, he improvised.

Felix wasn’t ashamed to admit he was easily amused. He had the attention span of a walnut, so he jumped from one activity to another very often. Usually, he had his hyungs to help him focus, but now he was left to his own devices. For the first few days, he tested himself to see how many of his little spider friends he could remember. Then, he moved on to naming flies, which was much more difficult because they kept flying out of his cell. When he grew bored of naming things, he began dancing.

Whatever song popped into his head became his inspiration for an hour. He attempted the choreo for Blackpink songs, Seventeen songs, EXO songs, BTS songs, GOT7 songs, NCT songs, Mamamoo songs, Red Velvet songs, and, of course, Twice songs. If he didn’t know the choreography, he created his own. He refused to use his own group’s music because the moves were all ingrained into his brain. They came to him through muscle memory, easier than breathing. It was unchallenging, and, by extension, painfully boring.

When it became difficult to recall songs, he switched to beats. He invented his own music with the sounds around him: the patient tapping their foot down the hall, the door lock beeping from somewhere in the building, the plastic cutlery clicking against the trays around lunchtime, the heart pounding in his chest. Anything that kept a steady beat worked perfectly.

Indeed, even the sounds started to get annoyingly repetitive after a few days, so Felix adapted yet again. He took a deep breath and blocked everything out: every sound, every tune, every word. He concentrated until all he could hear was silence. Then, he danced.

He twirled, twisted, stomped, dipped, and popped. To the outside looking in, he had no rhythm. He wasn’t following a tempo or a beat. He must’ve appeared downright insane.

He didn’t really care.

In fact, the truth was just the opposite.

Moving his body kept his mind from melting. It was the only way he could actually stay sane. When he sat still, the stone walls started to close in. When he counted spiders or flies, his eyes drifted until they stared at nothing. He didn’t dare escape to his imagination; ever since he first woke up in Dr. Hess’ facility, his thoughts started wandering into darker territory. If he let it run wild, his imagination would trap him in an endless loop of “what if’s” and “why’s.” At times like this, his mind was working against him.

So, he danced and danced until his breath was difficult to recover. His eyes were closed the entire time, just his instincts preventing him from crashing into the wall or the bed. In a way, it was peaceful. The silence in his mind wasn’t terrifying like it usually would be. It reminded him of that dark void he would drift into during the procedure: his safe place. Now that the procedure was over, Felix didn’t think of the void very often. He was glad that he no longer felt the need to escape to it and not look back. He never wanted to experience that kind of desperation again. Now, Felix relied on his new companions and the comforting quiet to keep him at ease during his stay in the mad scientist's lab.

It was during one of his soundless performances for an invisible audience that Dr. Hess finally decided to make his next appearance.

Felix’s movements came to a halt as soon as the tapping of shoes broke his carefully constructed silence. They were moving rapidly, coming closer to where Felix was locked up. He stood still and waited as the person producing the noise came into view.

Felix found himself staring straight into the eyes of a grinning Dr. Hess once again. It was truly unfortunate that his cheerful face had started to become a familiar sight.

“Felix!” he laughed, looking as if he had just discovered the Fountain of Youth. “You seem to be doing much better than the last time we spoke.” He stood directly in front of the door of the cell, so close that Felix could reach out and yank the doctor’s head into the bars if he wanted to.

“I tend to feel better when you’re not around,” the freckled boy shot back, his whole body tense as he watched the doctor warily.

Dr. Hess chuckled lowly, apparently amused by Felix’s retort. “I’m almost certain that my absence wasn’t a factor in your ability to heal. But, I have to admit, you recovered quicker than I predicted. Perhaps your daily stretches and exercise played a part.”

Felix was shocked. _How the hell did he know what I was doing_? He wondered. The thought that the doctor was constantly watching him was terrifying and extremely disturbing, but he didn’t want to let the doctor see how much the revelation had affected him.

“I was trying to keep my sanity. It’s easy to lose your mind when you’re locked in a cage like an animal.”

Finally, Dr. Hess’s bright smile faded from his face, and he sighed. He rubbed at his chin, suddenly looking ten years older.

“This is not a cell, Felix. It is your own room in which you are to live during your time here at the facility. I personally ensured the furniture in each room is comfortable and the food you eat is nutritious,” he claimed. Felix scoffed in disbelief. This man actually thought he was taking great care of his victims, all of whom he had kidnapped from the street. His tired tone of voice gave Felix the impression that he had made this particular speech several times for his other prisoners. “Besides, at this point, you _are_ an animal compared to your average human being.”

Felix couldn’t control the rage that built in his chest. It rose quickly, drowning out all logical thought and caution.

“Who made me that way?! Who stole me from my friends and family to run experiments without my fucking consent?! _You_ did! _You’re_ the reason I’m part animal! You have no right to keep me captive for your own fucking amusement!” he cried, taking a threatening step forward with every accusation. His feet had taken him right up to the metal bars as he continued to glare at Dr. Hess with all the fury he could muster, chest heaving with the force of his words. The doctor’s expression had gone blank, and he studied the Aussie boy carefully.

For an extremely tense moment, the two men just watched each other. Neither of them were willing to relent, creating a standoff of some sort.

Finally, Dr. Hess tilted his head to the side, eyes never leaving Felix. Minhee, who had been hidden behind his shoulder the entire time, appeared with her clipboard.

“Have Yunkwan fetch Felix here a neckband. I thought we wouldn’t need one, but I’d rather not take any chances.”

Felix continued glaring, even as Dr. Hess broke the stalemate by turning his attention to his assistant. His eyes bore holes into the annoyingly pristine lab coat as the brute called Yunkwan came into view carrying a thin metal band that was all too familiar. He scrutinized the lack of emotion on the disturbed man’s face while Yunkwan entered the cell and secured the collar around his throat. Felix refused to stop tracking the doctor’s every move until he disappeared from view, striding down the hallway with Minhee at his heels and pushing through the large double doors.

With his source of anger gone, Felix let his shoulders slump and his wings droop. He released a long, defeated sigh. He knew his little meltdown was stupid. Dr. Hess had behaved as if he was going to let Felix out of his cell without the metal collar, but the boy had acted out. Now, the doctor was wary of him, and he knew the collar was going to make an appearance every time he left his cell.

He wondered what something as small as the neckband could really do to keep him under control. Despite his curiosity, however, the freckled boy wasn’t too keen on testing it out.

So, when Yunkwan gripped his arm in one of his calloused hands and pushed him towards the open cell door, Felix followed along without any resistance. He let the rough man guide him down the hallway and towards the exit Dr. Hess had used only minutes prior.

At the back of his mind, the idol was panicking, trying to guess where they were taking him and why. On the outside, he could very well be mistaken for one of the zombie-like assistants with his lack of emotion. He had made a mistake by letting his fear and frustration overwhelm his judgement, but it wouldn’t happen again. He also wasn’t about to show the doctor just how terrified he truly was. Who knows what the man would do with that kind of information.

As Felix was escorted towards the tall steel doors, he took a large breath of air. No matter what they did to him, no matter how much pain he was subjected to, he would come out on the other side stronger and more resilient. He had to---for the sake of his friends, his family, and his two new companions. He would be strong for them.

He would survive for them.

He would see them again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Was it as bad as I made it out to be? Lol I hope you guys liked it.  
> This was the last chapter that I had written already so I will be writing the rest of this story from scratch. It might take me longer than a week to write each chapter, depending on the amount of school work I have or how much I work on it. In other words, the updates will be sporadic from now on. I hope you don't mind.  
> In the next chapter, we'll see Stray Kids' next step in the search for Felix: informing the media :)  
> Again, thank you so much for reading!!!


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The members, detectives, and JYP conduct a press conference to inform the public of Felix's kidnapping.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!
> 
> I'm back! I cannot describe just how frustrating and hectic these past few weeks have been. I would explain, but I feel like you guys don't want to hear me complain because we're ALL being screwed by this stupid virus. However, I'm also not gonna talk about corona because youre all probably hearing way too much about it everyday so i dont want to add to it.
> 
> Anyway, lemme just say, this chapter is real boring yet angsty and necessary (imo) and i thought it was at least 2000 words longer than it is so its definitely not my favorite thing ever. BUT IM FINALLY FINISHED so here it is!
> 
> To those of you who are still here lol thank you so much for sticking around!!!

Chan had only experienced this level of anxiety a couple times before in his life: every time he was forced to make all new friends at an entirely new school after his family moved to a different neighborhood, when he filmed and sent his audition to JYPE, the several month long wait before he found out he had been accepted, when JYP himself decided whether Stray Kids would debut as eight or not, and, of course, the moment Minho handed him a shattered phone with a koala case.

Chan was usually very calm and collected. He adopted his chill mentality in his early teens, right as his classes started to become challenging. His friends and family always asked him how he kept such a level head, but he didn’t have an answer. The truth was that he _did_ experience anxiety and stress. He worried about his grades and felt pressured to act a certain way in order to fit in, just like every other kid his age.

Unlike his peers, however, Chan was one step ahead of his rollercoaster emotions. Whenever he started to feel like he was drowning in his concerns, he stopped and tried to clear his mind. He played soothing music and breathed deeply. He kicked around a soccer ball with his little brother and threw a ball for his dog. He always made sure to sit back and relax, regardless of what was weighing on his mind.

He was like an island of tranquility in a raging ocean. Because of this, the rest of the members would seek him out when they were falling victim to their stress. He was proud that his members felt like they could rely on him when their insecurities and fears overwhelmed them, and he did his very best to help them calm down enough to talk it out. It was his responsibility as their leader, their friend, and their brother.

Currently, his anxiety was threatening to engulf him whole.

He was standing with his members in the lobby of the new JYPE building. They all seemed nervous---tapping their feet, playing with their fingers, rocking back and forth on their heels---but it was nothing compared to Chan. He was sweating profusely (gross) and kept running his hands through his already mussed up hair. He noticed the worried and slightly terrified looks he was receiving from his brothers as they weren’t used to seeing him like this. His condition was only made worse by the occasional rise in volume or camera flash from beyond the glass doors.

What seemed like hundreds of reporters and their camera crews were crowded around the front of the building. They mostly spoke quiet enough that those inside couldn’t hear them, but whenever one of the members came a little too close to the windows, the large group of press took the form of predators stalking their prey. They stopped speaking and watched their target with ravenous eyes, waiting for the moment to attack and sink their teeth into a nice, juicy story. Chan felt like a piece of meat dangling above the heads of starving wolves. Eventually, he suggested to his members that they retreat further into the lobby, where they weren’t completely surrounded with glass. Twenty minutes had passed since then, and even Changbin was getting impatient.

“Their meeting must’ve gone over. I’m sure they’ll be down any minute,” the rapper muttered, his voice tight with anxiety and not at all reassuring. Perhaps due to his obvious distress, the Yongin native had taken to cuddling Jeongin with all his might. The maknae was barely visible from where his face was smooshed into Changbin’s chest.

Chan couldn’t help but question Changbin’s forced optimism. From the many stories Felix had told about his family, and his mother in particular, they could rant for hours if the subject was something they were passionate about. At the moment, the members were waiting for the Lee family to finish a conference with Manager hyung, JYP, and the two detectives assigned to Felix’s case. Chan had no doubt in his mind that Mrs. Lee was going to squeeze every single piece of information out of those detectives. At the same time, she’ll manage to berate the company founder every chance she gets. In other words, the meeting will take a while.

Chan tried to gain some control in the situation, the responsible leader within him making an appearance. “How about we run through what’s about to happen and what we all need to cover once we get out there? You can never be too prepared.”

The other members seemed to ponder the idea, looking a little confused as they did so. After a few moments, Hyunjin hesitantly spoke up.

“Hyung, we don’t necessarily have to say anything. The only one talking out there is going to be you.”

Chan’s mouth formed a little “o” when the dancer’s words hit him and he realized the boy was right. Jisung snickered at his leader’s face, but Minho quickly quieted him by knocking him in the ribs with an elbow.

“Doesn’t matter,” the Aussie native decided. He held his chin up high to mask any embarrassment he felt. “I need to understand what I’m going to be talking about out there, and I need you guys to know what I have to cover so that you can subtly kick me in the foot if I’m going off topic. Okay?”

Chan scanned the faces of the boys in front of him, searching for any signs of bewilderment or indifference. Finding none, he continued.

“So, when we walk out, the cameras are going to go insane, the reporters are going to start yelling shit, and we just have to worry about lining up beside Mrs. Lee, who will be standing behind JYP, who will be next to the two detectives. Our order doesn’t matter, so figure out where you want to be in advance. Then, the detectives will step forward to address the reporters, and they’ll give a brief explanation of what this press release will be about. I’m up next, and I will describe what Felix was wearing at the time and where the cameras last spotted him.” At the mention of Felix, the room seemed to dim a small bit. Chan kept his voice and expression even in an attempt to placate his members, but he knew it would be five times as difficult to do the same out in front of all those reporters. “I’ll include every detail that might be significant to those searching for him. JYP will address what steps the company is taking towards ensuring their idols’ safety and how the public can aid in the search. Finally, Mrs. Lee will stand and make a plea to the kidnappers, asking them to bring Felix home safe and sound. The detectives will come forward to take questions, which will be a while, and then we head back inside to collapse and die on the sofas. Did I miss anything?”

“You promised to buy us all takeout afterwards because you love us and want us to be happy,” Jeongin muttered into Changbin’s chest, a small smile finding its way to his face. Chan’s heart melted at the sight.

“Oh, of course, Innie. I’m sorry I forgot. I’ll make sure to pay for plenty of takeout for all you guys because … wait.”

As the leader cooed at their youngest, the rest of the members had done their very best to keep the laughter from escaping their lips. They all watched, entranced, as Jeongin worked his magic, practically turning Chan into a gooey, whipped mess that was more than willing to dip into his wallet to keep Jeongin happy. The moment their leader caught on to the scheme, the boys burst into loud cackles. There were tears, and there were a few overdramatic members (read: Hyunjin and Jisung) who ended up clutching onto the nearest person like a lifeline in order to keep their bodies upright. The nerves running through everyone’s system seemed to be the cause of the excessive laughter, leaving the members struggling to collect themselves.

Chan mimed kicking Hyunjin and Jisung for their overzealous reactions, but the smile overtaking his features reassured that there was no malice behind it. Once the members calmed down, and the noise level dropped, Chan turned his revenge on the youngest.

“Oh, Innie!” He called. Jeongin immediately slipped out of Changbin’s grasp and twisted around to hug him from behind, placing the rapper in between him and Chan. That didn’t deter the Aussie native, though. “Come here, my little baby! I just wanna pinch your cheekies!”

“No!” Jeongin screeched, giggling from where he was attached to Changbin’s back. “Not my cheekies!”

Suddenly, Chan bolted towards the maknae, giving him no time to flee. Jeongin tried to keep Changbin between them, but the rapper was uncooperative and refused to move no matter how hard Jeongin tugged on his arm. Chan feigned to the left before ducking to the right. He maneuvered around Changbin easily, almost as if the rapper was subtly helping him reach the maknae.

In an instant, Chan stood in front of Jeongin, grinning down at him like a madman. The youngest was helpless as his hyung’s hands slowly rose up to reach his face. He accepted his fate, closing his eyes and pouting pathetically. Chan snickered and gently gripped his baby’s smooth cheeks in between his index finger and thumb. He squealed in delight as he stretched the skin outwards and upwards. He stood and played with Jeongin’s poor face to his heart’s content. When he eventually stopped, Jeongin’s cheekies were bright red from both the embarrassment and the prolonged pinching. The other members cooed at the sight, and the deep red blush grew darker.

Someone cleared their throat behind the group, effectively breaking them of their maknae-loving trance. Chan spun around and was greeted by Mama Lee’s amused smile. Behind her, Mr. Lee stood with his two daughters. JYP and the detectives had also appeared and were speaking in hushed tones several feet away. Chan turned his attention back to Felix’s mother.

Her gaze drifted to the reporters still bunched together outside, her eyes hardening.

“Let’s go face the wolves, shall we?”

The sudden wave of flashing lights and shouted questions was disorienting, to say the least. Chan felt Seungmin’s hand clasp the back of his winter coat like a lifeline as they waddled alongside Mrs. Lee. The moment everyone was settled into position---the Stray Kids members lined up beside Mrs. Lee and JYP with the two detectives standing slightly before them at the podium---the press release began.

“Good afternoon, everyone,” Detective Minjun started. His face betrayed nothing, but the tension in his shoulders and the firm grip he had on the side of the podium led Chan to believe that he was not a big fan of public speaking. The shouting had died down almost immediately, the reporters reluctant to drown him out and potentially miss an important detail. He scanned the crowd, the occasional shutter click of a camera breaking the silence. “My name is Detective Sin Minjun and with me today is my partner, Detective Yu Jihoon. On November 17th, we were assigned to the ongoing investigation into Lee Felix’s disappearance, which has now been determined to be a kidnapping.” 

As expected, all Hell broke loose.

In an instant, the journalists started hurling their questions at the detective, microphones and voice recorders thrusted into his general direction. They spoke a mile a minute, and Chan honestly wondered if they were shouting faster than Changbin could rap.

“How many assailants were involved? Do you know?”

“Was Felix harmed during the attack?”

“Could you clarify how Felix was kidnapped?”

“Have you made any ground on the investigation?”

“Has his family been notified? Could we possibly get a statement from them?”

Detective Minjun tried to regain control, but they ignored him in favor of talking over each other. The cameras had been flashing non-stop since the announcement of Felix’s kidnapping, and Chan was forced to look away to avoid being blinded. The shutter clicks almost drowned out the reporters, but it seemed like they took it as a challenge, fighting harder than ever to be heard over the chaos. Detective Minjun raised his own voice, but it was useless. Chan wouldn’t have even known he was speaking if he hadn’t been watching his lips move.

Suddenly, Chan felt the comforting presence of Mrs. Lee leave his side. He turned to see her stepping up beside the detective, gently pushing him away, and grabbing the mic on the podium. She brought it to her lips.

“Everyone, _calm down_ ,” she ordered. She spoke loud enough that her amplified voice rose above the shouting and clicking. The journalists quieted down immediately, some surprised by her commanding tone. She scanned the crowd with stern eyes before stepping down and motioning for Detective Minjun to continue. The reporters watched her return to Chan’s side where she took and squeezed his sweaty hand.

“Please, save your questions for the end. I will answer them to the best of my ability after we’ve shared all the facts with you. Now,” the detective cleared his throat. He shuffled his papers, seemingly collecting his thoughts. “Yes, Lee Felix was kidnapped. A nearby security camera captured what we believe to be three masked assailants surrounding and subduing Mr. Lee. After viewing the film, it is strongly suggested that he was drugged to avoid any resistance. A large black van, driven by a fourth assailant, was used to carry Felix out of the city. Unfortunately, the license plate was covered, and the traffic cameras lost sight of the vehicle a few kilometers outside of the city. At this time, there have not been any attempts at contact for a ransom request. The motive behind the attack is still unknown, as are the identities of those involved. The investigation is ongoing, as stated earlier, but we will not comment on its progression to avoid alerting any suspects. The leader of Stray Kids, Bang Chan, will now describe Felix’s last known appearance to assist those searching for him.”

The shutter clicks increased a small bit as Chan replaced the detective at the podium. He took a deep breath, letting it out slowly. Finally, he lifted his head and faced the crowd.

“Felix left the dorms around 9:45 pm on November 16th, and the last contact we had with him was 11:30 pm, when he texted that he was on his way back. He was wearing a jean jacket with a grey hood, a light red tee shirt, black Nike tapered joggers, and white Adidas sneakers.”

The silence was almost distracting as Chan tried to gather his thoughts. The journalists watched him intently, their cameras glued to their faces.

“Felix’s hair had been dyed blonde, and the only things he had on him at the time were his earbuds and his phone, which we found later that night.” Chan instinctively reached for his back pocket, where the cracked phone with a koala case was safely tucked inside. As soon as his fingers brushed the cool plastic, he froze.

He was speaking at a press conference, telling reporters what Felix had been wearing the night he had been _kidnapped_. The search parties needed the information so they could recognize him if they found him---or if they found his body.

Suddenly, it was hard to breathe.

Chan felt his throat close up as a wave of emotion overtook him. He clenched his jaw, willing the onoming tears away, but it was proving futile.

“Felix … he---uh, he fought back.” His voice was trembling almost as much as his hands when he faced the crowd again. “H-He fought back against his kidnappers so, uh, he might have defensive wounds.” The cameras were flashing relentlessly, and only after he reached up to shield his eyes from the lights did Chan realize there were tears streaming down his face. His vision was becoming blurrier by the second. Chan fidgeted as he struggled for words.

“He has freckles …”

A sweet memory of Felix letting Jeongin count the dots across his nose and cheeks sprang to mind, causing Chan to clench his jaw.

“… smiles with his eyes …”

Chan saw Felix beaming after their choreographer complimented his progress with the dance.

“… laughs loudly, without a care in the world …”

Felix, with his head thrown back, letting the giggles escape him until he couldn’t breathe.

The silence was deafening. Chan felt hundreds of eyes drilling holes into him from all angles, but he didn’t even acknowledge it. His gaze was focused on nothing while his mind drifted.

“ _Christopher?_ ”

The warm hand on his shoulder didn’t startle him, but it managed to pull him from his head.

“ _Christopher? Honey?_ ” Mrs. Lee was watching him, concern evident in her expression. Chan stared back blankly.

Mama Lee smiled softly and brought her other hand up to grip his arm, a silent question being asked. He nodded---no words spoken between the two yet he understood perfectly. He allowed himself to be gently guided back to his spot beside Seungmin, away from the podium and away from the cameras.

With every step he took, Chan found it easier and easier to breathe again. As soon as he was within reaching distance, Seungmin took his hand and squeezed it tightly. Mrs. Lee released her grip, and the younger member carefully pulled his leader over until they were both surrounded by the rest of the group. It was shocking to Chan just how quickly he recovered once he was in the presence of his brothers. They all had a hold of him somehow, whether it was a hand on his back or a pinch of his shirt between their fingers. With his members by his side, Chan was able to think clearly.

By the time he tuned back in to the press conference, JYP had almost finished his spiel. He looked to be at ease in front of the large crowd, something Chan found unsurprising. The company founder spoke confidently and kept his expression relaxed.

“Our top priorities at the moment are finding Felix and ensuring the safety of our remaining idols. We have designated a page of our website to forming search parties, all of which will be positioned where the traffic cameras last filmed the van Felix was being carried in. Anyone can join a search party as long as they are physically capable of trekking distances upwards of 20 kilometers a day. We are actively communicating with investigators and will update volunteer searchers with any valuable information as it is uncovered. The company has also decided to implement new regulations and curfews for all JYPE staff. Starting today, staff members can not leave the building or dorms alone. They will be required to travel with one other person to decrease the chances of this happening again. Our security equipment has been updated and more security guards have been hired. JYPE is taking this situation very seriously, and we are open to suggestions on how to better protect those under our supervision. Thank you.”

The reporters remained quiet with the exception of an occasional shutter click. It seemed JYP was very thorough with his explanation, leaving them with no questions.

The peace was temporary, however.

As soon as Mrs. Lee stepped forward to replace the company founder, the cameras exploded into action and all the reporters attempted to shove their way to the front, hoping for a statement from the woman they had identified as Felix’s mom.

Mama Lee ignored them all, opting to reposition the microphone down to her height as the chaos erupted around her. Once she was satisfied with the mic, she looked up at the crowd and began.

The reporters hushed themselves as Mrs. Lee spoke, “My name is Lee Dasom, and Lee Felix is my beautiful son.”

It was strange to see such a petite woman commanding the large crowd with just her tone of voice but incredible nonetheless. Mama Lee didn’t even have to tell them to shut up for them to go ahead and do it. She had the aura of a woman you didn’t want to mess with---someone you had no choice but to respect instantly. Chan understood why Felix had always spoken of his mother with awe in his eyes.

“The circumstances under which my family has been living have been unusual for a couple years now. My son lives across the ocean, on an entirely different continent. It was extremely difficult, but we made it work because it was his dream to become a musician here in South Korea. One of the hardest parts of having your child move out of the house is the knowledge that you are basically helpless and can not protect them like you used to. Imagine that paranoia and fear being tripled when your child moves so far away that you can only reach them by a several hour long airplane trip. That feeling is what I’ve been dealing with for years. Now, my worst fear has come true.”

His entire life, Chan had found it more difficult to witness someone he cared about experience pain than it would be to experience the pain himself. Watching Mrs. Lee---one of the strongest, most badass people he knew on this planet---come to the brink of tears as she speaks about having her son taken from her was absolutely heart wrenching. His chest physically hurt every time her voice wavered, and he squeezed his eyes shut so he wouldn’t have to see her fighting back sobs.

His members seemed to be struggling just as much as him. They shuffled closer together, clinging on to each other to feel some sort of comfort.

“My son was attacked, drugged, and thrown in the back of a van. These disgusting individuals ignored his pleas for help and stole him away from those who love him,” Mama Lee’s voice broke as her emotions swelled, and Chan sucked in a breath. Against his better judgement, the Aussie peeked over his shoulder and back at the JYP building. He peered right through the glass to see the rest of Felix’s family.

They were huddled together just like the members were, with Felix’s father wrapping a strong arm around both of his daughters. His head was bowed, but his face was filled with pain and grief. Felix’s older sister, Rachel, was stroking the hair of her sibling, tears running from her eyes down to her jaw. She seemed to be whispering something, but her lips trembled as they moved. Chan let his gaze drop to the youngest family member---Felix’s little sister, Olivia. She was tucked into Rachel’s arms, but her head was turned to face the crowd of reporters and her mother. Her entire body shook with the force of her sobs, and her expression was crumpled into one of anguish.

Feeling someone’s stare, she ripped her bloodshot eyes from her mom to meet Chan’s.

For a moment, they just watched each other grieve. Chan swallowed the lump in his throat, and Olivia’s sobs dwindled into soft hiccups. Chan took a deep, slow breath. Olivia blinked at him, no fresh tears falling.

Chan looked away.

“Please, I beg of you, bring my son back to me. I just want to hold him again. I want to hear his laugh and see his smile light up his face. I want him safe and sound with his family. Felix is an incredibly caring young man with a heart of gold. He doesn’t deserve this. Please … bring my baby back to me.”

As she finished speaking, Mama Lee wiped the tears from her cheeks and stepped away from the podium. The detectives took her place, and the reporters lunged at the chance to ask their questions. As the shouting and clicking of cameras grew louder, Mrs. Lee hurried towards Chan and the members, her eyes still rimmed with red. She spread her arms and quickly herded the boys towards the safety of the JYP building. Chan allowed the other members to pass him, opting to hang back. Mrs. Lee reached him, her expression a mix between worry and confusion. Chan said nothing, smiling softly as he gripped her hand and squeezed.

The grateful, watery grin he got in return was most definitely worth it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so was it bad?  
> i dont think its that bad writing-wise but it just frustrated me so much and i thought it was boring but who knows? maybe you guys liked it  
> Currently im uploading and posting chapters on my moms computer because mine is still connected to my school and they blocked ao3 on it because they classified it as a porn website (i may have read a few mature-rated fics in my school computer and they mightve been monitoring it so my school administrators prob think im super kinky lol) so i have to juggle my writing with my school computer, my phone, and my moms computer just to upload a chapter  
> the nest chapter prob wont be for a while and it will at least be more interesting than this one so i hope you guys dont mind the wait that much  
> as always, THANK YOU FOR READING <3<3


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> First round of tests for Felix.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HELLO.  
> I am so happy to finally be back you have no idea. I'm a dum-dum and I told you guys I was close to finishing the next chapter like a week or two ago but I procrastinated because I'm an idiot lol  
> SO this chapter is angsty (of course) Felix POV during which the tests are starting ...  
> Not bad tests, don't worry. Those come later ;)  
> I hope you enjoy! This chapter is a tad bit longer than the previous one, if that makes up for anything
> 
> Side Note: Please read the end chapter notes if you want to have a say in what goes into the next chapter! Also, I forgot to remove the indents before each paragraph so please ignore that. I usually get rid of them because it looks better but I'm too lazy rn

As soon as Yunkwan pushed Felix through the double doors at the end of the cell block, the young idol was on high alert. Of course, he was wary of where the doctor was taking him and wanted to sense any threats before it was too late, but his main priority at the moment was searching for some kind of escape route.

Some might think he was foolish to believe he could find a means of escape as soon as he was out of his cell when prisoners who have been locked in this facility had never succeeded in doing so, despite being there for several years. Felix didn’t care how illogical it was because it was the only thing he could do in his current situation. Plus, a fresh pair of eyes could prove useful in spotting possible escape routes in an environment veteran prisoners had, unfortunately, become too familiar with. So, Felix let his gaze scan the new area of the facility with one thing on his mind.

The hallway they had entered was fairly short. It reached all the way from the left to the right with three sets of double doors distributed along the wall behind him. In front of him, there was only one way to go: down a wide corridor with a large iron door at the end. Felix could see several points of entry along said corridor, but as Yunkwan forced him towards the nearest one, the Aussie native had a terrifying thought strike him.

Without warning, he stopped in his tracks and twisted away from Yunkwan, his arm easily slipping from the startled brute’s grasp. Yunkwan shouted, but Felix didn’t take the opportunity to run. He merely turned around to face the doors he had just stepped through. His head whipped to each side as he studied the other two sets of double doors. They were exactly like the one leading back to his cell—same size, same color, same material, same beeping door lock.

 _Those are cell blocks_ , his mind helpfully supplied. _There are two more hallways filled with prisoners._

Yunkwan finally reached him and gripped Felix’s arm so tight it would most likely bruise later, but Felix didn’t care.

“Are those cell blocks?” he asked, voice shaking. When he didn’t get an immediate response from the brute, he continued, his tone growing desperate. “Are there more prisoners behind those doors? How many innocent people has this lunatic kidnapped?!”

Unsurprisingly, he didn’t receive an answer.

Instead, he was forced to turn around and keep moving towards the entrance down the hall. He allowed Yunkwan to drag him along, but he kept peeking over his shoulder, trying to catch one last glimpse of the three sets of intimidating double doors.

Eventually though, Felix gave up, his sight being obstructed by the wall of the room he had just entered. And despite the many birthday wishes he made as a child, the young idol did not have x-ray vision.

Finally tearing his attention away from the cell block doors, the Aussie was greeted by a small room painted a soft pastel green. On the right side of the room sat a single exam table---almost identical to the ones commonly used in the average hospital. There were a few cupboards and countertops with cabinets covering the far left and back wall, but other than that, the room was bare. Yunkwan roughly pushed Felix towards the exam table, his grip still unnecessarily tight on his arm. The idol seated himself on the table without any resistance, and Yunkwan huffed, seemingly pleased. He crossed the room and leaned back onto the wall next to the cabinets. For a minute or two, there was an extremely awkward, tense silence. Yunkwan paid Felix no mind, and Felix let his eyes wander.

If he ignored the brute positioned across from him, the Aussie could’ve been convinced that he was at a doctor’s exam, waiting for his check up. Although, he was ripped out of that daydream when he noticed the lack of windows in the room, reminding him once again that he was in a mad scientist's secret lab as his unwilling subject of experimentation.

Almost as if he was summoned by Felix’s thoughts, the door burst open and Dr. Hess appeared. As always, Minhee was right on his heels. Dr. Hess didn’t even spare Felix a glance at first, too busy pulling supplies out of the cupboards and setting them on the countertop. Minhee freed a yellow file from her clipboard and handed it to her boss, the man finally slowing his movements as he took it from her.

“Felix,” he started, scanning the papers within the folder quickly. His eyes lifted to study the idol. “Today is your first day of testing!”

The cheery tone the doctor used did nothing to lift Felix’s spirits. In fact, his anxiety only increased as his vivid imagination ran wild with what “testing” could possibly mean.

“Don’t worry, dear boy. The first tests are always easy and painless---just some vitals and body condition scoring. Basically, we’re going to record how your body has changed since you joined us here at the lab.” As he spoke, the doctor gave the file back to his assistant and picked up a familiar piece of equipment. It was the black cuff that doctors often used to measure blood pressure. He stepped closer to Felix and motioned for him to hold an arm out.

Felix’s nerves had settled a slight bit when he saw something familiar---something he knew wasn’t dangerous---but he wasn’t so sure that he trusted the man before him not to whip a blade out and hack his arm off if he let his guard down. The sandy haired man was unpredictable and obviously out of his mind. Felix wanted nothing more than to return to the safety of his cell and never leave it. Every minute spent in Dr. Hess’s company was making his anxiety skyrocket.

“I’m not going to bite, Felix. I just need to measure your blood pressure. Surely you’ve done this before at your annual check-ups? This time is no different,” the man said, trying for a gentle, soothing tone. Of course, it did absolute shit at comforting the young idol.

“This time is no different?” Felix asked. He didn’t bother hiding his utter disbelief at the doctor’s choice of words. His face had twisted into an incredulous expression, and he pulled away from the man in front of him. “This time is no _different_?!”

“Felix.” Dr. Hess sighed, the warning clear in his voice. “Just let me take your vitals. The faster we get this done, the faster you can return to your cell to see Rose and Kyuho. Okay?”

Felix hated that the doctor was already using Rose and Kyuho against him to get him to cooperate. He hated it even more because it was working.

“Fine.” The Aussie boy conceded after a moment of tense silence, holding his right arm out straight. The doctor smiled, grateful, but Felix knew he was secretly smug and had to use all of his willpower to stop himself from delivering a swift backhand to the man in front of him.

Dr. Hess secured the cuff around his upper arm and picked up the attached scale. He used his free hand to unwind the stethoscope that Felix hadn’t noticed until that moment from his neck, placing the buds in his ears and holding the end of it up against the idol’s skin. He inflated the cuff a few times, his eyes focused on the measurement scale in his hands. After only a few minutes, he removed the cuff and pulled the stethoscope out of his ears.

“Your blood pressure is 110 over 70, which is perfectly healthy for a man of your age. Minhee, be sure to record that in his chart.”

The doctor’s assistant didn’t say anything, but she opened the yellow file and scribbled on one of the pages inside it. Dr. Hess turned around, placing the cuff back in one of the cabinets.

The “exam” continued just like that. The mad scientist would take Felix’s vitals and repeat them out loud for Minhee to write down. Felix’s anxiety lessened slowly because the situation reminded him of his regular doctor exams both before and after becoming an idol. It was all familiar: the uncomfortable feeling of having a thermometer under his tongue, the cold touch of the stethoscope on his chest, and the smell of antiseptic emanating throughout the room. He even started to relax a little.

Unfortunately, Felix never had complete peace in this Hell hole.

After taking and recording all the necessary vitals, the man replaced his equipment and adjusted his lab coat.

“Okay!” he chirped, his laugh lines deepening with his smile. “Now that that’s out of the way, we can move on to the exciting stuff.”

Immediately, the idol felt the overwhelming anxiety return. His heart started pounding, and his entire body tensed.

The doctor seemed to notice the change in Felix because he held his hands out in a placating gesture. “Nothing bad, I assure you! The worst we’re going to do today is a little blood sample. I don’t know how you feel about needles, but it won’t take long. I promise.”

Of course, the man’s attempt at soothing the idol was fruitless---Felix’s mind was too caught up in his choice of words to really process what he had said.

 _What did he mean by_ today _?_ His brain panicked. _Did he imply that there will be worse tests in the future?_

Fortunately, Felix was ripped from his wild thoughts by the doctor himself.

“The first thing we wanted to do was take a full body radiograph, or ‘x-ray’, if you will. It won’t take long, and I’m sure you already know that radiographs are completely painless.”

As he spoke, Dr. Hess motioned for Minhee to exit the room. She left quickly, and the doctor stepped aside for Yunkwan to reach Felix. Apparently, they were moving rooms yet again because the brute forced Felix to follow Dr. Hess as he made his way towards the door.

The idol was pushed across the wide hallway into a room diagonal from the one he had just been in. It was much larger, and the walls were painted a dark blue color. Again, there were no windows, but there was a coat rack of sorts with several thick grey aprons hanging from it. At the very back of the room stood another exam table, but this one had a large mechanical arm reaching up and over it. Attached to the arm was a little box that looked as if it could rotate and move along the mechanical arm. Minhee was stationed in front of the equipment, and she appeared to be busy typing on a computer.

As soon as everyone was in the room, Yunkwan shut the door behind them, grunting as he did so. It left Felix wondering just how heavy the wood could be. Then, Yunkwan turned to face the idol and motioned towards the metal collar around his neck. Felix tilted his head, confused, but the brute ignored him. He reached up, unclasping the device, and backed himself into the nearest corner with it in his hands.

Now Felix was extremely confused.

“That device might interfere with our equipment, so we have to remove it in order to get clear radiographs,” the doctor so kindly explained, obviously picking up on the idol’s confusion. When Felix turned to face him, he hadn’t expected to see the man draped with one of the thick grey aprons, what looked like a neck brace, and a large pair of gloves. He looked slightly ridiculous. “Minhee here has already prepared the machine, so we just have to wait for her to gear up. Go ahead and lay down on that table there---on your stomach please.”

Felix hesitated for a moment, hardly willing to listen to the doctor’s orders. Every instinct of his was screaming at him to pull open the heavy door and make a mad dash down the hallway. However, he still had no idea how to actually escape the facility, and he couldn’t leave Rose and Kyuho behind. Eventually, his mind squashed his hope at a speedy escape, forcing his body forward and onto the exam table. As he sat down, he took a deep breath and stretched his wings outward.

He hadn’t moved them much since his morning exercises, and they were starting to feel a bit cramped. It was getting to a point that Felix would forget they were even there; they had become so familiar. In the short amount of time between the procedure and now, almost all of his feather shafts had finished sprouting. There were still a few spots of pink skin visible, but the wings were developing quickly, resembling a porcupine with its quills more than anything else.

“Alright Felix,” Dr. Hess began. He was standing beside Minhee at the computer, his eyes focused on the screen. He turned to the Aussie with a smile. “We’re going to take a dorsal-ventral radiograph first. All that means is that you need to lay on your stomach. This radiograph will help us ensure that your wings are growing in a way that is structurally sound. Okay?”

Felix nodded but said nothing. He was grateful that he didn’t have to undress or anything. He was already extremely uncomfortable with three pairs of eyes watching his every move.

Once he was situated on his stomach, arms resting at his sides and head turned to face the computer, Dr. Hess cleared his throat.

“Go ahead, Minhee.”

Suddenly, the large machine above him came to life, making Felix jump slightly. He quickly composed himself, trying his best to keep still. The young man knew what an x-ray was---he knew they were completely painless. So, as the machine slowly roamed the length of his body, he was able to force his muscles to relax.

The machine whirred and hovered above him for several seconds. Once it reached his torso, he heard the doctor speak over the machine’s constant humming. “We’ve progressed as far as your waist, so we’ll need you to keep your wings within the frame of the table. That way, they’ll fit in the picture. Also, keep them very still.”

Felix complied with the instructions, finding it relatively easy to hold his wings in the required position. In a matter of moments, the machine returned to its original position and quieted down.

“Good!” The doctor shot the idol a thumb’s up. Felix took that as his cue to sit up. “You did great. We need you to do the same thing one more time but on your back.”

Felix sighed discreetly, but adjusted himself to lay down. Although, as soon as he lowered his upper back to the table, he felt a twinge of pain. His wings were blocking his spine from touching the cold metal, and, since the skin under the feather shafts was still sensitive, it was slightly sore.

The doctor, noticing Felix’s predicament, said, “Unfortunately, you’re going to have to try and ignore your wings. I know it’s very uncomfortable, but it will only last a minute or two.”

Felix couldn’t help the way his eyes rolled. He scoffed, but it shifted into a grimace as he tried to lay down again. This time, he gritted his teeth and rested his weight on his new appendages.

The machine started up once he was settled, and Felix closed his eyes, trying to think of anything else but the stinging pain radiating across his wings. It was strange, feeling any kind of sensation in an area that used to be nothing more than dead air, but Felix was slowly becoming accustomed to it.

This time around, the young man felt as if the machine took twice as long to reach his torso. Maybe it was because his position was extremely uncomfortable, but it didn’t matter. All he knew was that he wanted the machine to hurry the fuck up.

“Felix, could you hold your breath, please? It will result in a clearer radiograph.”

The idol pressed his lips in a firm line. He took a shallow breath and held it, forcing his mind to focus on literally anything except the biting pain that was steadily getting worse. Obviously, his wings were struggling to support his full weight.

Finally, the machine’s humming ceased. Felix sat up immediately, the sudden movement causing him to feel a bit lightheaded. He ignored it, dangling his legs over the side of the table as he turned to face the doctor and his assistant. The skin on his wings still burned slightly, but with the pressure that had been stretching it gone, it felt a lot better.

Dr. Hess was smiling brightly as he watched the computer screen. Minhee was expressionless as always. The doctor ripped his attention from the device long enough to point his smile at Felix.

“You did great! The radiographs are loading now, so we can go ahead and move on to the next test.”

Felix saw Yunkwan stride towards him, almost forgetting that the brute had been in the room the entire time. He didn’t resist as the man clasped the metal collar back around his throat.

By that time, the doctor and his assistant had removed their thick aprons, gloves, and neck brace things. Minhee collected her clipboard and the file, scribbling something down within it. Dr. Hess waited until she was done then led the way out of the room and down the hallway. Minhee was right on his heels with Yunkwan and Felix behind them. They didn’t have to walk far, only moving one door down.

Felix stepped in the new room to see a large table positioned inside an even bigger tunnel of sorts. It looked familiar, and the young man realized he had watched multiple movies with this particular piece of equipment. It was an MRI Scanner. He didn’t know what MRI stood for, but he knew it was similar to an x-ray machine in that it wasn’t painful.

The process for the MRI was almost the exact same as the x-ray. Yunkwan removed Felix’s collar and stepped to the side, separating himself from the others by hiding in a little room in the corner. Inside were a few tables, all holding at least one computer. There were large glass windows allowing those inside the room to see the MRI scanner without being exposed to the strong magnetic pull of it.

Dr. Hess and Minhee didn’t get dressed in thick protective gear this time, opting to stay in their pristine white lab coats. Minhee joined Yunkwan in the smaller room in order to begin firing up the machine and the computers monitoring it. Dr. Hess stayed with Felix.

“With the MRI scan, you will have to lay on your back again. We will try to make it as comfortable as possible with pillows and cushions, but your wings may make the process a tad bit uncomfortable again. You also have the option of wearing noise canceling headphones to drown out the sounds of the equipment because this machine in particular is very loud.” The doctor was busy fluffing the pillows on the table, trying to position them to support Felix’s uncommon appendages. “You will also have to stay as still as possible to ensure we get a clear image. The scan will last around 45 minutes, and if you end up falling asleep, that’s fine. Understand?”

Felix nodded once. He watched the doctor arrange the cushions before his attention was stolen by a pair of wireless headphones sitting on the edge of the table. He crossed the room, grabbed them, and placed them over his ears. Since his ears lacked any jewelry---due to the doctor’s gang of thugs removing anything of value from his person before they brought him into the facility---they fit nicely. He heard some muffled noise from beside him and pulled one of his ears free.

“I think we’re almost ready. You can go ahead and lay down so I can adjust the pillows for you,” Dr. Hess spoke, motioning with a hand towards the table. Felix took a breath and did as he was told. The cushions were very soft and kept his wings from being crushed by his weight. They supported his head and neck too. However, Felix couldn’t get super comfortable because the doc was creepily staring down at him with a grin. “Everything’s good? Do I need to move anything around?”

Felix spoke for the first time in what felt like hours, “No. I’m fine.”

His voice was a little rough and deeper than normal, but he didn’t care. If Dr. Hess was surprised, he didn’t show it. Instead, he nodded and left the table’s side, making his way towards the door to the smaller room. Just before he joined his assistant and Yunkwan, he shot a contemplating look over his shoulder at Felix.

“What music do you want to listen to?”

Felix stared at him for a solid moment, totally befuddled, before he remembered the pair of headphones covering one of his ears. He thought about it for a moment. This would be the first time he would listen to music since his abduction. Admittedly, the facility played soft classical music over the cell block speakers in between meals every day, but that didn’t count. This would be the first time he listened to guitars and drums instead of violins and cellos since he arrived. But, as he let his brain wander, trying to choose one song or artist over all the others, he realized he didn’t really care. He shouldn’t be treating this as the last time he would ever hear music again because in a matter of weeks, he would escape this hell hole and would have the option to listen to whatever the fuck he wanted to.

So, when he turned his attention back to the sandy-haired doctor, his eyes were stormy. He shook his head slowly.

“I don’t care.”

Dr. Hess watched him for a second or two, his blank expression betraying nothing. Finally, he shrugged.

“Okay. Suit yourself,” he said, stepping into the smaller room and shutting the door behind him.

Felix studied the three people through the glass window separating them. His face remained neutral, but his heart pounded and the anger climbed up his throat. He wanted to scream, to throw the headphones at the glass despite knowing that it wouldn’t even crack. He wanted to do _something_ other than roll over onto his back and submit to the maniac in the white lab coat.

But he needed to be smart. He had to hold his tongue and comply with the doctor’s orders until he found a guaranteed means of escape for him and his two new friends. It could take days, weeks, months, or even years, but he would do it. He _had_ to do it.

He would make it back to his family---the one related to him by blood and the one he had found in Korea---but, for now, he would bide his time and stay safe.

Felix reached a hand up to pull the headphones over both ears and settled into the pillows. Even though the music hadn’t started playing yet, the headphones successfully blocked most of the noise that filled the room as the MRI started up. It took a minute, but eventually, the table underneath his body began moving, carrying him along with it.

Just as Felix’s head entered the tunnel of the MRI scanner, he heard an eerily familiar whining sound from the headphones. His body froze and his brain fought to process the slowly building melody that followed. By the time Chan’s soft voice filled his ears, Felix’s eyes had slid shut and a single tear had found its way down his cheek, gravity pulling it down towards the headphones.

That bastard of a doctor knew what he was doing. He was _trying_ to hurt Felix by playing the last title track the members had all worked on together as a group. He knew that “I am You” was a song about that special person staying beside you no matter what. He was well aware that, because he had stepped in and snatched the idol from that sidewalk, Felix couldn’t stay beside his members. He couldn’t be with them because he was trapped in this damned facility. They had absolutely no clue where he was, and they were most likely hurting because of it.

Felix could feel the red hot rage building deep in his chest. He clenched his teeth and curled his hands into fists. The deep breaths he forced through his nose did nothing to stop his body from trembling. He was contemplating how hard it would be to pull himself from the machine, march up into that little room, and force that evil man’s head through one of those computer screens.

Just as the anger reached its boiling point and Felix moved his arms towards the sides of the tunnel, ready to put his plan into action, one of the voices filtering through his ears stopped him completely.

Changbin.

His words washed over Felix, immediately soothing him. His line wasn’t long, so his rap ended quickly, but Felix didn’t mind. The effect that the rapper’s raspy tone had on him was instantaneous and powerful. He didn’t need Changbin constantly whispering reassurances into his ear. Just a few words was enough to help him relax back into the cushions.

He knew what the doctor was trying to do, but it wouldn’t work. In fact, instead of breaking Felix down, piece by piece, his group’s music built him back up and made him feel stronger, more capable. The voices of his family filled his head as one song bled into the next. For the first time that day, Felix caught himself smiling. He enjoyed hearing the steady voices of the Stray Kids vocal line. Their impressive high notes and ethereal melodies made his skin tingle and heart melt. The rest of the members would come in with fluctuating tones, spitting one word after another in quick succession. They played off of each other’s energy throughout every song, despite the fact that, in reality, many of the lines were recorded alone, with none of the other members present.

Occasionally, Felix would pick up on his own voice, surprising himself with how well he sounded. Oftentimes, the young man was too blinded by his self-doubt to listen to his lines or watch his dances with a neutral point of view. He picked his own performances apart in an unhealthy way. He never gave himself a proper break, wanting nothing more than to improve with everything he did.

What he didn’t realize until that moment was that he _had_ improved, immensely. His voice didn’t waver or crack when he rapped. His pronunciation was indistinguishable to that of a native speaker. His energy and tone oozed confidence even though he was always finding something to criticize. It was weird, finally being able to see the improvement that everyone around him had pointed out for years. It was weird, but it was also incredibly rewarding.

Felix loved listening to his group’s music because he could hear all of his members. He could feel their energy and love directed towards their Stay through their songs. As each of his members delivered their lines, memories of them filled his head. He loved each of them equally, as family.

But something in Felix reacted differently whenever Changbin’s husky voice filled his headphones: his heart beat faster, his cheeks burned red, an involuntary smile would take over his face. He knew what it meant. He had known for a few months now, and while Felix himself had accepted and embraced his feelings for his hyung, the world around him was still lagging behind. However, the Aussie native wasn’t nearly as concerned with society’s prejudice against people like him as he was with Changbin’s thoughts on the matter.

A few months into their training together, Chan had gathered the entire group together and brought up the issue of LGBTQ+ to create a discussion among his members. After only a couple minutes of debating, it became quite clear that none of the boys had anything bad to say. In fact, they were completely supportive and entirely open-minded. So much so, that Jisung and Minho had felt comfortable enough to tell their members that they had started dating. Celebratory ice cream and a Marvel movie marathon filled the rest of the evening, and Felix fell asleep that night with his cheeks sore from smiling and a heavy weight lifted from his shoulders. He now knew that his family would stay by his side, no matter who he ended up loving.

He definitely didn’t expect to catch feelings for Changbin only a few weeks later. Anytime the older rapper was mentioned, Felix felt the corners of his mouth stretch into a grin. When they were in the same room, the freckled boy couldn’t keep his eyes off his hyung. The first time he felt Changbin wrap his arms around him in a hug, the poor boy nearly combusted. It was glaringly obvious that something was brewing between the two of them, and all of the other members had caught on. Their teasing jabs and not at all subtle glances sent Felix’s anxiety through the roof. He knew Changbin was accepting of LGBTQ+ relationships, and he was just as much of a Minsung shipper as any of the boys, but Felix had no idea how the rapper would react if he learned the younger Aussie native was in love with him. The little voice in his ear would constantly remind him that, by confessing, he could potentially ruin their friendship. The fear that stemmed from that realization always stopped his heart and sent an unpleasant shiver down his spine.

No matter how amazing the thought of dating Changbin was, Felix couldn’t bring himself to risk losing his hyung for something that wasn’t guaranteed. Changbin was a calming, steadfast presence in his life, and he couldn’t possibly live without him. He had already decided early on that he would much rather silently suffer with his unrequited feelings than ruin the unique bond they shared. And, try as they might, the other members couldn’t convince him of anything else.

His mind occupied with memories and Stray Kids songs, Felix was so distracted that he didn’t notice the bed underneath him slowly sliding out of the MRI’s tunnel. His eyes were closed and his body was completely relaxed as he let the music wash over him. At that point, the bed had stopped moving and the machine had powered down, but Felix still didn’t realize. He was only ripped from his peaceful trance when the soothing chords of “Grow Up” were suddenly replaced by silence.

Immediately, Felix opened his eyes to find that he was no longer in the MRI. He sat up, hesitantly sliding the headphones from his ears to hang around his neck. A quick scan of the room told him that Minhee and Yunkwan were still in the separate room, but the doctor had left them in favor of greeting Felix.

“Hello, Felix.” He smiled, his eyes crinkling at the corners in a way that would be cute if it were literally anyone else. He seemed unusually pleased after such a normal procedure, instantly causing red flags to pop up all over in Felix’s mind. “You seemed very comfortable in there. I assume everything went well?”

The Aussie blinked, his brain dissecting the doctor’s words in an attempt to find some sort of trap. The sandy-haired man’s disposition was freaking Felix out. He was being too considerate, too polite.

“Yes,” he forced himself to say. “It did.”

Dr. Hess’s grin seemed to grow, if that was even possible. “Great! I’m glad it wasn’t too terrible of an experience for you. I wouldn’t want you to be distressed in any way.”

Felix had to guess that the man’s strange behavior was a result of his choice in music. Maybe he was trying to get a reaction out of the idol? Maybe the music was a test to see if Felix was emotionally unstable or something similar? The Aussie had absolutely no clue, and it was sending his heart into overdrive.

“This MRI was incredibly productive for me as well! While you were being scanned, I had an excellent idea come to me! I managed to mold it into a logical theory that I want to test out.”

If his heart had been in overdrive before, the doctor’s words sent it into fucking light speed.

“W-What do you mean?” He asked. His brain screamed at him that the doctor was insane and wanted to dissect him like a frog in biology class or something equally terrifying. He barely breathed, but his heart was close to bursting out of his rib cage.

“I’m glad you asked.” The doctor chuckled lightly, which only served to push Felix one step closer to a full-on panic attack. The man pulled his hands out of his lab coat pockets so he could gesture as he spoke. “Obviously, we’ve been conducting procedures and tests for a while before you came to the facility. However, you were the first one that took to the serum without any difficulty. You’re developing perfectly and in half the time it took Kyuho. You are also the first idol that we’ve worked with. In the beginning, I believed it was just a coincidence, but now, I think your development and your career as an idol are connected.”

Felix swallowed, his tongue feeling like a cinder block in his mouth. His mind was starting to connect the dots, and the weight of the situation slowly settled onto his shoulders. His heart was still pounding in his chest.

“Think about it! As an idol, you are expected to keep yourself in optimal physical shape. You have to be fit and healthy. But, the stress of living in the spotlight is wearing you down. Your body is strong enough to support the serum and any new animal traits you may gain. At the same time, you are overwhelmed with stress and anxiety, which makes your cells weaker and more susceptible to my serum.”

Obviously, the doctor was speaking in terms that the average person could understand, but Felix’s mind was too busy racing with fear and nerves to properly process his words. He was trying to explain his reasoning, yet Felix heard nothing but his own internal panic.

“What I’m trying to say is idols could be the key to a major breakthrough in my research! I’ve been avoiding using people with family or friends because I didn’t want to start a frenzy, but I’ve been doing it wrong this entire time! I need _idols_ , not regular people off the street! I know it may sound a little strange, but the only way to prove I’m right is to conduct more research.”

Felix swore that his heart stopped dead at that moment.

“More research?” he wondered aloud, his mouth slamming shut as soon as the words were out. The blonde doctor had been ranting with a huge grin, his hands gesturing wildly and his eyes bright in uncontained glee. Felix’s voice seemed to break Dr. Hess of his trance, and he glanced back down at the boy, blinking slowly.

“Well, yes, of course.” He responded, the grin easing up in intensity. His hands found their way back to his pockets. “To prove a theory, one must experiment. In order to find out if idols truly are the key to a successful animal-human hybrid, I need to test it. You can’t conduct one experiment and declare your findings as law. You must experiment multiple times while taking several different variables into consideration. Maybe it does have to do with his career as an idol? Maybe it’s entirely hereditary? I won’t know until I test it. I’ll have to inform Yehun so he can start bringing me more idols.”

As he spoke, Dr. Hess seemed to be paying less attention to Felix. He looked as if he was beginning to talk to himself rather than the freckled boy. The last thing he said was more of a mental note for later than anything else, but it made Felix’s blood run cold. More idols? Did that mean they were going to kidnap more artists? What about the bodyguards and managers constantly keeping an eye on their groups? What about the concerned fans and family members? Did they even care about all of the people they would be hurting by doing this? Felix didn’t think so. He knew it was selfish, but his mind drifted to his own members. Would they target JYP artists? Would they come after the remaining Stray Kids? He had no idea, and even if he did, he was helplessly trapped in this godforsaken facility.

His brain seemed to fixate on that thought in particular. Internally, the Aussie was screaming and begging, desperate to be released so he could protect the only people he truly cared about. His mind was running rampant with worst-case scenarios and continuously reminded him that he was useless here. He was completely at the mercy of the insane doctor who was indifferent to the boy’s struggle, and, by extension, so was his family.

Felix’s thoughts drifted into dangerous territory, and he knew it was risky, but he couldn’t bring himself to care. His imagination supplied pictures of his members being torn from their brothers and roughly shoved in the back of a van despite their pleading cries, his two sisters strapped to cold metal tables as they screamed for help, the purple liquid slowly traveling through the IV, and his mom and dad hugging each other desperately as they learn that their children had been ripped from their grasp.

And it was all his fault.

He should’ve been there to protect them. He should’ve escaped the mad doctor and had him arrested to prevent him from ruining anymore lives. He should’ve done _something_ other than sitting in his cell for weeks on end, dancing to silence.

That evening, after having a blood sample taken and letting Dr. Hess manhandle his little wings, Felix was carted back to his “room.” Rose and Kyuho called out to him, excited to see their new friend after being separated the entire day, but he barely heard it. The buzzing in his ears was too loud. Their greetings soon shifted into concerned questions, but he made no move to acknowledge them. His own voice sneered in his ear, telling him how he was useless and pathetic---how his loved ones were better off without him. At that point, he wasn’t sure if he was even listening to his own self-destructive thoughts. His mind was blank except for one thing.

Felix laid down on his bed, fixated solely on the stomach-churning knowledge that he was the only person who knew that the doctor was going to strike again, yet he was utterly powerless to stop him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So ... interesting ending, dont ya think?  
> Yes, Dr. Hess is looking in to kidnapping some more idols. WHo he's interested in is a secret ;)  
> BUT, what I wanted to mention in these end notes is my little apology for updating so slow lol  
> The next chapter is centered around Changbin's POV for the first time, and I wanted to include some rare fluff for you guys. HOWEVER, you have two options (because I can't choose and I want your opinions)  
> You can either have:  
> A) Pure Fluff  
> or...  
> B) Mostly Fluff with a tad bit of Angst
> 
> It's truly up to you guys because I'm happy writing either one. Lemme know what you want :)  
> As always, thanks for reading!!! <3


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The members try to enjoy a day off, but the media has other plans.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'M NOT DEAD!!!  
> For some, that will be exciting news! For others ... maybe not! Whatever the case, I'm sorry I was on such a long hiatus! I really didn't mean to be gone for several months but its been a busy several months so this fic was placed on the back burner  
> Regardless, I'm BACK with a MONSTER of an update (seriously it was like 28 pages long in google docs) to make up for it. Apparently I'm right on time too (with SKZ deciding to have a comeback around the same time?!?!)  
> Side Note: I discovered that I absolutely suck at writing fluff and if its cringey or difficult to read I'm SORRY i really tried lol  
> I hope you enjoy!!!

The longer Changbin scrolled through twitter, the more his eyes stung with unshed tears. His entire feed was filled with post after post from news outlets and fans. It seemed as if all they could talk about was the mess of a press conference that had taken place the previous day. It made sense, of course. It was just confirmed that a member from one of the largest korean boy bands had been kidnapped. That kind of news didn’t just fade away due to lack of public interest. Still, it was hard for Changbin to be constantly reminded of his failure as a friend and hyung.

Felix was his dongsaeng. He had joined JYP after Changbin had already been training for a couple years. Despite the difference in age and experience as an idol, the two quickly grew close. When either of them were facing challenges or struggled with issues such as homesickness, they sought out each other. Changbin had lost count of how many times he held a sniffling Felix in his arms late at night after a particularly taxing training day. Once the survival show began, they slipped into the routine of cuddling every night until they fell asleep. It was the only thing that kept them from losing their minds as the stress and expectations piled up.

Changbin had been unable to protect Felix from being eliminated. He believed he had been given a second chance when JYP had allowed Felix and Minho to rejoin the group. The rapper had promised himself that he would do everything in his power to make sure that the boy who radiated sunshine and joy would never experience that kind of pain or hopelessness ever again.

Now, he had absolutely no idea what Felix was feeling. He didn’t know where he was, who he was with, or why he had been taken from them. He hadn’t been there when Felix decided to visit the studio to get more practice in, so he couldn’t have possibly stopped him from going or offered to join. His mind tried to persuade him that it was illogical to feel guilty for what happened, but his heart told him otherwise.

As a hyung, Changbin was tasked with protecting his dongsaengs. He should be there for them, no matter what they’re facing or where they are. He tried his hardest to support every one of his members, but Felix always had him wrapped around his little finger. He was so in tune with the younger Aussie that he could sense something was wrong the moment he spoke. His voice was one of his biggest tells because it shook in a nearly indiscernible way that only Changbin could pick up on. He had the ability to read Felix like a book---his eyes were always so expressive to those who knew how to decipher them. Felix was his guiding light when the surrounding world seemed to fade into the darkness ever present in his mind.

And now that light was flickering, just out of Changbin’s reach.

“Binnie? You in there?”

The soft voice was accompanied by a gentle knock. Changbin had shut himself inside his room the moment he had finished his breakfast, wanting to be alone with his self-deprecating thoughts. He had found it strange that someone hadn’t already come barging in, but his luck had apparently run out. 

“Yeah. I’m here,” he replied, shutting his phone off and rubbing at his eyes. He hadn’t been sleeping very well since … that night. He knew he probably looked awful.

The doorknob twisted as the visitor let himself in. The day after all the members moved into their shared dorms, Chan had laid down some ground rules that they all had to follow. One of them prohibited the use of a lock on any door aside from the front entrance. It promoted trust among the members, and Changbin’s only issue with it was the fact that he couldn’t brood in peace without the constant threat of another member interrupting him---like right now.

Minho poked his head into the room, scanning the area before finally spotting Changbin splayed across his bed. If the rapper’s disheveled, stressed appearance was concerning in any way, Minho didn’t show it. Instead, a kind smile formed on his face.

“Hey, Bin. The rest of us were about to start a game of Mafia. Wanna join?”

Changbin pursed his lips in thought. He knew the other members were worried about him. They weren’t very subtle about it. Recently, they had been taking turns dragging the rapper out of his studio where he holed up. They would force him to visit the building’s food court at least three times a day. They seemed to have a weird sixth sense that alerted them when he skipped meals. He would never admit it, but without the other members constantly checking up on him and interrupting his work, he wasn’t sure if he would still be breathing. Maybe if he joined them, he could set their worried minds at ease a little.

“Sure. I’ll be right there.”

Changbin had nothing better to do, and playing a quick game with his members could possibly take his attention off of their current situation. He had been reminded over and over that he couldn’t physically help in speeding up the process of finding Felix. They had already scheduled their first search party so all they could do was sit back and trust the detectives to do their job. It was excruciating, waiting around their dorm for something to happen. They were hardly clued in to how the investigation was progressing, so they had little to no knowledge on what headway the detectives were making.

In order to distract the members, Chan had suggested playing games. The rest of the boys loved the idea, gathering supplies and household items they could use to recreate their favorite games. Changbin had retired to his room to work on some lyrics, but it seemed the rest of the members had noticed his absence. 

Minho’s smile grew, and he threw out a two finger salute before stepping out of the room and shutting the door softly. Changbin grabbed his phone and put it on silent. He plugged it in next to his bed. He didn’t want to have it on him, knowing that the device would only distract him from spending quality time with the other boys.

The rapper made his way out of his room, checking the hallways for any members. He wanted to clean himself up before joining them. If they saw him in his current state, they would definitely know that he hadn’t gotten a full eight hours of sleep. Minho was just too nice to point it out.

After a quick trip to the bathroom to brush his teeth, tame his hair, and bathe in deodorant, Changbin felt decent enough to be seen by other humans. He headed towards the living room area, knowing that the members would most likely congregate there. He was right, walking in on a slightly menacing circle of adult men sitting cross-legged on the floor. From an outsider’s view, they looked as if they were summoning a demon. From Bin’s perspective, it was just another day in the life of Stray Kids.

Most of the boys were too preoccupied to notice Changbin’s entrance. They were pointing fingers and shouting at each other, arms flying up in every direction as they dramatically tried to get their message across. Either they had already started the game, or they were trying to pick the moderator.

Seungmin was the only one who wasn’t actively arguing with the rest of the members, so he was the first to spot Changbin slowly inching away from the scene he had walked in on. The boy immediately sensed the rapper’s intentions to escape.

“Binnie hyung is here, guys!” He yelled over the other voices, sealing poor Changbin’s fate. The other members abandoned their shouting match in favor of jumping to their feet and surrounding him.

“Hyung! You came!”

“Bin, come sit down!”

“Jeez, it took you long enough.”

“Sit next to me, Hyung!”

Changbin was guided towards the middle of the room and forced onto his ass in between Hyunjin and Jeongin. He didn’t get the chance to speak as the rest of the boys returned to their respective spots, all talking over each other.

“We couldn’t figure out who should be the moderator.”

“It should be the oldest!”

“I think it should be the youngest.”

“Can we pull straws?”

“Sure. As long as they’re metal straws. Save the turtles and shit.”

“I can be the moderator,” Changbin butted in. A throbbing headache was quickly forming as a result of the constant arguing. The rapper would do just about anything to bring peace to the dorm living room turned warzone.

A thoughtful silence filled the air as the members contemplated the offer. They seemed to accept it, all of them nodding along and shrugging as if they didn’t have a better idea.

Chan turned to Changbin, eyes wide and questioning. “Are you sure, Bin? If you want to play, we can force Jisung to be the moderator. He sucks at the game anyway.”

Ignoring the loud cry of protest from the aforementioned squirrel boy, Changbin snorted. He let a genuine, albeit small, smile spread across his face. “I’m sure.”

“We always make one of the losers take over as moderator for the next round, so Binnie won’t have to sit out the entire time,” Seungmin piped in from his spot on the other side of the circle. “Everyone will get to play.”

Jeongin shot a pointed look at Chan, who finally seemed appeased, before turning his attention on Changbin. He bounced up and down on his butt, an eager grin fixed in place. “Start the game, Hyung!”

Changbin chuckled lightly and forced himself to his feet. He gestured for the other members to lower their heads and pat the floor with open hands, disguising his choices and any other noise. First, he picked the detective by tapping Hyunjin on the shoulder. Then, he poked Minho, giving him the doctor role. Next, he decided to assign the mafia. Chan, Seungmin, Jisung, and Jeongin were left. The youngest member was practically vibrating with excitement. He loved this game more than most, probably because he was skilled in tricking his hyungs. So, wanting to start off with an interesting round, Changbin tapped Jeongin’s head. He could see the large grin overtaking the maknae’s face as he continued circling. Since there were only six players in the game, it would be unfair to have two mafias. In other words, Jeongin would be on his own. However, the maknae was notorious for manipulating the other members into believing his lies, and Changbin would bet his entire life’s savings that he would easily win this round.

With that, the roles were all assigned and Changbin told his members to lift their heads. The first “day” of the game was quick and uneventful. The boys spent the entire time accusing each other with no real evidence. They all claimed to be innocent civilians causing Bin to roll his eyes. He could already tell that this round would go to the singular mafia who was incredibly talented at keeping up his innocent facade.

Finally, “nighttime” came, and the boys lowered their heads. Changbin had Hyunjin choose who he wanted to investigate. The tall dancer seemed to be torn between Minho and Jisung, but eventually settled on investigating the younger boy. When Changbin gave him a thumb’s down, he pouted and dropped his head to the floor. Next, Minho chose to protect Seungmin, already certain that the vocalist was not a mafia. Changbin nodded and moved on, allowing Jeongin to finally choose his target.

When Jeongin lifted his head and scanned the circle of oblivious hyungs, a sinister smile formed on his face. He seemed downright giddy with the prospect of “killing” one of his fellow members. Changbin felt a nervous shudder go down his spine before realizing that he wasn’t one of the kid’s targets. Besides, he was the idiot that put the maknae in his current position of power so, really, he had no one to blame but himself.

Jeongin took a few seconds to contemplate his options before ultimately choosing to kill poor Jisung. Changbin felt a little sorry for the other rapper. He just couldn’t seem to catch a break when it came to playing games with the members. Although, he always gave an entertaining reaction, throwing his hands in the air and complaining in a high pitched voice. Changbin could understand the appeal of picking on him, as long as it didn’t go too far.

As nighttime ended, the boys all lifted their heads. Some rubbed at their hands, the skin red from continuously slapping the floor. Most stared at Changbin, eager to find out who had died.

“The sun has risen, bringing with it some terrible news,” he started, clasping his hands together in fake grief. He met each of the members’ eyes one by one. He nearly lost it when Jeongin had the nerve to wink at him but quickly recovered and moved on. He stretched the silence as long as he could, enjoying the amount of power he held over his members.

Unfortunately, Hyunjin couldn’t take the suspense.

“Just tell us who died, you ass!”

Changbin frowned, folding his arms over his chest and raising an eyebrow in the younger man’s direction.

“Just tell us, Changbin.” Chan interrupted, failing to hide his growing smile. “Please?”

“Fine,” the rapper relented, drawing the word out. “The mafia chose to kill Han Jisung. You’re out. Sorry buddy.”

Immediately, the boy let out a shriek of betrayal. He jumped to his feet, jaw dropped in shock. “Are you kidding me?!”

Changbin could only shrug sheepishly.

Jisung threw his hands up and groaned, letting them drop back down to rest in his hair. Around him, the members were trying their very best to stifle their laughter.

“This is why I don’t like playing games with you guys! You _always_ bully me! You guys suck.”

Finally, the members cracked, letting their laughter ring out as they clutched their aching bellies. Jisung tried to keep the upset facade going, but even he couldn’t stop the smile from spreading onto his face. Minho stood up from his spot and wrapped the pouty boy in a tight hug, completely shattering what was left of Jisung’s act. The younger boy let out a giggle as Minho buried his face into his neck.

It took a few minutes, but eventually they all calmed down, the laughter fading into wide grins and the occasional chuckle. Jisung had come to accept his fate, seemingly unbothered by his sudden death. He had moved to sit behind Minho, letting the older boy relax until his back was pressed up against Jisung’s chest with the rapper’s legs on either side. Jisung clasped his hands on Minho’s stomach, effectively trapping the man in their current position. Minho didn’t seem to mind though.

The rest of the “day” was spent discussing the possible mafia suspects. Minho barely contributed to the conversation other than to claim that Seungmin definitely wasn’t mafia. Hyunjin watched the argument carefully, trying to catch anyone slipping up and exposing themselves. However, Jeongin was careful. He threw random accusations everywhere, even accusing himself of being mafia at one point. Chan laughed at the youngest member, unaware that Seungmin was studying him with a suspicious glare.

Eventually though, the day ended the same as the first and night came. 

Changbin went through the motions: Hyunjin investigated Minho and learned he was the doctor, and Minho protected Seungmin again, completely certain that the younger boy was a civilian. When Changbin told the mafia to lift his head, Jeongin met the betrayed gaze of one Han Jisung. In his current position on Jisung’s lap, Minho hadn’t been able to lower his head to block his vision. Instead, Jisung used one hand to cover Minho’s eyes. Changbin had allowed it but watched the two of them carefully. In other words, Minho was blissfully unaware as Jisung stared down his murderer.

Jeongin seemed unapologetic yet offered up a sweet smile anyway. Jisung softened immediately, but jutted his chin at Minho before using his free hand to drag his thumb across his neck. The message was clear: _You kill Minho, I kill you_.

Jeongin lifted his hands in surrender and pointed at Hyunjin. Jisung shrugged, and the maknae took that as a sign of approval. He confirmed his decision with Changbin, who only sighed and declared that the night had ended.

As the boys all lifted their heads, Changbin leveled a sympathetic look on the mafia’s latest victim. Hyunjin caught on quickly, his face falling as he realized his time in the game was over.

For the benefit of the other members, who were oblivious to their non-verbal conversation, Changbin explained the situation: “The mafia struck once again. He decided to kill Hwang Hyunjin during the night.” Despite already knowing, the tall dancer seemed even more bummed by the news after hearing it aloud. His shoulders slouched and he pouted at the floor. Chan gave him a reassuring pat while Seungmin tracked the movement out of the corner of his eye.

The game continued as the remaining members discussed possible suspects. Hyunjin eventually accepted his death, leaning back on the couch behind him as he watched the chaos unfold. It seemed that Seungmin was not very subtle with his distrust of Chan because the dastardly mafia was using it to his advantage. Jeongin had started piling the accusations on their poor leader, claiming that he was an excellent liar and could easily deceive the rest of them into believing he was innocent. Chan protested between giggles, hands waving wildly as if he could ward off the maknae’s words.

Minho hardly participated, too busy stealing Jisung’s body heat as they cuddled. Meanwhile, Seungmin remained silent. He was listening to Jeongin sprout nonsense, the youngest member now insisting he was the detective and had investigated Chan the previous night. The Aussie attempted to refute his lies to no avail.

“Hyung is definitely mafia,” Seungmin finally stated, confident in his conclusion. “If Innie says he investigated him, then it has to be true. Hyung has also been acting real shady this entire game so it makes sense.”

“How have I been shady?!” Chan huffed, eyes wide with confusion. He had absolutely no idea what was going on, and Changbin pitied the poor fool. With a quick glance, he could see that Jisung shared his feelings. The leader turned his attention back to the maknae. “You’re making some wild accusations, Innie. I bet you’re actually the mafia and just want me out of the way!”

Accusing Jeongin was the wrong move. Immediately, Seungmin jumped to his friend’s defense.

“You’re seriously trying to blame Jeongin? He’s the only one here claiming to be the detective, so I see no reason not to believe him. You’re just desperate to pin it all on someone else.” The vocalist sniffed, crossing his arms in disapproval. His complete trust in Jeongin was blinding him to the truth, which was exactly why Changbin had chosen the maknae as the mafia. He was a dastardly child with the ultimate power over his whipped hyungs, and he most definitely knew how to use it at his convenience.

“What?!” Chan’s jaw dropped in disbelief. It seemed he had expected Seungmin to agree with his logical argument and was completely blindsided by his betrayal.

“So, we know for sure that Chan hyung is one of the mafias,” Jeongin spoke, ignoring the frustrated groan Chan let out. “We just have to vote him out and we’ll win.”

“Exactly.” Seungmin nodded along with Jeongin’s reasoning, fully convinced that he had discovered the correct identity of the mafia.

Seeing the crushing defeat coming a mile away, Changbin tried to take pity on his leader, stepping in quickly.

“Night time is coming. You have thirty seconds.”

The rapper hoped his warning would stop the trial before it even started, but it only made the evil mafia maknae work faster.

“We only need a majority vote to put someone on trial. Who thinks Chan should go?” Jeongin spoke hastily, tripping over his words in his effort to beat Changbin’s thirty second time limit. Immediately, Seungmin raised his hand alongside the mafia. Chan obviously refrained from joining them, but Minho, who had stopped paying attention once Jisung started stroking the hair on his head, saw a bunch of hands in the air and, like a lone sheep following the herd, did the same.

“Chan hyung is on trial. Who thinks he’s guilty of being a mafia?” Jeongin asked almost as fast as Changbin spat rap verses, keeping his hand in the air. Of course, he was joined by Seungmin. Minho, who still wasn’t paying attention, kept his hand raised because everyone else was.

The vote was unanimous.

“Well, shit.” Changbin muttered under his breath. He had tried to stop the evil maknae, but it was no use. He was too powerful. Now, poor Chan had been killed off, leaving only two innocents against the tricky mafia.

“Bang Chan was put on trial and voted guilty of being mafia. His punishment is death. Do you have any last words?” Changbin asked, turning to watch as his leader sighed with his head against the floor.

“This is why none of you would last a single day without me.”

Jisung and Hyunjin protested loudly, startling Minho who was half asleep. Seungmin rolled his eyes while Jeongin struggled to keep his grin hidden.

“Bang Chan was actually an innocent civilian. Great job guys. You’re all murderers.”

Changbin had to give it to Jeongin. He was a great actor.

The maknae immediately schooled his face into a shocked expression, eyes wide and sparkling. He masked his secret glee way too well, leading Changbin to wonder just how often he had to act innocent to get out of punishment.

Meanwhile, Seungmin was too stunned to speak, his mouth opening and closing like a dying fish out of water. The vocalist was utterly gobsmacked that he had been duped into killing one of his allies. His eyebrows were furrowed in disbelief as he stared at Chan who was still splayed out across the floor, his expression peaceful as he embraced fake death.

Minho, of course, did not care. Jisung was now braiding individual strands of his hair.

Changbin calmed everyone down, which mainly consisted of snapping Seungmin out of his trance and waking Minho up with a quick flick to the forehead. He declared that night was upon them, waited for the remaining players to lower their heads, and asked the doctor to save someone.

Minho glared at Bin for a moment, rubbing the red spot on his forehead, before turning his attention to the maknaes. Since he believed Seungmin was innocent, it was fairly straightforward for him to deduce that the youngest member was the mafia. Once he realized that, he came to the conclusion that the game had been over before it even began.

Jisung seemed to understand Minho’s thought process, leaning down to offer his own advice.

Changbin was able to read the boy’s lips easy enough: “Save yourself.”

Minho pondered the idea, sparing a glance at Seungmin.

After a second or two, the dancer shrugged the best he could with a wild Jisung wrapped around his torso and pointed towards himself.

 _How selfless_ , Changbin thought, snorting.

Then, Minho lowered his head and the mafia looked up.

Chan seemed to sense the change because he shot up, eyes scanning the circle until they met with the sheepish smile of his youngest member. If he was surprised, he didn’t show it. He glared at Jeongin for a moment before dragging his thumb across his neck and laying back down.

For the first time during the game, the mischievous kid looked nervous.

He shook it off quickly, though. He didn’t even need to think about his choice, automatically pointing at an oblivious Seungmin. Changbin sighed and nodded while Jeongin didn’t even bother lowering his head again.

The rapper called for the night to be over. Seungmin looked up, his blank expression revealing that he had already given up on the game.

“I’ll just come right out and say it---Seungmin was killed,” Changbin admitted. He crossed his arms and turned to Jeongin, trying his best to fight the growing smile on his face. “There is only one civilian left with one mafia. In other words, the mafia wins. Congrats you little demon.”

Seungmin nodded along with the news that he had been killed, and when Jeongin leapt to his feet to do a little victory dance, his expression didn’t change. The poor kid looked broken inside. Changbin knew that being manipulated by the maknae could do that to you.

Minho giggled softly, clapping for the younger member’s success. Jisung, Hyunjin, and Chan appeared almost as dejected as Seungmin. Changbin felt kind of guilty as he watched them mope, knowing that he had given the evil child the opportunity to take over the game. However, Jeongin couldn’t stop smiling, his grin spreading from ear to ear. Call him sappy, but the sight of the younger boy so happy quickly pushed the guilt away and brought a small smile to Changbin’s face.

At least he wasn’t alone, though. A quick glance around the room told him the maknae’s joy was contagious. Even Seungmin had his lips pulled into a small smirk.

The boys continued on with the game, playing six more rounds with a different moderator each time. The only role Changbin didn’t have was the doctor, but he was mafia twice, only winning the round during which Minho and Jisung were hellbent on getting each other voted out. They all had plenty of fun, laughing until their stomachs hurt. Eventually though, the game got a tad bit boring.

So, they moved on to hide and seek.

Since their dorm was smaller than a normal house or even the JYP building, the boys decided to expand the playing area as much as possible. They also wanted to blindfold the seeker to make it somewhat challenging.

Chan volunteered to go first, stealing a scarf from Jisung’s closet and wrapping it around his eyes. He stood in the middle of the room while the rest of the boys scattered. Changbin quietly pulled the couch forward and squeezed behind it. He hoped that Chan wouldn’t notice the new gap between the wall and the furniture.

Once he was settled, the rapper peeked his head out and watched the rest of his members scramble. Hyunjin jumped on top of a small table next to a chair, standing all the way up until his head touched the ceiling. Minho chose to hide underneath the curtains on the window despite the fact that they were too short to cover his entire body. Jeongin giggled at the dancer’s predicament from his spot next to the chair. He wasn’t hiding, really, but he had socks on so he could easily escape Chan without being heard.

Meanwhile, Seungmin sat himself on one of the kitchen counters. He kicked his feet like a child, eye-smile out full force. Despite what they had decided before starting the game, it seemed that the young vocalist was the only one that chose to hide somewhere outside of the living room.

Finally, Jisung found himself a spot. He picked up the cushions of the couch and laid down, setting them on top of him. Changbin could only shake his head. Jisung sucked at every game the group played because he had horrible judgement that led to unfavorable situations … like this, for example.

Before he could call the younger out for being too close, Chan finished spinning in circles and counting down from thirty. Changbin snapped his mouth shut, not wanting to give their position away. He could only sit back and hope Jisung wasn’t going to screw them both.

Chan started moving forwards as if he was drunk, the spinning really taking a toll on his sense of balance and direction. His hands were out and his feet shuffled along. He moved slowly, a couple centimeters at a time. Obviously, he didn’t want to bump into anything.

The guys barely held their giggles in as Chan’s hands met the front of the tv, startling him. He felt around and quickly figured out where he was. Then, he turned to his left, where Jeongin was positioned.

The  maknae immediately suppressed his laughter and prepared to move in case  Chan got too close. The blindfolded  leader shuffled forward quicker than he had been, confident in his surroundings. This seemed to take  Jeongin off guard, forcing the  boy to practically jump out of the way  when Chan came barreling by. As his socked feet hit the floor, they made a soft thump.

Like a zombie from Train to Busan, Chan stopped all movement and cocked his head. He slowly spun around, a large grin making its way onto his face.

Changbin had to clap a hand over his mouth to keep silent as he watched a blinded Chan stalk Jeongin, who was crouching close to the ground. It seriously looked like a low budget nature documentary following a ravenous kangaroo hunting its skittish fox prey.

Chan stopped suddenly, his hands still held out in front of him. He tilted his head as he tried to hear any movement. Jeongin held his position, arms and legs underneath him with his knees against his chest. Changbin couldn’t tell from the current distance but he swore that the maknae was holding his breath.

Out of nowhere, Chan jumped forward, his hands swinging in a big circle in front of him. He balanced on one leg and used the other to sweep across the floor. Jeongin scrambled out of reach, falling back on his butt and creating a large thud. Chan grinned like a mad man.

The Aussie native dove in and tackled Jeongin as he tried to crawl away, wrapping himself around their maknae as he shrieked.

“NO! Have mercy!” he pleaded, recreating every horror movie by reaching out and clawing at the ground to find purchase. Chan was too strong, however, and he pulled Jeongin back and into his lap. He had a firm grip around Jeongin’s stomach, refusing to let go no matter how desperately the boy yanked on his hands.

“You’re mine now!” Chan giggled, happily snuggling his face into Jeongin’s back.

Jeongin tried once more, twisting in Chan’s arms in an attempt at freedom, but it was futile. Eventually, he gave up and leaned all of his weight back on the leader.

“My Innie!” Chan squealed, tightening his hold on the maknae. Eventually, Jeongin managed to pry the strong arms from around him and collapsed onto the ground, gasping for air as if he had been drowning. Knowing full well that the vocalist was just being dramatic, Chan snorted, no doubt rolling his eyes behind the blindfold.

“Don’t try to guilt trip me, Innie. You’re out, and you know it.” The leader crossed his arms with a raised eyebrow, practically challenging Jeongin to disagree.

“Fine,” Jeongin huffed. “You got me. I don’t understand  _ how _ though! I was so quiet!”

Chan shrugged, his lopsided smile just barely visible under the bottom edge of the scarf. “I could smell you.”

Changbin managed to swallow his cackle, and he noticed Seungmin throwing his head back as he did the same. However, Hyunjin seemed to have forgotten the rules of the game.

“HA! Chan hyung just called you stinky!”

Immediately, Chan spun around to face the tall dancer, already leaping to his feet as he stumbled towards him.

Hyunjin screamed loudly, picking one foot off the table he stood on as if Chan was a mouse scuttling along the floor. Changbin didn’t blame him. Chan shuffled towards the terrified boy faster than he had ever moved before, leaving Hyunjin no time to escape. As soon as his outstretched hands brushed against the younger’s sweatpant clad leg, Chan grabbed onto it. Luckily, he didn’t pull or Hyunjin would’ve fallen right off the table.

Instead, he let his free hand reach higher until he found the dancer’s hand and gently guided him off the table. Once on the floor, Hyunjin groaned and collapsed, finally accepting defeat but not at all happy about it.

“I had such a good spot too! I’m so dumb!” he wailed, throwing an arm over his eyes like a damsel in distress.

Changbin felt the cushions on the couch rustle slightly and his blood ran cold.

_He wouldn’t … right?_

“I’ve been telling you that for years!”

As soon as the words left Jisung’s mouth, Changbin leaned over the couch, reached past the cushions, and slapped him in the side of the head.

“Ouch, hyung! What was that for?!”

Changbin slunk back into his spot, his forehead resting in his hand. He didn’t even need to peek over the couch to know what happened next. He just hoped Chan wouldn’t find him as well.

The sounds of shuffling socks on the floor were quickly followed by Jisung’s startled yelp and the squeaking of couch cushions. Only a moment later, Jisung began complaining.

“Hyunjin hyung! You got me out!”

“What?! You’re the idiot who talked!”

“So did you---!”

“You both screwed up! Next game, you won’t. Now be quiet,” Chan thankfully interrupted. His tone held no room for discussion, and the two boys kept their mouths shut.

In the moments that followed, a tense silence befell the room. No one spoke, and Changbin was about to take a peek to find out why when he felt a shadow fall over him. He looked up and almost choked on his own breath.

Chan had climbed onto the sofa and was now reaching out towards the wall. When all he felt was open air, his smile grew, and Changbin knew he was done for. Chan was well aware that their couch was normally pushed right up against the wall. Now, there was a person-shaped gap there instead.

The leader didn’t even hesitate, falling against the back of the couch as his hands reached down into the gap. His hands grazed Changbin’s arm and hair, forcing an embarrassing squeak from his throat. Knowing he had been found, the rapper offered his hands and allowed Chan to pull him out from his spot.

As soon as he was in the middle of the room, Changbin sent a murderous glare Jisung’s way. At least the boy had the sense to look apologetic.

The rest of the game went quickly with Chan stumbling over to Seungmin right after finding Changbin. He had been alerted to the vocalist’s hiding place when his heel swung too far backward and thunked against the lower cabinet door. The speed at which Chan cranked his head around gave _Changbin_ whiplash.

Minho, who was still camped out underneath the curtains, won that round. He claimed it was the hardest game he’d played in a while.

“I’ve never struggled to hold in laughter that much before,” he had said, sending meaningful looks in Hyunjin and Jisung’s directions. They both flipped him off.

They went on to play a few more rounds, making sure that everyone had the chance to be the seeker. They managed to finish without breaking anything---if one didn’t count the possible fracture a blinded Minho’s toe received when he accidentally kicked the corner of the tv stand. By the time they called it quits, it was nearing one in the afternoon.

Chan and Jisung disappeared into the kitchen to start making lunch, and the rest of the boys scattered across the living room. Normally, they would’ve disappeared into their own rooms, but it was obvious that none of them really wanted to be alone at the moment. They were all doing their own thing, content with a lazy day at the dorms.

All except for Hyunjin, however.

He declared that he was craving street vendor tteokbokki, deciding that he wanted Seungmin and Changbin to join him. Seungmin got up almost immediately, grabbing a winter coat and his shoes as if he was on autopilot. Changbin was surprised that Hyunjin even wanted him along. Usually, it was just Hyunjin and Seungmin together. They were practically attached at the hip. Now, though, Hyunjin was trying to forcibly drag Changbin towards the door by his hand.

It’s not like he didn’t want to go. At the mere mention of tteokbokki, Changbin felt his stomach growl and his mouth water. Plus, Hyunjin and Seungmin weren’t overwhelming the way MinSung could be sometimes. Changbin enjoyed spending time with them. There was only one thing holding him back.

“Shouldn’t we ask Chan hyung first?”

Hyunjin stopped pulling at the rapper’s arm long enough to pout.

“What’s the big deal? We’re traveling in a group of three.”

Changbin shrugged the best he could with his outstretched arm still held tight in Hyunjin’s grip. “He’ll want to know. We shouldn’t just leave without telling him.”

The dancer sighed, his shoulders drooping. He finally released Changbin, giving him a stern look.

“If you ask Chan and he says we can’t go, I’m blaming you.”

Then, the younger boy spun around and made his way over to the door, where Seungmin was waiting. Changbin snorted, amused at his dongsaeng’s dramatics. He knew Hyunjin didn’t really mean it. The boy was just stir crazy. It was hard, being locked in their dorms all day every day to avoid the press. It hadn’t been that long, but it was definitely getting to them. Changbin could understand Hyunjin’s desire to go out, even if it was just for food.

But Chan still needed to know.

Changbin heard soft laughter as he neared the kitchen, the sound bringing a smile to his lips. He guessed that Jisung was doing something dumb to make Chan giggle.

When he peeked his head inside, he barely suppressed a snort. Jisung was crouched in the corner of the room, a spatula held in his hands as if it was a gun with a pot on his head. His back was against the cabinets and he shouted nonsense orders in a gruff voice. Meanwhile, Chan was doubled over, clutching his stomach as he wheezed. Apparently, Jisung’s idiotic portrayal of war-hardened general was extremely funny to the eldest member.

Changbin didn’t want to interrupt the moment, but he needed to let Chan know that Hyunjin was making his escape. So, he stepped into the kitchen, clearing his throat.

“Hyung?”

Immediately, both men turned to look at him. Jisung jumped to his feet and tossed the spatula onto the counter next to him, acting as if he hadn’t just been pretending it was a weapon. The pot was still on his head, but he didn’t seem to notice. Chan was wiping tears from his eyes, but as he looked at Changbin, the rapper could tell his full attention was on him.

Shaking his head in amusement, Changbin ignored the embarrassment radiating off his dongsaeng.

“Chan hyung?” he asked. “I just wanted to know if Hyunjin, Seungmin, and I could go out for lunch today? We were craving street vendor tteokbokki.”

Chan’s amused expression quickly morphed into one of concern, his eyebrows furrowing as he bit the inside of his cheek. He spared a glance at Jisung, who had sobered up quickly, his sheepish smile dimming into a grimace.

Changbin felt horrible. He didn’t mean to destroy the good mood the two had managed to create, but now the air was thick with tension as his leader contemplated his request. Any and all laughter that had filled the room only minutes earlier was now gone, replaced with an uncomfortable silence. The rapper wanted to take it all back, but he knew it was too late. At this point, he might as well try to convince Chan to say yes.

“It’s just a quick trip to the nearest market,” he reasoned. Chan nodded once, but he still looked hesitant. “We can all wear masks and hats to block any press. Besides, we’re traveling in a group of three so we can watch each other’s backs. We’re all adults---we can take care of ourselves, Hyung.”

Chan raised his hands in a placating gesture. He met Changbin’s eye, his gaze filled with worry and the slightest hint of fear.

“I know, I know. It’s not that I don’t trust you guys … I don’t trust the press and the sasaengs camped out in front of our building. They want nothing more than to catch us unaware and vulnerable.” The Stray Kids leader sighed heavily through his nose, his chest expanding with the force of it. He closed his eyes and leaned back against the counter behind him. Jisung, who had been surprisingly quiet the entire time, copied his movements and finally realized the pot was still on his head, hastily taking it off.

Changbin knew that  Chan’s mind was racing with worse-case scenarios, and he could only hope  the leader would be able to look past them. Hyunjin would always comply with his  oldest hyung’s requests, even if they involved him staying in the dorms he was quickly growing sick of. However, Changbin knew the  dancer wouldn’t be able to last much longer without fresh air and a long walk to stretch his legs.

It seemed Chan had come to the same conclusion.

“You can go,” he declared, opening his eyes to glare at the rapper across from him as he continued. “ _But_ you will stay together, cover your faces, and keep your phones on you at all times. If I text one of you, I expect an immediate answer, got it?”

Changbin perked up, unable to stop a large smile from forming. He rocked back and forth on his heels as he listened intently.

Chan chuckled lightly at the rapper’s instant mood change, but he didn’t pause his lecture for very long.

“After you get your food, you will bring it back here to eat. It shouldn’t get cold if you walk fast enough. Also---and this goes without saying---absolutely _no_ detours. You are to go directly to the market and back. Keep your heads down. Do you understand?”

Changbin nodded quickly, already backing out of the kitchen. “Yes, Hyung. I promise I’ll watch after the kids. Don’t worry about us. And thank you!”

The rapper sped out of the room, an extra skip in his step. He was gone before he could hear Chan mutter something softly under his breath: “How can I not worry about my own family?”

Changbin turned the corners on socked feet so fast he drifted, but it got him to the front door quicker. Hyunjin and Seungmin were, luckily, still waiting for him, their coats and shoes already on. As he skidded into the room, they lifted their heads. As soon as they laid eyes on Changbin’s excited grin, they knew what Chan’s answer had been.

“Let’s go!” Hyunjin shrieked, bursting out through the door without giving Changbin a chance to catch up. Seungmin was more considerate, and he stayed back to watch as his hyung got prepared to head outside. When they finally stepped out of the dorm and into the hallway, Hyunjin was impatiently waiting for them near the staircase.

“C’mon! I want my tteokbokki!” he pouted, crossing his arms as if it would magically make his two companions move quicker. Seungmin sighed through his nose, but Changbin could see the corners of his mouth lifting ever so slightly. The vocalist was incredibly soft for his taller hyung despite how hard he tried to hide it.

Hyunjin decided that Seungmin and Binnie were taking way too long to join him, so he took matters into his own hands. He skipped over to his companions, looping an arm through each one of theirs and started pulling them forward. Seungmin was protesting the entire way through the building and out onto the street, but Changbin couldn’t be bothered. He was too busy trying to calm his gigantic smile.

It took a little less than ten minutes to reach the street market. Luck seemed to be on their side at the moment because they hadn’t run into any reporters yet. Hyunjin was still dragging the other two along, way too excited to walk at a normal pace. Changbin wondered how the boy could even see with his bucket hat pulled as low as it was. He almost didn’t need to wear a mask, half his entire face being covered already.

Changbin and Seungmin, however, opted for a more comfortable combination of baseball caps and thin masks. They looked slightly suspicious, but none of the street vendors seemed to mind. They were more concerned with selling their food or produce than who they were selling it to.

The street was crowded with hungry customers and the tantalizing scents of delicious meals. Changbin felt Hyunjin let go of his arm, and looked over to his left to see Seungmin had been freed as well. Since they had arrived at their destination, the dancer saw no need to drag them along. Plus, the three idols had plenty of experience navigating dense masses of people, so they didn’t need to hold on to each other to stay close.

Although, as soon as they broke apart, Seungmin caught up with the eager Hyunjin, and they began walking side-by-side. Immediate conversation flowed between the two as they debated which vendor they should visit. They never spared a glance over their shoulder to check if their third companion was following. Changbin kept the pace easy enough, but all of a sudden it felt like he had been forgotten.

He didn’t know why he was so surprised. Obviously, Hyunjin must’ve wanted this to be an outing for Seungmin and him only. When he had seen Changbin moping around with nothing to do, he probably felt bad and invited him to join. That seemed to be a very common occurrence ever since Felix was taken from them.

Changbin and Felix were somewhat attached at the hip. One was never seen without the other too far behind. At first, Changbin had spent so much time with Felix because Chan had asked him to. The leader was incredibly busy during their trainee days, and Felix still didn’t know the other members that well. Once Changbin realized just how fun and sweet his dongsaeng was, he went out of his way to be there for him. Felix never pushed him away, so he assumed that the younger enjoyed their time together as much as he did.

Now, the person that he had become so dependent on was gone, and until they got him back, Changbin felt lost.

That’s why his members had been sending him more and more worried looks as of late. They were trying their best to drag him out of the studio and his bedroom where he holed up. They had to remind him to eat---otherwise he would forget. He knew it wasn’t healthy, what he was doing, but he didn’t know what else _to_ do. If he couldn’t help the detectives find his Felix, then he was going to try and appease JYP by producing more songs. He had to be useful somehow.

Changbin came to the conclusion that Hyunjin had deemed it necessary to bring him along just to get him away from the dorms, but now that they were outside, he didn’t have to babysit him anymore. The whole situation made the rapper feel like nothing more than an annoying toddler.

In other words, he felt like a huge burden.

“Bin hyung?!”

Hyunjin’s loud voice shook him out of his stupor. Changbin had been too deep into his self-deprecating thoughts to realize that he had stopped walking, allowing Hyunjin and Seungmin to get too far ahead of him. He whipped his head around as he searched for them, his gut roiling with panic.

Fortunately, he spotted Hyunjin’s obnoxious bucket hat poking out from the crowd fairly quickly. For once, he was glad that Hyunjin was so much taller than him. Changbin started pushing through the masses of people to get to his dongsaengs but stopped short when he got close enough to see them clearly.

The dancer had called out to him again, still trying to find his smaller hyung. He was almost hysterical as he scanned the crowd with wide eyes. Beside him, Seungmin was doing his best to calm Hyunjin. Although, the vocalist didn’t look all that relaxed either. The two of them were starting to gather strange looks from the people passing by, and Changbin knew he had to step in before they gained too much attention.

“Hey! Hey, I’m right here,” he whisper-shouted once he got within hearing distance. Immediately, Hyunjin and Seungmin spun around to face him, their entire bodies going slack with relief. Changbin stepped closer, already attempting to ease their stress with soothing words, but he was cut off as soon as his mouth opened. Hyunjin had scooped him up into a bone-crushing hug while Seungmin clung tightly onto the back of his coat.

If he could breathe, Changbin would’ve returned the hug. However, he didn’t want to pass out in his dongsaeng’s arms and send the crowd around him into a panic, so he tapped Hyunjin’s back until he let go.

Gasping down a breath of air, he said, “I’m sorry guys. I got a little lost in my head.”

Seungmin’s still concerned eyes softened as Changbin tried to apologize, the vocalist obviously just happy that he was safe. Hyunjin grabbed his hyung’s hands and squeezed. Changbin let him, knowing that the dancer had always been far more comforted by affectionate touches than reassuring words.

“It’s okay,” he sighed, shoulders sagging as he slowly relaxed. Changbin rubbed his thumb along the boy’s knuckles, eliciting a big smile that made his eyes form into crescents behind the mask. “I’m just glad you’re okay. I’m sorry for walking ahead of you. Seungmin and I should’ve been paying more attention. We were just a bit distracted by all the food.”

“We thought you were right beside Hyunjin, so we kind of panicked when we asked you a question only to realize you weren’t there,” Seungmin added, pulling his coat sleeves down over his hands until just his fingers poked out. The embarrassed flush of his skin reached his ears, which weren’t covered by the ball cap.

“If you were a bit taller, we probably would’ve found you a little easier,” Hyunjin teased, his eyes squeezing even tighter as he giggled. Seungmin gasped and landed a painful looking blow on the dancer’s shoulder, causing him to pull his hands out of Changbin’s grip to defend himself. Seeing Hyunjin cower as Seungmin rained sweater paw punches down on him had their rapper hyung struggling to hold in his laughter.

Suddenly, Changbin felt like the biggest idiot. His dongsaengs had gone mad with worry when they realized he wasn’t walking with them. They had nearly given away their identities in order to find him. Obviously, they hadn’t forgotten about him. For Changbin to even entertain the idea proved that he didn’t have nearly enough faith in them. His entire group had been trying their damned hardest to ease his pain ever since Felix went missing, knowing very well that the two of them were closer than the rest. Changbin’s own self-critical thoughts prevented him from viewing the situation from their perspective.

If the roles were reversed, the rapper would be jumping at the chance to help his members cope with their stress. In fact, he had been a shoulder to cry on for all of his members throughout the entirety of their survival show. Helping the boys he considered family gave him more gratification than any award or achievement he could ever earn. He realized now that his members felt the exact same way. They wanted to be _his_ support system for once. He couldn’t be a burden on them no matter how hard he tried.

They all loved him way too much for that.

“Let’s go get some tteokbokki.”

At his hyung’s suggestion, Seungmin finally stopped torturing poor Hyunjin. He looped his arm through Changbin’s in a rare show of physical affection. Hyunjin glared at the vocalist for a moment before ultimately following his lead and attaching himself to Changbin’s other side.

The trio made their way through the crowd, gawking at all the different types of food without letting a centimeter separate them. Eventually, they decided to buy their stir-fried rice cakes from a booth with a smaller line, knowing that they were running short on time before Chan came searching for them. They were served by a kind old man with an adorable, contagious smile. He packaged their meals together so they could carry them home, sending them off with a little wave.

Seungmin insisted on carrying the bag of food, his free hand sliding out of Changbin’s arm so he could hold his hand. Hyunjin was still hanging off of the rapper’s other side, but he couldn’t find it in himself to complain. The warmth of his dongsaengs brought immediate comfort as the trio slipped out of the crowd and made their way home.

They chatted softly as they walked, the excitement of getting back to the dorms and digging into their tteokbokki making them move a bit faster than normal.

Looking back, Changbin wished they had sprinted. Maybe then they would’ve been able to avoid the chaos awaiting them.

As soon as the three idols turned onto their street, they paused. In front of the dorm building was a massive group of press, their vehicles parked off to the side. They were idly conversing amongst themselves, trying to pass the time as they waited for one of the members to make an appearance.

Changbin was filled with a sense of anger he had only felt once before, when he watched the film of Felix’s kidnapping. These reporters were doing nothing short of _harassing_ the boys for a meager photo or comment they would never get. They were treating the entire situation like some sort of circus show.

Hyunjin was gripping Changbin’s arm tight enough to bruise, but he barely felt it. Seungmin’s hand had gone clammy in his, but Changbin didn’t notice. All he could see was the group of press and the six foot gap they had left between them and the dorm building’s front entrance.

“We’re going to have to push through to get inside,” Changbin mumbled. His dongsaengs couldn’t tear their eyes away from the intimidating mass of reporters, but they nodded along. “They’re going to get in your face, but you just have to ignore them and keep your head down. Tune them out. Keep your focus on putting one foot ahead of the other and breathing steadily, alright? I’ll guide us into the building. You two just need to keep holding on to me. Okay?”

Seungmin took a shaky breath, but he nodded, finally turning to face Changbin. There was a look of determination paired with anger in his eyes. Hyunjin still couldn’t rip his gaze off the group of press, but his jaw clenched as his arm wrapped even tighter around Changbin’s. The rapper faced ahead once again.

They started walking.

They only made it halfway down the street before one of the reporters spotted them. Despite having their faces covered, they were recognized immediately. The next moment, there were what seemed like hundreds of cameras and microphones shoved into their personal space. They were speed walking, but the press kept up with them just fine, trotting along as they shouted questions. Fortunately, no one tried grabbing onto the idols just yet, or Changbin might have lost it right then and there. He was close to stealing one of those infuriating cameras and throwing it into the street. Only Hyunjin and Seungmin’s bruising grip on him kept him calm.

When Chan had confessed after the press conference with the detectives that he had pictured the reporters as rabid wolves pouncing on a piece of raw meat, Changbin’s reaction was to laugh. The image that had popped into his head at the time was absolutely ridiculous. Now, however, the rapper could see why Chan had likened them to something so vicious.

They were only a few strides away from the building when Changbin felt an unfamiliar hand grab onto his coat, wrenching him backward. He managed to stay on his feet with the help of Hyunjin and Seungmin, but the block over his ears he had carefully crafted was broken. Now, he could hear every single question being thrown his way.

“How are the members dealing with their loss?”

“What do you know of the progression of the investigation?”

“Is there anything you would like to say to the kidnappers?”

“Have you moved on as a group?”

“Are you celebrating your member’s disappearance?”

“Is there any talk about giving up the search?”

Changbin’s breath came out in gasps as he pushed his dongsaengs towards the building’s entrance. He pried the doors open and roughly forced the two younger boys through, following immediately after. He didn’t stop dragging Hyunjin and Seungmin away from the reporters until they had left the lobby and were safely surrounded by the solid walls of the stairwell. Only then did Changbin release them.

The silence was filled with nothing but heavy breathing. Hyunjin had sat down on the landing, curling up into a small ball with his head in his knees. Seungmin was holding onto the tteokbokki bag so tight his knuckles were white as he rested the back of his head on the cool wall. Changbin leaned heavily on the railing, ripping his hat off so he could run his fingers through his mussed up hair.

They all took a minute to just breathe. Changbin closed his eyes only to snap them open, the flashing of cameras still ever present behind closed eyelids.

“Hyung?” came a small voice. Changbin barely heard it, but with his senses in overdrive, he couldn’t have missed it.

It was Seungmin, who had been watching his hyung with wide eyes. He was trembling slightly, but he hardly seemed to notice.

“Yeah?” Changbin prompted, his voice raspy. He tried to sound somewhat soothing, but it was fruitless. They were all effectively traumatized by what they had just experienced. There was no hiding it.

“Are you okay?” he asked. At that, Hyunjin lifted his head, scanning Changbin with a frightened look. Both boys were watching him, waiting for a response. The fact that their first concern was _Changbin_ and not themselves was overwhelming to him. If he hadn’t been standing on shaky legs, he would’ve gathered them into a huge group hug.

As it was, Changbin couldn’t prevent the chuckle from leaving his lips.

It had an immediate effect, causing the tension to visibly drain from his dongsaengs, leaving confusion in its wake.

“I’m fine, just a little rattled,” he admitted. Their glances strayed from him to each other and back again. They still looked worried. “Why?”

Seungmin adjusted the tteokbokki bag in his hands, breaking eye contact as he stumbled through his words. “Well, I felt you pull away from us, and I thought you had tripped or something. I just didn’t want you hurting yourself to get away from … them.”

Hyunjin nodded along, once again scanning Changbin for injuries.

“No, I didn’t trip. One of them grabbed me and yanked me backwards. I’m okay, I promise.”

It was quiet for a minute as the boys processed Changbin’s admission. The second they seemed to understand that a particularly desperate member of the press had laid a hand on their hyung, the tension in the air swelled to an all time high. Seungmin’s shy concern was immediately replaced by absolute fury. He set the tteokbokki bag down and started towards the stairs, jaw set and eyes frighteningly cold. Hyunjin was faster, however, and he launched to his feet, effectively putting himself between Seungmin and the reporters most likely still crowded at the building’s entrance.

“No, Minnie. You can’t go back down there,” the dancer tried to reason, using his body as a barrier. Seungmin tried to sidestep him, his fists balled and his ears growing redder by the second.

“They can’t just _grab_ him like that, Jin. He’s not some _prop_ they can just throw around! They need to get that through their fucking heads!” Seungmin seethed. He struggled against Hyunjin desperately, halfheartedly pounding his chest with his closed fists. Hyunjin whispered something in his ear, which seemed to calm him slightly.

“We can always take legal action later, but right now, we need to get back to the dorms. I’m sure Channie hyung is worried sick.”

Seungmin had pulled his mask down as soon as they entered the stairwell in order to breathe freely, so the tears now gathering in his eyes and rolling down his cheeks were visible. Hyunjin swallowed thickly, finding Changbin’s heartbroken gaze as he held onto Seungmin. He motioned towards the sniffling vocalist with a jerk of his head, and Changbin knew what he was asking without it being spoken.

“Minnie?” he called, taking a few steps toward his dongsaeng. Seungmin stopped fighting at the sound of his voice, turning to watch as the rapper came closer. “Minnie, you don’t have to go fight the press for me. I don’t want you to get hurt. But, I would really like a hug if that’s okay---.”

Changbin didn’t even get to finish before Seungmin was wrapped around him. Hyunjin followed soon after, the two pairs of arms surrounding Changbin and squeezing him firmly. He managed to return the gesture with one arm around each boy. He had to stare up at the ceiling to fight the oncoming tears which opened a spot up against his throat that his dongsaengs gladly shoved their faces into. His neck was wet with salty tears, but he couldn’t care less. He was too busy enjoying the comforting warmth of his brothers as he held them close, his heart rate finally slowing to a normal rhythm.

As lovely as the moment was, Changbin realized that Hyunjin had been right. Chan and the rest of the members had most likely heard the commotion caused by the swarm of reporters, and he was probably losing his mind with worry. If he had seen the three idol’s disastrous dash to the building entrance, then he would already be on his way to find and check up on them. They should ease his stress as soon as possible.

“Let’s go see Channie hyung, hmm?” Changbin suggested in a soft voice. He was rubbing small circles into Hyunjin and Seungmin’s backs as he hugged them, knowing very well that Chan often did the same when any of his members were upset. It worked just as well as it always did, the two younger boys turning into exhausted putty in his arms.

Changbin waited until he got a hum of confirmation from both of them before relaxing his hold. Hyunjin immediately whined in protest, not wanting to lose the soothing warmth, but Changbin only chuckled. He spun them around so they were facing the staircase leading up, positioned himself in the middle of their trio, and rested his arms along their shoulders as he guided them forwards.

Changbin couldn’t tell if he was supporting the two younger boys or if they were supporting him. He had a gut feeling it was the latter. Either way, it didn’t take long to reach their dorms despite the sluggish, tired way they walked.

They stood in front of the door, and, with only a moment’s hesitation, entered the room.

“Hyung! They’re back!” Changbin heard Jeongin call from somewhere in the living room. He released his hold on Hyunjin and Seungmin, looking up to see a wild Jeongin sliding towards him on socked feet. The younger boy plowed into the rapper at full speed, wrapping his arms around him and squeezing. Changbin barely had time to return the hug before the little leech had moved on to Hyunjin and then Seungmin.

As Seungmin leaned into the embrace, leaving Jeongin shocked and very concerned, Changbin heard the clattering of a pan hitting the floor. In the split second following, the three remaining boys filed into view.

Chan’s face was wiped clean of emotion as he scanned his newly returned members. He seemed to be checking for any outward signs of injury or distress, and, finding none, allowed himself to relax the slightest bit. He met Changbin’s eyes, and the blank expression melted into a mixture of relief and fondness.

Jisung and Minho slipped past him, rushing to envelope Changbin and Hyunjin in suffocating hugs, but they didn’t mind. Finding Chan’s gaze again, Changbin wondered just how lucky he had to be to have such amazing brothers. Their leader had to be telepathic because he immediately seemed to understand that something _had_ happened while the trio was out grabbing food, yet he didn’t bring it up. Changbin had seen how distressed Seungmin had gotten after the whole ordeal, and he had a feeling that having to retell it would only get him worked up again. Chan had read the situation like a fucking book and instantly knew what his members needed: comfort from their family.

“Let me in there, guys!” The Aussie native whined, failing to keep the smile from his face. Jisung was squeezing the life out of Changbin, so Chan stepped in and wiggled his way between them. Both of them were laughing too hard to protest, so Chan dragged them over towards Hyunjin and Minho to do the exact same thing. When the massive group hug made its way over to Seungmin and Jeongin, they were more than willing to join. Changbin felt his jaw ache from grinning, but he ignored it. He was too busy trying to breathe as he found himself directly in the middle of the embrace, somehow replacing Chan who was now snuggled in next to Seungmin. His naturally noisy members were all shouting for no apparent reason as they clung to each other. By the time they let go, Changbin swore he was deaf.

“Go eat your tteokbokki,” Chan ordered, glancing pointedly at the trio. He gestured towards the rest of the members, continuing on. “We all ate lunch together so we’re waiting on you.”

Changbin chuckled sheepishly, as did Hyunjin. Seungmin merely shrugged.

Jisung broke in, taking the attention off the trio for a minute, “What are we waiting on them for? Are we playing another game?”

As fun as the games had been so far, just the thought of playing another one made Changbin inwardly groan. He wasn’t sure he could take all the yelling and physical exercise anymore. Luckily for him, Chan shook his head.

“No, I thought we could build a pillow fort and watch movies the rest of the day.”

Hyunjin and Jisung squawked like strangled birds. They burst into a flurry of movement with the dancer ripping the tteokbokki bag from Seungmin’s hands and sprinting into the kitchen while the rapper disappeared into his room, returning with an armful of pillows and blankets. Changbin felt his own excitement flood his body as he raced to join Hyunjin in the kitchen, Seungmin not too far behind him.

Considering the stress and fear they experienced in order to get the food, one would think they would try to enjoy it at least a little. Instead, the three members inhaled their stir-fried rice cakes as if they hadn’t eaten in years. It was blessedly still warm, so they didn’t have to choke it down, but they barely tasted it as they shoveled it down their throats. Hyunjin finished first, tossing his plastic bowl into the trash and practically flying back into the living room. Seungmin was only a few seconds after him. Changbin took a bit longer to make sure he didn’t lodge one of the rice cakes into his esophagus which, despite Chan’s beliefs, does not actually lead to the spinal cord.

Eventually, the rapper swallowed his final bite. He threw his trash away and trotted into the living room, hoping that his members hadn’t started without him. Fortunately, Hyunjin, Jeongin, and Jisung had delayed the start of their pillow fort construction with an argument over which blanket to use. Chan, seeing Changbin, stepped in and settled the dispute by telling them to use whatever the hell they wanted.

Then, they got to work.

Changbin was tasked with laying down the foundation which consisted of thick couch cushions. He laid a couple down side by side with a comfy electric blanket on top. As Minho plugged the blanket in, Changbin helped Chan set up the pillow fort walls. They drug a chair over to one end and used an extra cushion for the other. With the couch positioned at the back, they had three walls and a floor. Seungmin and Jeongin started layering the pillows inside the fort, making it extra comfy for their movie marathon later that night. Hyunjin and Jisung were working surprisingly well together, stretching several quilts and light duvets across the walls to create a roof. The blankets sagged a bit, but they didn’t obstruct the view of the TV from inside the fort, so it hardly mattered.

Finally, they had a complete pillow fort. The members stood back, admiring their work. Chan was the only one that seemed unsatisfied.

“Wait a moment,” he said before slipping back into Changbin and his room. He returned only moments later with a small white box in his hands. Changbin wanted to ask his leader what he was doing, but the question died on his tongue.

Chan had opened the box, pulling a coiled string of fairy lights out of it. He grinned widely as he carried them over to the fort.

“These are my sister’s lights. She wanted me to take them when I left so the dark couldn’t scare me.”

A pang of sadness resounded through Changbin’s heart. The sentiment was heartwarming, but it reminded the rapper of his home. If _he_ was feeling a bit nostalgic and homesick, he couldn’t fathom what Chan was experiencing.

No matter what emotions he was dealing with at the moment, Chan didn’t show it. Instead, a soft smile settled on his face as he strung the lights throughout the fort. Minho, their resident electrician, apparently, inserted the plug for the lights into the nearest outlet.

Instantly, the room was filled with a relaxing, honey-colored light. The fairy lights twinkled, turning their basic pillow fort into a comforting nest of fluffiness and warmth. With one glance at his other members, Changbin could tell that he wasn’t alone when the sight awakened some of his most cherished memories as a young child.

“I think we did it, boys.” Chan giggled as he watched the twinkling lights fill his members’ eyes. “What are you waiting for? Get in there!”

He didn’t have to say it twice. Hyunjin climbed inside first, Jisung and Jeongin pushing each other out of the way in order to be next. Seungmin slipped past the arguing boys and joined Hyunjin. Changbin fought a snort as Minho stepped in, slapping both of the unruly boys on the back of their heads and pushing them in the fort himself. He crawled in right after.

Changbin felt Chan’s hand settle on his shoulder, and he spared a glance at the Aussie native. 

The pure joy radiating from his crescent shaped eyes was a sight Changbin had nearly forgotten. It had been too long since Chan had been so happy and carefree. With all the stress and anxiety they had been dealing with recently, just the knowledge that his leader was finally able to relax for once made the widest, cheesiest grin take over Changbin’s face.

Chan chuckled at Changbin’s display. He then used his hand on the rapper’s shoulder to guide him towards the fort. Together, they climbed inside, joining their members in the padded structure.

There was a surprising amount of room left over, even with all seven members packed inside. They had several centimeters between their heads and the blanket roof as well as the space to lay down side by side like sardines crammed into a can. They opted to sit with their legs crossed, with Jisung and Minho snuggled together in the corner.

As Chan tried to settle the growing argument over which movie to start with, Changbin let his gaze travel along the lines of fairy lights adorning the fort’s walls and roof. Even up close, they weren’t bright enough to hurt his eyes. He watched them fade in and out, which gave them the illusion of twinkling stars. The color they emanated reminded him of a flame in a candle. The rapper could understand why Chan’s sister believed the lights could protect her brother---they were just so soothing.

By the time Changbin ripped his attention from the comforting decorations, the bickering over movies had stopped. Jeongin and Hyunjin had finally managed to compromise: they would start with Hyunjin’s favorite drama series and end the night with the Marvel movies, as Jeongin requested.

Changbin grabbed a nearby pillow, tucking it into his lap as he hugged it close. Hyunjin had snatched the remote and began searching for his show while the rest of the members settled into their cushioned fort. Of course, Minho and Jisung were cuddling together, but they had also decided to pull an unwilling Jeongin into their embrace as well. It looked extremely uncomfortable for the poor maknae to be squished between his hyungs, but he didn’t try to escape, so maybe it wasn’t as bad as Changbin assumed. Meanwhile, Seungmin had gotten cozy with his head in Chan’s lap. The eldest hyung didn’t mind at all, his gaze fond with a soft smile present on his face.

Chan must have felt someone watching them because he glanced upwards, catching Changbin’s eye. The rapper was in a really affectionate mood due to his earlier trauma, and he knew that snuggling up with any of his members would make him feel better. Fortunately for him, Chan seemed to understand his thought process.

“Binnie,” he called quietly. The rapper faced him, eyelids drooping. Chan gestured Changbin closer with a flick of his hand. “Get your ass over here so we can squeeze the life out of you.”

Changbin hesitated for a moment before rolling his eyes in a dramatic fashion  and crawling over to  the two boys , causing  Chan’s grin to grow wider.  Seungmin, who hadn’t paused in snuggling the Aussie’s thigh, merely snorted at the blatant disrespect. Still, they greeted him with open arms once he reached them, and  Chan immediately tugged him into his chest.

With their current position being a little difficult to work with, the three boys readjusted so that Changbin was in the middle with  Seungmin leaning into his chest and Chan  wrapped around his back . They had laid down on the cushions, and the  three of them were tightly packed together , giving  Changbin barely enough room to wiggle his arms  free . Once they  weren’t trapped , however, he settled them  around Seungmin’s torso, keeping the boy as close as possible. The shared body heat left Changbin extremely warm and cozy.

By the time the three boys had finally gotten comfy, Hyunjin had turned the first episode of his drama on. He dropped the remote and  rested his head in Seungmin’s lap , humming contentedly. The vocalist patted his hyung’s hair, not at all bothered by the  tight grip Hyunjin had on his thigh .

The members all let their eyes fall onto the TV screen, and the show’s intro theme filled the room. With that, the marathon began.

Several hours later, the credits on the final episode popped into view. Changbin had to admit, it had been a good show. Some of the more common, and annoying, tropes had made an appearance, but the actors were really talented. Their performances were enough to distract the audience from a couple plot holes and inconsistencies that sprung up from time to time. Changbin wouldn’t have even noticed them had Hyunjin not pointed them out.

In fact, part of the reason the drama was so entertaining was Hyunjin’s running commentary throughout the episodes. He had watched the show in its entirety on a few separate occasions, so he had caught some of the more miniscule details the average viewer often missed. Plus, he had fallen into a rabbit hole back when he first found the drama, researching anything and everything he could about the production and cast. He never seemed to run out of fun facts or behind the scenes stories, which left Changbin wondering where he kept all that trivial information. In other words, he was somewhat of a dedicated fan.

However, the drama---like many others---only had one season. With that completely finished, the group was ready to move on to the next half of their marathon: the Marvel cinematic universe. Changbin knew the superhero franchise was popular among the other members, especially Jeongin. The maknae was ripping himself from MinSung’s grip and leaping towards the remote as soon as the credits appeared on-screen.

Jeongin immediately started his search for Captain America: The First Avenger, insisting they had to watch the movies in chronological order when Jisung asked him to put on Thor: Ragnarok.

“But if we do that then we won’t get to Ragnarok tonight!” Jisung protested, pouting cutely. Minho rubbed his thumbs over Jisung’s eyebrows in an attempt to ease his frown.

“I’ll tell you what, Sungie,” Chan piped up, his voice nearly startling Changbin with its proximity. The rapper was so comfortable that he had almost forgotten who he was cuddled up with. “We can watch the movies Innie wants to watch tonight, but you can choose which one we watch tomorrow night, okay?”

Jisung acted like he was pondering the offer. After a few moments, he relented, nodding as he pressed his face into Minho’s neck.

Chan  smiled , happy that he could help his members come to a compromise once again. He sighed and  readjusted his arms across Changbin’s chest,  his fingers gently drumming a beat onto the rapper’s skin. He  began humming along to the unfamiliar tempo but was interrupted when a shrill ringing filled the room.

It was Chan’s phone. With the eyes of all his members focused on him, he sheepishly pulled it out to check the caller ID.

It must have been someone important because the Aussie native quickly disentangled his body from the cuddle pile and excused himself, leaving the room to take the call. The rest of the boys shared bewildered looks, completely confused by his sudden disappearance.

They didn’t have to wait long for him to return. Chan poked his head back into the pillow fort only a few minutes later.

“I need to borrow Jeonginnie.”

His voice startled Hyunjin, who had nearly fallen asleep on top of Seungmin. As the vocalist did his best to calm the groggy dancer, Chan gestured for Jeongin to follow him.

“What are we doing, Hyung?” the maknae asked as he crawled over piles of pillows towards Chan. He tossed the remote in Changbin’s direction, apparently trusting only his rapper hyung to select the right Marvel movie. Changbin flinched as it landed but grabbed the device anyway and started scrolling.

“Nothing important, just running a quick errand,” the leader responded nonchalantly, holding a hand out for Jeongin to take as he finally exited the pillow fort. Immediately, Seungmin was on high alert, sitting up and staring Chan down.

“You’re going back out? With Innie?”

“Yeah,” Chan confirmed. He seemed to pick up on Seungmin's growing anxiety, sending the vocalist a reassuring smile. “Innie and I are going out to pick up some food for dinner. We don’t have enough ingredients in the kitchen to feed seven boys. We’ll be quick and careful. I promise.”

Seungmin still looked unsure, but Changbin guided him back down onto his chest, hugging him close to keep him in place.

“They’ll be fine,” the rapper mumbled into his shoulder. He was trying to ease his dongsaeng's panic, but he truly believed it too. While their earlier expedition outside the dorm with Hyunjin hadn’t ended well, Changbin had faith that Chan and Jeongin would be more vigilant as they journeyed out. The Aussie native was extremely protective of the maknae, and he would do anything in his power to keep him safe.

Eventually, Seungmin relaxed into his hyung's hold, and Chan dragged the maknae out of the dorms with no further explanation.

The rest of the members resigned themselves to an hour or two or free time, knowing full well that Jeongin would flip his lid if they started the Marvel marathon without him. Changbin clung to Seungmin as he watched the other boys cuddle.

Minho and Jisung were still in their own little corner with the younger boy comfortably perched in his boyfriend’s lap. Minho was humming a soft tune as he ran his hands through Sungie’s hair. The body heat, scalp massage, and Minho’s soothing vocals was a deadly combination, causing Jisung to quickly drift off. All the while, Minho was gazing fondly at his drooling mess of a lover.

Hyunjin and Seungmin weren’t holding back on the PDA either.  The dancer was snuggled up to Seungmin’s thighs as if they were the coziest pillows to ever exist. The rest of his body was curled up into a fetal position, his arms gripping Seungmin’s legs tightly.  The vocalist was resting all of his weight onto his hyung behind him, but his free hand was stroking Hyunjin’s cheeks like they were precious to him .

Minho also seemed to have spotted the dongsaengs’ adorable display of affection. A wide grin made its way onto his face, and Changbin’s stomach dropped once he realized it was one of mischievousness.

“Are you two lovebirds ever going to confirm you’re dating?” he called out, immediately catching the attention of everyone in the room. “I have a bet going with Chan, and I really can’t afford to lose.”

It took a second for the boys in question to realize Minho's words had been directed at them, but once they did, their cheeks blushed a brilliant shade of red. Hyunjin tucked his face into Seungmin’s thighs, although his pink ears still gave him away. Seungmin tried to play off the embarrassment with a snort and a wave of his hand.

Their reactions were so obvious that it forced a chuckle from Changbin’s lips.  Minho’s grin had morphed into something more smug whil e a drowsy Jisung giggled  into his boyfriend’s neck . Changbin knew from first-hand experience that being teased by the members wasn’t pleasant, but it never failed to lift the group’s mood, so he took it in his stride. However, on the rare occasion that  _ he _ wasn’t the victim of the harassment, it was ten times as enjoyable.

“ Oh, don’t you dare try to make fun of us ,” Seungmin suddenly piped up, shooting a glare in  Minho’s direction. “ Didn’t Jisung have to confess to you like five times before you realized it wasn’t a prank? ”

Changbin had half a mind to scold Seungmin for dropping honorifics, but the look on  Minho’s face wiped that thought from his mind real fast.

The  dancer’s eyes had widened in shock,  his ears growing redder by the second . He  spluttered protests , not expecting to have his teasing turned on him so quickly.

Changbin did his best to muffle his giggle, bu t Ji sung had no such qualms.  He laughed loudly, mout h o pen and eyes squinted shut.  The rapper even clutched Minho’s shirt like a lifeline as he struggled to breathe.

“ It’s funny because it’s true!” Jisung wheezed, his smile lighting up his entire face.

At that point, Minho had given up on defending himself. He merely slumped further into the cushions, cuddling Jisung with more force than necessary.

“Hey, don’t be too hard on yourself, Hyung.” Seungmin added, a small grin threatening to break through. “At least you’re not as oblivious as Jeongin with his little texting buddy. Honestly, Yedam could ask the dork to marry him, and our Innie would still think their relationship is completely platonic.”

That caught  Jisung’s attention,  breaking his fit of giggles.

“Yedam? From YG?” he asked, frowning. “They’re still talking?”

Changbin was just as confused as his fellow rapper. He barely remembered  Yedam and only because of his insane vocals. He felt bad, knowing that Jeongin had gotten along great with the other kid. Once they had debuted, they rarely had time to hang out with anyone outside of JYPE. Being an idol was a full time gig, and their everyday schedules grew more and more hectic. If Jeongin had reconnected with Yedam, then their friendship would definitely be constricted to texting and facetiming only.

Hyunjin pulled his face from Seungmin’s thighs, the red slowly fading from his cheeks. His expression was one of genuine confusion.

“You mean you didn't know about Yedammie?”

“No! Didn’t they first meet at the JYP vs YG thing? How are they already so close?” Jisung wondered aloud. He really seemed to be shocked by the fact that Jeongin had a friend outside of Stray Kids, especially one that he didn’t know about.

“I think they exchanged numbers that day and haven’t stopped talking since,” Hyunjin replied, grinning widely. “Jeongin really liked him. They’re super cute together.”

“ Yeah. Honestly,  those two have been dancing around  each other longer than  _ we _ have.” Seungmin scoffed as he gestured between him and Hyunjin. The danc er s queaked in protest and slapped Seungmin’s chest.

Changbin snorted so hard he coughed.  Seungmin just rolled his eyes, rubbing at the sore spot near his shoulder. However, he took pity on Hyunjin and shifted the attention off of their relationship.

“Jeongin always climbs into my bed and whines about how flirty Yedam is. If we’re whipped for Innie, then Innie is completely wrapped around Yedam’s finger. He never shuts up about him.” Seungmin huffed as if he was annoyed just thinking about it, but Changbin could see right through his act. He was probably happy that Jeongin had trusted him enough to complain without judgement---not that any of the other members would ever tease him about something like this. He was also completely supportive of the maknae and his relationship with Yedam.

“I can’t believe he didn’t tell me.” Jisung pouted, his grip on Minho subconsciously tightening. The dancer hugged him back, trying to ease his boyfriend’s disappointment. Changbin could understand why Jisung felt hurt by the realization, though. Did he think they would try to stop him? Did Jeongin not trust them?

“I’m sure he’s just a little shy,” Seungmin spoke, his voice taking a soft tone. Beside him, Hyunjin nodded eagerly. “I know he wanted to tell you guys. I think he really likes Yedam, but he doesn’t want to be teased about it. He probably feels like we’ll baby him. ‘Innie’s first boyfriend!’ or ‘Our baby is all grown up!’ He doesn’t want us to make a big deal about it.”

“I promise I won’t pick on him,” Jisung declared, his frown melting away as he realized that Seungmin was right. The members often made fun of each other, with Jeongin being one of their main targets. The maknae probably didn’t want his daily dose of teasing to increase for any reason. Changbin just wished there was a way to ease Jeongin’s concern.

“If he thought that we would mock his first relationship, then we are doing something wrong,” Changbin pointed out, grimacing as he did so.

“Maybe we should let up on harassing the poor kid a little,” Minho suggested. He looked just as sheepish as Changbin felt.

Beside him, Jisung nodded along. He scanned the rest of the members’ reactions, and his eyes landed on his rapper hyung.

“Maybe we should just stop teasing each other in general,” the younger boy offered. He acted nonchalant, but Changbin had a feeling that Jisung’s proposal was more for his benefit than anything else. Aside from Jeongin, the members really only picked on one other person---Changbin.

The boys all agreed solemnly, their faces grim. It was as if they were suddenly realizing just how aggravating it would feel to be on the receiving end of all their bullying.

While he appreciated the sentiment, Changbin hadn’t wanted the conversation to take such a depressing turn. He bit his lip, trying to think of a way to lighten the mood.

Suddenly, an idea struck him. The rapper scrambled out of the pillow fort as fast as he could, ignoring the questioning looks and calls of his name. He sped towards his room and made a beeline for his nightstand. Finding what he needed almost immediately, Changbin smiled and returned to his members.

None of them had moved, trusting that he would come back, but they all had varying expressions of confusion. Changbin plopped back down on the cushions beside Seungmin and held one hand up triumphantly, his small yet extremely loud bluetooth speaker in hand.

Jisung understood first, his eyes lighting up as an open-mouthed grin spread across his face.

“I call dibs on the first song!”

Changbin snorted, but he tossed his phone towards the younger rapper anyway. As the speaker turned on and connected to his phone, the rest of the members caught on.

“We’re playing DAY6 next,” Seungmin declared, leaving no room for argument. Hyunjin nodded along before claiming that he should choose the third song.

“I’m after Hyunjin.”

“Me next!”

Changbin and Minho turned to face each other, amused by the fact that they spoke at the same time. In the next moment, they both realized what kind of situation they had created.

“ Binnie ,” Minho smirked, his chin lifted high. “I challenge you to a duel.”

“I accept.”  Changbin glared in response.

Hyunjin and Jisung giggled quietly to themselves, entirely too eager to see their hyungs face off.  Seungmin merely rolled his eyes. Apparently,  _ he _ was going to have to be the responsible one while Chan was away, and that meant he would have to break up any fights before they turned fatal.

“That duel is going to have to involve rock, paper, scissors. No barbaric gladiator battles  without Chan hyung .” At  Seungmin’s words,  Hyunjin and Jisung deflated, their fun ruined. Minho and  Changbin scoffed at each other. They were still playing up the whole mortal enemies skit, but  Changbin knew it was all for show . At lea st, it didn’t  _ look _ like  Minho was going to go for  his throat  … anymore .

Jisung, who had been scrolling through Changbin’s music library the entire time, screeched in delight. He wiggled with utter happiness as he played his song, not telling the others what it was.

As the bass of the song, which was obviously some kind of rap song, kicked in, Jisung hopped to his feet and started dancing.

He wasn’t trying to look good, or at least Changbin hoped he wasn’t. He was popping and locking like a malfunctioning robot, leaving the rest of his members in stitches. Minho was too busy watching his boyfriend embarrass himself to pay attention to the rock, paper, scissors game.

Changbin won, unsurprisingly. Minho glared, but there was no heat behind it. He just accepted his defeat and continued laughing at Jisung.

The members spent the rest of their time waiting for their leader and maknae dancing to a variety of tunes. Jisung and Hyunjin started a dance battle with the younger boy doing a move so strange it left Hyunjin writhing on the floor, clutching his stomach as he laughed. Seungmin, of course, played DAY6 every chance he got. He even convinced some of the other members to play his favorite band’s music during their turn with some subtly concealed threats. Minho, ever the sneaky bastard, managed to slip “Wow” into the mix. The members all howled with laughter as Changbin and Jisung clung to each other with not entirely fake humiliation.

Chan and Jeongin burst through the door an hour and a half later, their arms laden with bags. Whatever they were expecting to return to, it most certainly wasn’t Minho and Hyunjin facing off in a Russian squat dance battle to the beat of Twice’s Dance the Night Away.

The two confused boys hardly had the time to give each other a concerned glance before they were engulfed by eager hugs. Changbin watched Jisung latch onto Chan’s torso while Minho and Seungmin practically tackled Jeongin. Hyunjin remained right outside the pillow fort, pitifully massaging his sore thighs.

Changbin noticed Chan’s arms drooping as he struggled to breathe in Jisung's grip. His quick thinking was the only thing that prevented the bags Chan had been holding from hitting the hard wood floor. The rapper brushed off his leader’s grateful smile as he inspected the contents of the bag.

“What exactly did you guys get, Hyung?” he wondered aloud, the blank white containers within the bags doing nothing to quell his curiosity. Almost immediately after he asked, Changbin caught a whiff of the most delectable smell he could possibly imagine.

“Well,” Chan coughed, extracting himself from Jisung’s arms. He stepped beside Changbin, promptly snatching the bag from his unrelenting grip. “That call I got earlier? That was none other than the lovely Mrs. Lee Dasom. She wanted to check up on us after the whole lunch debacle.”

Changbin inwardly winced, just then realizing that the reporters who had hounded them that afternoon would most likely post something about it online. It was probably all over the news at that point.

Chan continued, “Then, just because she’s an amazing person, she offered to cook us up some food so we wouldn’t have to leave the dorms.”

At the mention of food, the rest of the members transformed into ravenous creatures. They lifted their heads, sniffing the air while their pupils blew wide. Slowly, they fixed their predatory gaze on the bags hanging from Chan and Jeongin’s arms. It looked like something straight out of a horror movie. Changbin could see the maknae swallow nervously.

“Oh, stop it you mangy beasts,” Chan snorted, holding the bags high above his head. “You’re not starving. Mrs. Lee slaved over the stove for several hours to produce enough homemade meals to feed seven boys for several days, and I’m not going to let you all tear through half of it in one night. Clear and set the table or else we’re eating ramen---Seungmin’s ramen.”

It was as if Chan had threatened to burn down all their childhood homes with their families still inside. In the next instant, all the members not currently holding a bag of food rushed into the kitchen, pushing each other out of the way in order to get there first. Seungmin hadn’t even protested the subtle dig at his culinary skills.

Jeongin watched the rest of the boys scramble to throw plates down on the table for a moment before turning to Chan with a look of awe in his wide eyes. The Aussie winked.

Changbin could honestly say that Mrs. Lee’s home cooking was some of the best he’s ever had. He hadn’t been able to get home to his own mother for several months due to his hectic schedule as an active idol, and he had missed her warm, filling meals. Mrs. Lee’s food reminded him so much of his own home that it almost hurt. He had begun to notice that Mrs. Lee was eerily similar to his eomma. _God_ he missed her.

The members had dug into their food with vigor at first, but, eventually, they slowed down. The expertly crafted meals were too good to scarf down. They deserved to be savored.

Chan had stuffed the remaining containers of food into the fridge with a stern lecture on how they shouldn’t use them for snacks when Mrs. Lee had worked so hard on them. The rest of the members had agreed readily. The next few days were going to be an extreme test of their willpower.

Approximately two hours later, Changbin found himself trapped under the weight of Jeongin’s body as they snuggled. One of the Marvel movies was playing a few feet in front of them on the television, but Changbin couldn’t remember which one. His focus had drifted in the opening scene several minutes earlier.

Around him and Jeongin, in varying states of drowsiness, laid the rest of the members. Minho and Jisung were piled together on top of Chan. Seungmin and Hyunjin were blatantly ignoring the movie, opting to whisper to each other in their own little corner instead. The fairy lights had been turned off, leaving their twin smiles barely visible.

Changbin felt his own smile grow as he turned back to face the screen. He let his eyes slide shut as an overwhelming feeling of love washed over him. He couldn’t even begin to express just how grateful he was to be in that pillow fort, surrounded by his family.

The warmth of the boy on his chest began to drag him into a peaceful slumber, and he didn’t fight it. He was more comfortable and relaxed than he had been in what felt like years. Only one thing could have completed what he would describe as the perfect night.

Changbin turned his head to the side, his cruel imagination filling the empty spot beside him with a boy whose bright, honest eyes set his heart racing. For once, Changbin didn’t have the strength within him to be mad. Instead, he embraced his fantasy, counting the freckles along Felix’s face until a deep slumber took him away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooooo ... ? Not too bad?  
> I certainly hope so. I've had this chapter almost completely done for several weeks now and I just forced myself to sit down and finish it last night so I didn't have the motivation to reread and edit it (in other words, if there are mistakes, thats my bad)  
> I am also aware that I made a reference to the Two Kids Room episode where Chan and Felix give a slightly misguided tour of the digestive tract of a human (seriously why did he think the spinal cord was in there??) which only made its debut in december but I DONT CARE because I had the opportunity to slip it in and I took it!  
> Anyways, I'm glad the chapter is finally up, and the next chapter is actually already written! (I wrote it ages ago) But it might not be exactly what you expect and I hope you don't hate it because of that. I wont be uploading it super soon because I want to give myself time to start the chapter AFTER it but it definitely won't be as long of a wait as this was.  
> IM SORRY about the long notes but its been awhile! Take care of yourselves ... or else.
> 
> Also Side Note: I'm not sure how many of you are Marvel fans, but either way you've probably heard about the tragic passing of Chadwick Boseman. I'm a huge Marvel nerd, and I love all of the actors/actresses equally. Chadwick was a stand-up guy and he was incredibly charitable. He was a good man, and he will be missed by millions of people. Rest in Power Chadwick Boseman


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Doctor sets his plan to test a theory into action.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hellooooo!!!  
> It's been less than 24 hours and I'm BACK (but this time with an actual chapter instead of a late night rant/update on how this fic will work!) I am excited and nervous to post this chapter because it's kind of a step back from SKZ as a whole and I don't want to disappoint you guys by not including Felix in this but once you read it hopefully you can understand how that wouldn't really work  
> Also, this chapter physically hurt me to write/reread because of the angst. I do have a little disclaimer in the end notes so if you would check that out pls and thank you :)  
> Thank you for reading!!!

Johnny felt an incessant tapping on his shoulder. He grumbled, waving it off and curling further into himself. At least, he tried to. He quickly realized that he was being held back by something strapped across his torso. The tapping didn’t cease, and Johnny’s temper was quick to flare when he was tired.

“Fucking stop!” he gritted out, eyes finally opening so he could level a heated glare on the heathen that cut his nap short. Jaehyun met his gaze head on, unflinching. He lifted a perfectly sculpted eyebrow.

“You know, I could’ve just left you in the car, but I’m sure Taeyong hyung would have my ass. C’mon, get up. We’re at the studio.” The man unbuckled his seatbelt, slipped a ball cap over his hair, and exited the vehicle, leaving Johnny to rub the sleep from his eyes.

Eventually, the taller boy managed to pull himself up and out of the car. Jaehyun was waiting patiently, and the two entered the SM building together.

They had just finished one of their last shows as the joint hosts of NCT Night Night. They were both incredibly sad that the radio show had to come to an end, but it was hard not to be excited for their upcoming tour. Currently, it was late in the evening, and they had expected most, if not all, of their other members to be back at the dorms, getting some desperately needed sleep. They had been surprised to receive a text from Taeyong, suggesting that they visit the studio after they were done. He claimed that he had ordered too much ramyeon for the twelve other members to finish on their own. Of course, Jaehyun and Johnny weren’t going to pass up free food, almost tripping each other in their haste to get to the car.

Now, the two boys were making their way to the main dance studio in which they practiced. Recently, they hadn’t spent much time in that room, way too busy with the promotions for their latest album. It was exhausting, driving from interview to interview, then performing showcases and concerts with barely any kind of a break in between. It was extremely stressful, and Johnny had noticed that some of the other members were feeling the brunt of it.

Those that usually greeted him with a warm smile or hug every morning, Taeil and Jungwoo, now barely lifted their heads to acknowledge him. A few members would snap at each other over little things, and Taeyong or Johnny would have to step in before it became a full on argument. The young ones quickly learned that pranks and teasing weren’t received well, earning themselves many long, angry lectures. The sour mood of their hyungs caused them to go into hiding on particularly taxing days.

Johnny tried to be helpful and understanding, especially if someone spoke too rough or brushed him off like he was an annoying insect in their ear. However, it was getting increasingly difficult as the days turned into weeks and breaks from the madness were few and far in between. The tension and stress were building, and if things continued as they were, something somewhere would have to give. Johnny just hoped that the force of it didn’t wash them away.

Jaehyun entered the studio first, his tired eyes lighting up at the sight of multiple ramyeon containers scattered across the floor. Johnny was right on his heels, eager to get his hands on those delectable sodium noodles. Although, the thought of stuffing their faces with food was swiftly kicked aside once they were in the room.

The majority of the members were all gathered together in the corner of the room, their eyes fixated on the situation unfolding about ten feet away. The tension was so thick, one could cut it with a knife.

Yuta was scowling deeply, looking as if he would rather be anywhere else. Taeyong was standing in front of him, hand on his hip and finger pointed towards the other’s chest. He was chewing him out for something, his voice the only thing audible in the otherwise silent room.

“You need to pause and actually think about what you’re saying. Your words hold much more power than you give them credit for. You can’t just fucking insult someone and call it ‘constructive criticism.’ You can really hurt someone that way, Yuta!” the leader huffed, eyes hard. Johnny was already on edge. It wasn’t often that Taeyong got this mad, especially at one of the members.

“And you need to learn how to stop being such a fucking wimp, _Hyung_ ,” Yuta sneered, emphasizing the honorific and spitting it out like it was poison on his tongue. “If I see a mistake, I point it out, and I tell them to correct it. If I don’t, then someone else will, and, trust me, they’ll be twenty times worse. Sometimes, the only thing that can get their head out of their ass is the harsh truth. It’s not pleasant, but it works. I’m not going to just let the entire group look like amateurs because one member can’t tell his left from his right.”

Taeyong clenched his jaw, taking two intimidating steps closer to the Japanese man. His accusing finger was now pressed against Yuta’s chest. Their faces were centimeters apart. “Despite popular belief, you are not a _god_ , Yuta. You are not perfect, and there’s no fucking way you know everything you claim to. You need to learn when to back off and when to push. Sometimes you have to be tough in order to properly teach someone, but most of the time, patience is shockingly effective. Humiliation should never be used as a teaching technique, so don’t use it in this studio, especially not with your own family.”

Yuta looked ready to throw a punch, judging by the tight fists he held at his sides. Johnny decided that maybe they needed a mediator, someone that can step in the middle and help them work it out.

The Chicago native crossed the room and gently placed a hand on both Taeyong and Yuta’s chests. As he began guiding them away from each other, he tried to make his tone soothing. “How about you both just take a breather. You guys are extremely worked up, and you need to try to calm down before you say something you’ll regret.”

Yuta sniffed, holding his ground for a few agonizing moments. Then, his shoulders dropped just slightly, and he took a step back. Jungwoo, the sweetheart, was instantly at his side, murmuring quiet words in his ear.

Taeyong, usually one of the more level headed members, brushed Johnny’s hand off of him like it burned. His eyes were still raging with anger. Unfortunately, he chose Johnny as his next target to take it all out on.

“Oh, great!” he grinned, sickeningly sweet. “The beanstalk showed up. Maybe we can all hold hands and sit down in a circle together while you share with us all your _amazing_ stories from Chicago!” The sarcasm bled into his voice, and Johnny knew he wasn’t the only one in the room that was shocked into silence. Their leader always tried his best to keep his temper in check, so it was incredibly unexpected when he lashed out. His cheerful act dropped quickly, and his face turned to stone. “You realize we don’t give a shit, right? You’re not the only one that left your friends and family behind, so stop acting like it. Get your act together. You’re a fucking mess.”

Johnny knew Taeyong was just trying to get a rise out of him, the stress causing him to look for a fight during which he could release his pent up aggression. He would only be falling for their leader’s trap if he responded. So, he shoved the anger expanding in his chest down, took a deep breath, and kept his voice level.

“You don’t mean that. You’re not thinking clearly, Taeyong. I think it’d be best if you get yourself some space. Maybe go on a walk or dance in the studio across the hall? We all just need to calm down.”

This only seemed to spur him on.

“You would like that, huh? You just want me out of the room so you guys can gossip about how much of a failure I am. Well, you know what, Johnny? I’m not the fucking screw up in this band. No, no. That’s all _you._ ”

Johnny felt himself freeze.

He knew he wasn’t the only idol to struggle with self-esteem and self-confidence issues, but he just wasn’t as strong as the others. He usually managed to hide it all behind loud laughter and obnoxious jokes. Behind closed doors, though, he depended highly on the love and care he received from his members to get through an entire day. Sometimes, he could barely get himself out of his bed in the morning, and when he did, he came face to face with his reflection, looking back at him with disgust.

_You’re fucking useless._

_You’re trash._

_You can’t dance._

_No one wants you._

_The fans hate you._

_Your family hates you._

_Your members hate you._

_Hell, even_ you _hate you._

He heard his own sneering voice every minute of every day. When he was with his members, he could ignore it. When he was on stage, the crowd and music drowned it out. When he was alone … 

Eventually, Johnny knew he needed to talk to someone about his insecurities. He needed to vent, and he needed someone to listen. So, he went to his best friend: the boy he could empathize with, the boy he could hang around for hours and never get bored, the boy that he trusted with his darkest secrets. Ten was always understanding, always supportive. When he left to join the rest of WayV in China, Johnny felt like he lost a piece of himself. Some of the toughest days he had ever experienced followed, and Johnny knew he wasn’t strong enough to deal with it all alone.

Taeyong stepped in, filling the void Ten had left. He could see through Johnny’s fake smiles. He could talk Johnny out of his own thoughts, bringing him back to earth. He was there when it all became too much. One could say that a leader is expected to support his members, but Taeyong was more than just a leader. He was a friend, a confidante, a member of the family. Johnny looked up to him as a brother---someone he could share every secret and insecurity with.

And now, his brother was throwing it all back into his face.

“You shouldn’t even be here! You barely get any lines because no one wants to hear you, you stay at the back of the group because you dance like an ape, you barely get by on visuals, and your humor makes the rest of the members want to vomit. You’re so fucking annoying, Johnny! You try too hard to be the good guy, and it makes me feel like a piece of shit. I’m not a piece of shit! _You’re_ the piece of shit! You’re not wanted here, so---so just _fucking leave!_ ”

The room was quiet. No one moved, no one blinked, no one breathed.

Johnny’s face betrayed nothing, because he felt nothing.

His mind and body were numb.

Beside him, Taeyong had gone still as well. Maybe he finally noticed the numerous pairs of eyes on his back, or maybe his brain caught up to his mouth. Whatever the case, Johnny heard his breath hitch and physically felt the horror radiate off of him.

“John---Johnny? I …”

He was probably going to apologize, but Johnny didn’t want that. He didn’t want to hear an apology because he knew that Taeyong wouldn’t have said those things if … if he didn’t mean them deep down. Any kind of apology would be wrong because he shouldn’t be sorry. He spoke the truth.

And sometimes the truth hurts.

Johnny turned and was out the door, headed towards the front entrance of the building before anyone could move.

He just needed to be alone for a while. He needed time to think and time to reflect.

Unsurprisingly, the voice he was so familiar with hearing started growing louder. Only this time, he didn’t hear himself. It was Taeyong’s voice, hate barely hidden behind those sickeningly sweet words. He tried so hard to ignore the deprecating insults, but they fed directly into his unspoken fears. Taeyong was joined by Ten’s voice, both screaming that he was a failure, a fuck-up, a mistake.

Johnny’s mind was so full of hateful thoughts that he felt light-headed. He let his legs carry him away from the studio, no particular destination set. His eyes never left the ground under his feet because he was too afraid of looking up to see Taeyong, his face twisted in disgust.

Eventually, Johnny found himself trudging through the paths of some type of park. He didn’t recognize any of his surroundings, meaning that he was quite a ways from the studio or the dorms. His head was still swimming, but the fresh air and the serene silence that usually accompanied nightfall made it easier for the Chicago native to calm down. Breathing deeply, he pulled his phone out of his pocket and risked a glance at the screen.

There were three missed calls with five texts from Jaehyun, one missed call with two texts from Mark, and fourteen missed calls with eleven texts from Taeyong. Johnny bit his lip and unlocked his phone. He contemplated sending some kind of message to Jaehyun, just to reassure him that he was okay, but he didn’t want to lie. He wasn’t okay, not in the slightest. Plus, he didn’t want his friend to hear the way his voice would inevitably shake when he spoke. 

Suddenly, the dark screen lit up. The phone buzzed as a notification appeared, informing Johnny that Jaehyun was calling him. After a moment of hesitation, the idol sighed and answered.

“Johnny?” Jaehyun gasped immediately, the concern obvious in his tone.

“Hey,” the boy croaked. He knew he sounded bad, almost as if he had been crying, but he could tell that the sound of his voice brought a great amount of relief to his friend. “I’m sorry.”

The idol on the other side of the call shushed him quickly. “Johnny you have absolutely nothing to apologize for. You needed some time to yourself, and that’s okay. We were just getting a little worried.”

Johnny nodded to himself.

_They’re just pretending to care about you. Can’t you see how much you annoy them?_

“Are you going to head back to the studio soon? We can keep a car waiting for you, if you want.” Jaehyun spoke softly, almost as if he was trying to calm a scared animal.

_He knows how pathetic you are._

“I-I’ll just call an Uber or something,” Johnny mumbled. He lifted his head to study his surroundings. There were a couple trees, a cute little bench, and a pretty cool-looking fountain off in the distance, but no distinctive features that helped the idol identify which park he had wandered into. “I’m not really sure where I am right now. I think I’d just get lost trying to find my way back.”

“Okay, well text me when your ride shows up. I want to know that you’re safe, okay?” The concern in his voice was palpable. Jaehyun sounded similar to Johnny’s mom when he was late getting home, and it made him smile a bit.

_He just doesn’t want to be held responsible if you get hurt. He couldn’t care less about you._

The smile disappeared.

“Okay. Bye.” Johnny ended the call immediately, not giving his friend the chance to say anything else. He was too tired for long, drawn out farewells.

As soon as he lowered his phone from his ear, Johnny felt something hit the back of his hand hard, sending the device flying out of his grip. It landed with a crack in the middle of the street, and the idol knew in his gut that it was completely shattered. The anger rose in his chest as he turned to face the asshole that ruined his phone, but he never got the chance to see who it was.

Before he could process all that was happening, Johnny had been tackled to the ground. His head hit the gravel, and the impact sent his mind spinning. He felt someone straddle his stomach, trapping his hands at his sides and forcing the air out of his lungs. At the same time, someone else held his legs down with their entire body. The guy on his stomach covered his mouth and grabbed his jaw with rough hands, forcing his head to the side.

Johnny tried to blink the dizziness away, but his brain was all muddled. He realized he was being attacked for some reason and began struggling. He wiggled his body as much as he could and attempted to rip his legs from his attacker’s grip. His strength slowly returned to him, and he struggled harder.

“Hurry the fuck up! I’m gonna get kicked in the face!” A gruff voice warned from down by Johnny’s feet. As soon as the words left the man’s mouth, Johnny managed to get a leg loose and landed a kick to the guy’s chest. He wheezed out a couple curses.

Suddenly, there was a prickling feeling in the side of Johnny’s exposed neck. He shouted, but it was muffled by the hand on his mouth. The hands on his body remained in place, no matter how hard he fought.

A new voice cooed at him, sounding as if it came from right above his face, “Night night, big boy.”

After only a couple of minutes, Johnny felt his eyelids droop and his muscles turn to jelly. His frantic movements died down until he could only manage halfhearted jerks of his arms and legs. Whatever they had injected him with worked incredibly fast, and the Chicago native realized he couldn’t fight it for very much longer.

As his eyes slid shut and he fell into a deep sleep, Johnny couldn’t help but think that this had to be the shittiest night of his entire life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ...yeahh  
> DISCLAIMER: Obviously I don't actually think any of the things Taeyong/Johnny said are in any way true (I made up the insults but I really didn't like writing them)  
> Originally, Ten was going to be the person that said all the hateful things/got really heated but I did some quick research and found out he was most likely training in China with WayV at the time so obviously that wouldn't work  
> Also I know its unlikely all the members are practicing together in one studio but who cares about the finer details 'amirite??  
> I hope you guys enjoyed the chapter despite the lack of Felix (I promise he'll be in the update after next)  
> I am taking a slight hiatus for a few weeks/months to rewrite the current chapters but I'll be back soon enough!!!  
> Thank you so much for reading and take care of yourselves!!! <3<3<3


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The first search parties for Felix begin. The volunteers learn some disturbing news.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Long time no see!!!  
> I disappeared for quite a while this time, but at least I had an excuse (editing all of my previous chapters + finishing this chapter). Also the holidays were kind of hectic and schoolwork was getting out of hand. But all of that doesn't matter anymore because I'm BACK WITH ANOTHER UPDATE  
> I think this chapter isn't half bad so hopefully you guys enjoy! Thanks for reading (and for sticking around despite my horrible procrastination).

The muted hum of the car’s engine was almost enough to drag Changbin back into his dreams. His eyelids felt like they weighed hundreds of pounds, and he struggled to keep them open. The only reason he wasn’t currently snoring up against the window was because, no matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t get his mind off the day ahead.

At that moment, the members of Stray Kids were being driven to the location of a traffic camera at the edge of the city. It was the last place where the van that had taken Felix had been spotted. That was where they decided to begin their search.

Beside him, Changbin was greeted by Jisung’s light snores. He knew none of the other members had managed to get a good night’s sleep the evening before, anxiety and anticipation threatening to engulf them whole. He was surprised Jisung was the only one that had passed out during the forty minute drive. Jeongin was scrolling through his phone in the seat behind Changbin, the light illuminating his face in the darkness of the early morning. Seungmin was curled up next to the maknae with his earbuds snug in his ears. The vocalist was most likely blasting some DAY6 song to calm his nerves.

Changbin could relate. His palms would grow clammy, and his mouth would go dry every time he thought of the upcoming search. On one hand, the rapper was excited to get out of the dorms so he could actually  _ do _ something to help find his dongsaeng. He had been feeling extremely useless as of late, and joining the search party was a nice break from that mindset. However, the deep rooted fear that they wouldn’t find anything or—even worse—they would find something terrible evoked a raw sense of anxiety in the members. This event left them all with a bittersweet feeling of relief.

Changbin resigned himself to staring out the window, watching smaller cars and trees pass by for the remaining twenty minutes of the drive. He did his best to focus on the multicolored leaves still stubbornly sticking to the bare branches, knowing that letting his mind wander in his current state would do him no good. Eventually, his tactic worked, and the autumn trees gave way to a large gathering of people as the car pulled into a clearing.

As their Manager hyung parked, Changbin nudged Jisung awake. The boy groggily slapped his hand away, but his eyes were open. Behind them, Jeongin poked Seungmin’s cheek before unbuckling their seatbelts and preparing to leave the vehicle.

Changbin was the first one out, and he glared up at the sky. It was slowly beginning to grow brighter as the sun peeked out over the trees, giving them just enough light to see with. Changbin moved aside as the other members tumbled out. He left them to adjust to their new surroundings, opting to rejoin Chan’s half of the group who were exiting the second vehicle.

“Did’ya get any sleep?” He asked once he was sure Chan could hear him. His voice was deeper and rougher than usual, but he still hadn’t shaken the drowsiness from when he had dragged himself out of bed that morning. He just hoped it would wear off before they all started hiking through the dense woods.

Chan helped Hyunjin out of the car before turning to acknowledge Changbin’s question with a raised eyebrow. Changbin knew it was dumb to ask  _ Chan _ of all members if he had managed to sleep, but he didn’t appreciate the Aussie’s sass. It was way too early for that.

“Never mind. I forgot you’re a vampire,” the rapper huffed, waving a hand half heartedly.

That brought a chuckle out of the leader, a small smile visible as he shook his head in disbelief.

“If I was a vampire, I would’ve killed all of you in a fit of bloodthirsty rage by now.” Chan crossed his arms, his attention divided between his conversation with Changbin and counting his half-asleep members.

“Not all of us,” Changbin sniffed, jerking his chin towards an oblivious Jeongin. The youngest member was struggling to remove himself from a drowsy Hyunjin’s incredibly strong grip, a scowl on his face. Chan followed his line of sight, a fond smile overtaking his features as soon as he caught the rapper’s drift.

“Yeah,” he mumbled, shoving Changbin towards the rest of the members. “I could never hurt my sweet, sweet Innie.” Changbin let himself be forcibly moved, but he pouted at Chan’s response. Of course, he knew they were all whipped for their maknae, but Chan could’ve at least  _ pretended _ to disagree.

“Are we ready?” Minho asked through a yawn, his hand loosely intertwined with Jisung’s as the boy practically clung to the dancer’s arm. Their leader ruffled Changbin’s already mussed up locks as he nodded.

With that, the members all made their way towards the mass of people gathered in the middle of the grassy clearing.

The anxiety reared its head within Changbin as his mind so helpfully reminded him of the incident with the reporters. A week had passed since then, but as the members trudged forward, Changbin couldn’t help but recognize the parallels between then and now. Only this time, the group of people was ten times larger than the mass of press—there were easily upwards of a hundred people milling about in the clearing.

Changbin must not have been hiding his unease very well because Jisung slipped his free hand into the older rapper’s, squeezing gently. Like magic, his breathing slowed and his pulse calmed, Changbin unsure of when they had started going haywire. He shot Jisung a quick smile, unable to pull him aside and wrap him in a firm hug like he really wanted to. Jisung seemed to understand, though, as he returned his grin and rubbed his thumb along Changbin’s knuckles.

The members approached the gathering, and a quick scan of the crowd confirmed Changbin’s suspicions. Most of the people present were young women—most likely all Stays. They were conversing amongst themselves, but as the members came closer, the constant chattering increased. It wasn’t quite deafening like the audiences at their concerts could be, but Changbin could tell they were excited that Stray Kids had finally arrived.

The boys walked along the edge of the crowd, occasionally waving at the Stays and thanking them for coming. Eventually, they made it to the front of the gathering, finally able to see the makeshift meeting area Mrs. Lee and JYP had set up beforehand.

There was a long portable table positioned in front of the large crowd with only one chair sitting next to it. There was nothing on the table, but a smaller group of people was milling behind it, separated from the other volunteers. Changbin realized he recognized the people near the table after a few years of passing them in the JYP building hallways.

The entirety of GOT7, DAY6, and Twice were all standing together in the middle of the clearing, socializing with each other and waiting for the search to begin. JYP was also there, having a private conversation with GOT7 and Twice’s managers a few feet away. Mrs. Lee was holding hands with her husband as she spoke to Youngjae and Sungjin, her two daughters intently listening at her side.

For a short moment, Changbin was shocked by the sheer amount of idols willing to spend their precious spare time out in the woods, trudging through the brush. In the seconds following, the rapper felt the urge to slap himself in the face. Of course the other JYP artists would want to help out—they’ve expressed their intent to do just that multiple times over the past few weeks. Idols under JYP always said their company was like a large, chaotic family, and they weren’t lying. Changbin had to blink away a few tears, but there was no way he could stop the giant smile quickly spreading from ear to ear.

It seemed the rest of his members shared the same sentiment, their faces lighting up as they took in the sight of their fellow JYP artists preparing to look for their lost brother. Seungmin was a little star struck when he noticed DAY6 within the crowd, and Hyunjin not-so-subtly stared at Jinyoung. Changbin would be embarrassed by the two if he didn’t love them so fucking much.

Chan led his members towards the table at a quicker pace. Mrs. Lee, the most observant woman ever, noticed them approaching and waved in greeting. She broke away from the group to wrap Chan in a comforting hug, drawing the attention of all the JYP artists. As Chan filled Felix’s mother in on how the past week had treated them, the rest of the members were swarmed by the other idols.

Changbin saw Wonpil and Dowoon head straight for Seungmin while Jaebum and Jinyoung joined Hyunjin. Jisung skipped over to where BamBam and Yugyeom were laughing about something stupid, dragging Minho along with him. Jeongin was whisked away by Jihyo and Jeongyeon, the three of them disappearing into the crowd as nearly all of the remaining Twice members gravitated towards them. The poor maknae was a stuttering mess while they fawned over his smile.

Meanwhile, Changbin found himself face to face with Jackson Wang, Jae Park, and Kim Dahyun. He immediately bowed, offering a soft spoken yet respectful greeting. He had previously met Jackson a couple of times, but he had little to no experience with the other two, their schedules rarely intersecting. He had heard that Jae liked to tease younger artists, but Dahyun was known as an extremely friendly person. Changbin could only hope they wouldn’t judge him too harshly if his nerves got the better of him.

“Hey, hey. No need for that, Bin.” Jackson interrupted Changbin’s bow, gently grabbing his arm and pulling him upright. He was pouting when Changbin rose to face him. “It makes me feel old.”

Beside him, Jae nodded solemnly, his glasses sliding down his nose. Changbin thought it made him look like a disapproving elder, and the irony was not lost on him.

“Bin, you’re one of the most badass rappers under JYP. My ego needs you to treat me like your cooler hyung, okay?” Jackson laid a hand on his chest, speaking to Changbin with wide, honest eyes. “Don’t give me all that respect crap. If you do, I’m going to have to assume that you hate me.”

"Yeah,” Jae piped up, shooting Jackson a smirk. “Jackson here is incredibly insecure. He needs constant reassurance or else he’ll curl into a little ball and cry the rest of the day.”

The man in question let exasperation overcome his features, still not releasing his hold on Changbin. He shot Jae a glare.

“This is why I don’t call you Hyung. You’re so  _ mean _ to me!”

Jae huffed a laugh, landing a few firm pats on Jackson’s slumped shoulder. “You’re so easy to mess with, though!” Changbin, who had just been watching their interaction with barely hidden amusement, failed to stop a chuckle from escaping. Jae heard it, cocking his head in the rapper’s direction. “You tease your dongsaengs, right?”

Suddenly, the attention was once again on Changbin. He froze, unsure of what to say. Of course, he definitely  _ tried _ to mess with the younger members, but they usually turned it all back on him. The Stray Kids maknae line was not one to be played with.

Luckily, Dahyun stepped in when she noticed him floundering. She scoffed at the two older idols’ dramatic display, rolling her eyes. When she turned to Changbin to guide him out of Jackson’s grasp, she sent a quick wink his way. Then, as if it hadn’t even happened, she tucked him closer to her and leveled a glare at Jackson and Jae.

“You two are the worst influences on these guys. You know that, right?”

Jackson reacted as if Dahyun’s words physically stung him, gasping and clutching at his heart. Jae merely snorted, making no move to deny the accusation. Instead, he held a spluttering Jackson back as Dahyun led Changbin away. The rapper didn’t resist, instead choosing to send the strange hyungs a sheepish wave goodbye. Meanwhile, Dahyun headed further into the crowd of idols, and Changbin followed.

“I’m sorry about them,” she said, rolling her eyes again. She acted incredibly exasperated, but Changbin could see the corners of her lips threatening to lift into a smile.

“It’s okay,” the rapper reassured. Dahyun glanced back at him, finally realizing she was still dragging the boy by his wrist. She let go. “I’ve dealt with worse.”

Dahyun chuckled at that, turning to face him. “Yeah, I’m sure. Your members love to tease you, don’t they?”

Changbin nodded earnestly. He didn’t mind it though. He could take all the pranks and jokes as long as they made his dongsaengs—and hyungs—laugh.

“Sorry for yanking you around like that. I wanted to get you out of there before those two  _ really _ got going. Plus, I wanted you to meet one of the other idols that volunteered. He’s really cute.”

Changbin felt his heart stutter in his chest. Did she know …?

No. Chan wouldn’t have said anything. Hell, he hadn’t even told Jisungie. Why would he tell Dahyun?

“He’s young too—younger than I.N.,” Dahyun continued, oblivious to the inner turmoil Changbin was struggling with. “Now that I think about it, you might’ve met him at the whole YG vs JYP thing during your show. He’s adorable, black hair, big nose… Like a Mini Chan almost.”

Suddenly, the breath Changbin hadn’t known he was holding escaped from his lungs. He subconsciously rubbed at his chest, his heart pounding against it.

“Yedam?”

Dahyun’s face lit up. She nodded enthusiastically.

“Yes! That was it! Bang Yedam! It was at the tip of my tongue. He introduced himself and everything, but my brain is a mess most of the time. It all went in one ear and out the other. Did you know he managed to convince his company to let him come today? They sent him with a manager, but I’m just shocked he’s here. Are any of you close with him?” Dahyun tilted her head in question, eyes wide and locked on the rapper in front of her.

“Yeah,” Changbin chuckled, thinking back to the pillow fort conversation with Seungmin and Jisung a week prior. Jeongin was going to turn tomato red when he saw the younger boy. “Jeonginnie has been texting him a lot. They’re good friends. He probably asked Yedam to come.”

Dahyun’s gaze drifted to a spot above Changbin’s shoulder, eyebrows raising. She pointed as she giggled. “Apparently not. Look.”

Changbin frowned but turned anyway. All he saw was most of the other Stray Kids members behind him, gathered into a lopsided circle. They had been discussing something, but now they were all struggling to hide their smiles. When Changbin followed their stares, he understood why.

Yedam was a bit taller than the rapper remembered, but nothing else had changed. His hair was still pitch black, and his smile was the same. Although, Changbin had never seen such a  _ bright _ smile on the boy before. It was currently directed at a stammering, flustered mess of a kid called Jeongin.

Jeongin was obviously gobsmacked that Yedam was standing in front of him. His shoulders were tense, and his ears were a radiant red.

“W-What are you … What are you  _ doing _ here … ?” Their maknae questioned, sounding breathless. Changbin guessed his heart was beating a mile a minute. Off to the side, a majority of the Twice girls were giggling amongst themselves as they watched the interaction.

Yedam’s smile dimmed a bit. He shrugged, suddenly sheepish.

“You’ve been so busy lately. I didn’t want to bother you by texting, but I still wanted to help out if I could. I figured this was a good start.” Yedam swung his arms in a wide circle, gesturing at the grassy clearing and the hundreds of people gathered in it. “I can leave if you want, but I—.”

“No!” Jeongin practically shouted. The idols in his immediate vicinity hid their smiles, but not well enough. Jeongin’s face blushed darker. “No, you don’t have to leave. I was just a little … surprised?”

Yedam straightened as if, by not rejecting his attempt to help out, Jeongin had completely renewed his confidence. His grin returned, and he stepped closer.

“You sure?” He asked.

“Y-Yeah,” Jeongin replied, his hands shakily wiping at his legs. Changbin winced. The poor boy’s nerves were making him sweat before they even started searching. “I’m sure.”

The two vocalists just stared at each other, both too shy to make a move.

After a moment, Jeongin cleared his throat.

“Thank you for coming.”

The pink tint of his face had started fading, and his voice was much steadier. It sounded genuine, the smile accompanying it enough to make Changbin coo at the cuteness.

Now  _ Yedam _ was the one to look embarrassed, his tongue darting out to swipe over his lips. “Of course.”

Changbin noticed Chan biting his fist in the corner of his eye, no doubt struggling to keep his squeal from escaping. The rapper was impressed when he managed to stay silent even as Jeongin and Yedam shared a quick yet comforting hug.

“Okay!” Mrs. Lee interrupted the moment, her voice amplified by the megaphone in her hand. Around her, several idols startled from the sudden sound. BamBam even muttered a curse as he hugged himself, his eyes scrunched shut. Changbin had no idea where Felix’s mom got the megaphone, but he knew better than to question it—especially when she started barking orders.

“I’ll be dividing you into six groups. You will be given an area to search and a map to navigate. Two people from each group will carry a radio. Is that clear?”

As a few idols nodded, several more shouted in agreement. Mrs. Lee smiled and brought the megaphone to her lips.

“Group One! Jaebum, Youngjae, Jihyo, and Brian.” As she announced their names, the idols stepped forward to form a line. YoungK trudged over to his group with a barely concealed scowl.

“Looks like Jae got to Mrs. Lee,” Dahyun observed with a chuckle. Changbin snorted, recalling all those interviews and videos where Jae refused to call YoungK by his stage name.

As they approached her, Felix’s mother lowered her megaphone to tell them, “My husband is over by the table. He will give you the radios and maps.” They nodded and trotted over to the long table where Mrs. Lee’s husband and daughters were waiting.

Mrs. Lee turned back to the crowd of idols.

“Group Two! Momo, Hyunjin, Wonpil, Yugyeom, and Dahyun.”

Dahyun perked up, hearing her name. She smiled at Changbin and shot him finger guns.

“Looks like I’m out of here. Good luck!”

Changbin waved as she left. He found it hard not to immediately like the girl’s strange personality, and he was somewhat disappointed she wasn’t in his group. She was fun to hang out with.

Dahyun’s group headed towards the table, and the quirky girl already had her arm intertwined with Hyunjin’s, chatting his ear off as they went. Changbin chuckled, knowing full well those two would get along.

“Group Three!” Mrs. Lee spoke, pulling Changbin’s attention back to her. “Mina, Jackson, Mark, Jeongyeon, and Dowoon.”

Changbin breathed a sigh of relief. At least Jackson wouldn’t be clinging onto him the rest of the day. He saw the energetic rapper throw himself at his band mate, Mark, who merely rolled his eyes and carried on, a full grown man attached to his back. Changbin empathized with the guy despite only meeting him a handful of times. However, Mark had several years of experience with Jackson, so he was less likely to get overwhelmed. Changbin couldn’t say the same.

“Group Four! Jinyoung, Minho, Nayeon, Tzuyu, and Changbin.”

The rapper inwardly shrugged. He didn’t really know Nayeon or Tzuyu very well, but at least he had Minho. His hyung could be annoying, but without Jisung by his side, he would be bearable. He had also met Jinyoung a handful of times backstage and throughout the JYP building. The vocalist struck Changbin as a kind guy, so he had no qualms about being in a group with him. 

As he neared where the line was forming, Nayeon greeted Changbin with a sweet smile. He waved in return while Minho came up behind him.

“So I’m with you. How  _ wonderful _ .”

Changbin snorted, shooting Minho an unamused look.

“Yeah, yeah. We get it. I’m not your  _ Sungie _ . Sorry to burst your love struck bubble there, Hyung.”

Minho scoffed and, like any mature young man, stuck his tongue out at the rapper. Nayeon giggled into her hand. Jinyoung and Tzuyu joined them not long after, and the group headed towards the table.

Less than ten minutes later, all the groups had been formed and given their assignments. Everyone had gathered near the table, quiet conversation flowing between the group members as they made introductions and discussed their search locations. The chatter quickly died down once Mama Lee climbed onto one of the chairs with her megaphone.

“First of all,” she started, her voice amplified enough that even the volunteers at the very back of the clearing could hear. “I want to sincerely thank each and every one of you for taking the time out of your day to help look for my son.”

Applause rang out from somewhere near Changbin, and everyone else was quick to join in. Mrs. Lee placed a hand on her heart, eyes slightly misty. It was obvious just how much it meant to her to see so many people dedicated to finding Felix. Changbin scanned the gigantic crowd, and his smile grew. They hadn’t expected such a large turn out and listening as close to a hundred volunteers cheered for his missing sunshine warmed his heart. He would be lying if he said his eyes weren’t a little misty.

“Thank you, thank you,” Mrs. Lee sniffled. She was grinning widely but raised a hand anyway, signaling for the applause to die down. It was as if she controlled the crowd. The noise faded almost instantly. “Once again, thank you. I speak for my family and Felix’s members when I say, ‘We are incredibly grateful.’”

Standing directly underneath her was Chan and Mr. Lee, both of them nodding in agreement.

The speech continued, “We are all gathered here today to accomplish a shared goal of finding my son. He was taken from us against his will, and we want to bring him home where he will be safe once again. The vehicle used in his kidnapping was last spotted not even twenty meters from where we are standing. While the detectives handle the investigation, we are tasked with scouring every inch of these woods for clues that could help them locate Felix and the men who stole him from us. The time and energy you are sacrificing today will bring us one step closer to accomplishing our goal. Thank you, from the bottom of our hearts, for being here and know that  _ you _ are the reason our family will be reunited once again.”

The applause that followed Mama Lee’s declaration was deafening, reminding Changbin of the packed audiences at their concerts. Shouts of love, support, and determination filled the clearing. The rapper smiled from ear to ear, clapping so hard that his palms were stinging, but he couldn’t care less. Mrs. Lee was one hell of a speaker, and her dedication towards finding her son inspired everyone around her to match her passion.

The woman in question stepped off of her chair as the crowd roared. Changbin didn’t see a single person without a cheek-splitting grin. Everyone was on their feet, hollering and cheering, eager to begin the search.

Chan’s team—including Seungmin, Yedam, Jeongin, BamBam, and twenty or so of the gathered volunteers—were first to head out. They had the area furthest away, so they had the longest walk. After them was Group Three, led by Mark, and then Group Two, led by Dahyun and Hyunjin. Each group took a chunk of the remaining volunteers as they left.

Eventually, the surge in energy died down a little and what remained of the crowd slipped back into conversation. Changbin’s group loitered near the table, waiting for Mrs. Lee to send them off. Beside them, Sungjin looked frazzled, unable to do anything but watch as Jae and Jisung got along like two peas in a pod. They threw horrible jokes back and forth in an effort to make each other laugh while making subtle digs. Chaeyoung and Sana tried to distance themselves, but Sungjin sent them a pleading look and they returned, the two of them way too nice to abandon the poor man with those heathens.

Jinyoung broke away from the group long enough to give Sungjin a pat on the back, his expression pitying. Unfortunately, he had plenty of experience with overbearing and  _ loud _ members playing off each other to create even more chaos.

Finally, Mrs. Lee called for Changbin’s group to head out. He glanced over his shoulder to see Jisung and Jae playing an intense game of rock, paper, scissors. Shaking his head and praying to any deity to help Sungjin through the next few hours, Changbin faced forward and trekked into the forest.

The walk was surprisingly pleasant. The sun, which was slowly rising higher into the sky, peeked through the trees and bathed the ground in a warm glow. Small birds fluttered from branch to branch, chirping at each other in greeting. The forest floor wasn’t a sloppy, muddy mess despite recent rainfall in the area. It was a peaceful morning.

All in all, Changbin definitely wasn’t complaining. The fresh air was even helping to clear his head and lift his mood.

He took his eyes off the twisting roots underneath his feet to scan the trees to his right. The twenty or so volunteers his group had collected before heading to their assigned search area were spread out, about fifteen meters separating each of them. It was a more efficient tactic when looking for a missing person because it allowed nearly every inch of the forest to be searched at the same time. The distance between volunteers helped the group leaders keep everyone within view, but, without the walkie talkie, they would have to shout in order to be heard.

It had been a solid hour of walking in comfortable silence when their group leader, Jinyoung, finally decided to check up on Changbin. Unfortunately, the rapper was so focused on finding any abnormalities along the forest floor that he didn’t hear his sunbaenim approach.

“You doing okay?”

“What the--?!” Changbin jumped away from the sudden voice in his ear, just barely stopping a curse from slipping out. Jinyoung seemed surprised by the reaction, not realizing that the younger boy hadn’t been paying attention.

“Woah,” he chuckled, hands up in a placating gesture. “Didn’t mean to scare you. Sorry about that.”

Changbin had clapped his palm over his mouth immediately after his little outburst, knowing full well that all of the volunteers could hear his embarrassing shriek. Aside from a few bewildered glances, nobody made a big deal of the situation, and Changbin felt himself relax.

He removed his hand and waved off Jinyoung’s apology, expression sheepish.

“No, no.  _ I’m _ sorry. I was up in my own head … didn’t hear you coming,” he explained. Jinyoung nodded in understanding.

“I get it. This whole situation is extremely difficult for everyone involved---especially you.”

The vocalist spoke matter of factly, and Changbin couldn’t help the confused tilt of his head. Jinyoung must’ve noticed.

“Ah, you know,” he chuckled, somewhat nervously. “You and Felix being together and all that. It has to be incredibly hard for you to deal with all of this.”

Changbin frowned as his brain struggled to comprehend what his sunbaenim was talking about. The longer the silence stretched on for, the more unsure Jinyoung looked.

“You two are dating, right?”

It felt as if someone had sucker punched Changbin directly in the chest. All of the air left his lungs in a woosh, and he panicked.

“W-What?!” he responded brilliantly. “No! No, Felix and I aren’t---we’re not---what gave you that idea?!”

Jinyoung pursed his lips, appearing pensive. He rubbed the back of his neck. “I’ve seen you two around the JYP building a few times, and you always looked like a couple. You held hands, you let him wrap around you like a koala, you brought him food, and you even kissed his head a few times when he was asleep. Plus, with Minho and Jisung being a thing, we all just assumed you guys had gotten together as well.”

“We’re not together,” Changbin insisted, his eyes wide and slightly wild. Jinyoung nodded quickly, attempting to soothe the younger idol’s panicked protests. “We’re just really close. It’s not like that, I promise.”

“I believe you.” Jinyoung laid a hand on Changbin’s shoulder, squeezing gently. He offered a kind smile which would have helped the rapper relax had he not fully processed Jinyoung’s admission.

“Wait, you said ‘we’,” Changbin recalled. He felt the hand on his shoulder tighten. “Who else thinks we’re a couple?”

Jinyoung tried to play it cool with a nonchalant shrug, but his smile suddenly looked forced, and he wouldn’t meet Changbin’s eyes.

“Oh, not that many people. Just me, Jaebum, Jackson, BamBam … the rest of GOT7 … everyone in Twice … everyone in Day6 … a few of our stylists---.”

“What?! Why?” Changbin spluttered. At first, he hadn’t been too worried, but then Jinyoung just kept listing people, his voice getting quieter and quieter until the rapper couldn’t stand it anymore. “Why does everyone think we’re dating?”

Jinyoung lifted a brow. “To be fair, you guys don’t really act like close friends. It may have started out like that, but, recently, you’ve been acting like a couple that’s been together for years. The way you two comfort and care for each other … the way you can communicate without speaking. It’s hard to take that as anything other than romantic love. Sorry for assuming, but you made it very hard  _ not _ to assume, you know?”

His answer left Changbin speechless. Do they really behave that much like a couple? The rapper had never been as close to his previous friends as he was with Felix, but he hadn’t found that too strange. They lived together, worked together, and spent every waking moment together. It was almost impossible not to be extremely close.

“But you and Jaebum---,” Changbin started, eager to prove that one could be close with a friend and still maintain a platonic relationship. He was interrupted by the radio clipped to Jinyoung’s belt suddenly coming to life. Both boys glanced down as a staticky voice came through.

“Group Four? Hello?”

Jinyoung hastily unclipped the device and held it to his mouth, eyebrows furrowed. “Yes, we’re here. Is something wrong?”

They waited for a response, the breath caught in their throats. This could be it. They might’ve found something. Changbin knew it was foolish to expect the first search party to result in anything other than muddy shoes and aching muscles, but he couldn’t fight the hope blooming in his chest.

“The search has been cut short. Head back to the starting point.” Silence filled the air as the idols waited for the caller to explain.

When nothing happened, Jinyoung prodded. “Did we find something?”

The radio crackled once again.

“Unfortunately not. You’ll get more information as soon as everyone is accounted for.”

Changbin felt the short lived hope die, his expression falling and shoulders slumping. He should’ve known. Someone probably got lost and has to be tracked down, delaying the entire search.

Apparently, Jinyoung was not satisfied with that answer.

“What happened? Why are we stopping?” He asked. “My group can keep going. We’ve still got plenty of ground to cover.”

Changbin watched the radio warily. There was a heavy silence that followed Jinyoung’s questions as the caller weighed their options. Obviously, they had been warned not to tell the groups what was going on or else they would’ve just explained from the beginning. The more Changbin thought about it, the more suspicious he got. What could they possibly be trying to hide from everyone?

Fortunately, his answer came quicker than he expected.

The familiar static came through, both of the boys perking up instantly at the sound.

“Reports are coming in that another kidnapping with the same M.O. happened late last night. Same van, same masked men, same drugging tactic … Only this time, a couple witnesses across the street interrupted, and the kidnappers left without their victim.”

Jinyoung was shocked, his eyes going wide and his fingers trembling from where they gripped the radio. If Changbin hadn’t been struggling to stay upright, he would’ve tried to offer some comfort. Instead, he was willing his limbs to regain feeling so he didn’t collapse.

The kidnappers struck again? Why? Why would they need another victim when they just grabbed Felix a few weeks prior? Worst-case scenarios ran rampant through Changbin’s mind, and he focused on blocking them out. This case was different. They didn’t successfully take someone away this time. They failed, and that meant they were getting sloppy. They left behind a victim who could possibly identify their attackers, bringing them one step closer to finding and rescuing Felix. Maybe this was a good thing.

“The victim … The victim wasn’t just a random stranger, though,” the caller admitted, catching the attention of both of the shell shocked idols. A sense of unease settled across them.

The blood rushing past Changbin’s ears almost blocked out the caller’s next words.

“It was another idol … they tried to kidnap Johnny Seo.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So the good news is that Johnny didn't get kidnapped!!! The bad news is that Felix is still missing and his friends and family are still super sad...  
> I have to admit, it was really fun writing Jackson and Jae together. I hardly see them interact irl so I had to guess what would happen (also I'm still shocked Jae is older than Jackson). Dahyun is also amazing and she was the only twice member I thought I could maybe write well considering I barely know any of them or their personalities. Hopefully it wasn't too bad!  
> Once again, I'm sorry this chapter took so long and I basically disappeared without a trace. I'm going to try to be more proactive about updating but I really can't promise anything.  
> Happy holidays to you all and Happy New Year!!! Good riddance 2020!!! Thank you for reading! <3<3<3


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aftermath of Johnny's failed kidnapping. Felix experiences Hess's wrath firsthand.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey Y'all! I'm back Bitches!  
> It's been two months, I'm a bastard, this chapter isn't all that exciting, we get the jist  
> But, I'm excited to be back in the swing of things (kind of, maybe) and I'm happy to be writing again! While this chapter isn't that exciting, the next one will be full of crossovers and mostly fluff, so I hope you likey!  
> WARNING: There is a point in this chapter where a "panic attack" occurs (I'm not comfortable calling it a panic attack 100% because I've never had one so I have no idea if my depiction is correct, but I thought I would leave a warning just in case). If you want to skip it, you should stop reading around "Felix knew was probably extremely pale..." and begin reading again at "Suddenly, his panic was pushed to the back of his mind..."  
> Thank you for reading!!!

A loud thud startled Felix awake. He lifted his head to glance around, the emptiness of the two cells across from him barely registering in his mind. Rose and Kyuho had left before Felix had even fallen asleep. He doubted they would’ve been back by now.

The Aussie native had settled down for a short nap not too long before, his patience waning thin as he waited for  _ anything _ to happen aside from the scheduled meals and his daily exercises. Felix hadn’t left his cell in five days, and the lack of activity was slowly getting to him. There was nothing to do, nowhere to go, nothing to see.

Well, apart from his wings.

The new appendages were slowly growing on him, both literally and metaphorically. All of the wrinkled pink skin was completely covered by feather shafts sporting flimsy fluff that hadn’t yet taken the shape of rigid feathers. Felix didn’t know what the process of growing bird wings involved, but he took a wild guess that the feathers would reach their final stage in a few days. The Aussie was excited to have fully formed bird wings. The weight and feel of them on his back was getting just slightly heavier every day, but it wasn’t uncomfortable. In fact, it was becoming more and more familiar as time passed, and, soon, Felix wouldn’t be able to remember how he lived without them.

Just as the idol was about to lay his head down to catch a few more Z’s, another thud rang out from the end of the hallway, where the large set of double doors stood. He perked up, trying in vain to take a peek. Was someone fighting back? It rarely happened because most of the prisoners under Dr. Hess’s care had given up on escaping long ago, but, occasionally, one of the patients would reach a breaking point and shit hit the fan.

The idea was pushed from his mind almost as soon as it sprang up. The more likely option was that a relatively clumsy employee had dropped something, or, much worse, Dr. Hess had a new test subject. There hadn’t been any new additions to the crazy scientist’s collection since Felix, but Rose and Kyuho had explained that it was always obvious when there was one. Sometimes the poor victim fought with everything they had after waking up in a strange place, but the most common way they could tell was the screaming of a person experiencing hell on earth in the form of purple liquid.

Felix was kept from wondering for too long by Yunkwan appearing between the double doors. As the doors opened, they allowed a distant voice to filter through. It sounded plenty angry, the rage palpable, and the voice rough from yelling. It was promptly muted by the doors slamming shut once again.

Yunkwan made his way towards Felix, face just as blank as ever, but the Aussie barely noticed. The voice had sounded familiar, and it made him incredibly uneasy to hear it so furious. For some reason, he knew he would do anything to make sure that he didn’t become the subject of that rage.

Eventually, Yunkwan reached his cell. He stood in front of the control panel that would open the gate and crossed his arms, waiting.

After a second, Felix realized what he expected him to do. Sighing, the idol reached under his bed, fingers wrapping around the cold metal of his collar. He snapped it shut over his throat without a moment’s hesitation. He had previously thought about trying to fake putting the collar on or attempting to disable it before wearing it, but Rose and Kyuho had derailed that trait of thought fairly quickly. They said it was impossible to do without Dr. Hess knowing because of the numerous hidden cameras scattered throughout the hallway and each individual cell. One of the other patients had already learned that lesson a year or two prior, receiving agonizing electric shocks and a severe beating as punishment. He was no longer at the facility, and Felix hadn’t asked why.

So, Felix secured the collar and watched Yunkwan open his cell. The buff man gestured for the idol to walk out in front of him, and he complied. He had been itching to leave his cell, even if it was only for a few measly hours of tests. He was starting to look forward to the moment Dr. Hess determined him ready for training sessions, as depressing as that sounded. He wanted to join Kyuho as soon as possible. Who knows? Maybe he would even enjoy it.

Yunkwan grabbed his arm firmly and began leading the idol down the hallway. With every step closer to the set of doors, the shouting was becoming more and more audible. Felix tensed as they neared the exit. He did not want to be forced into a room with whoever was in that bad of a mood.

Despite his hesitation, Yunkwan forced Felix through the doors and towards the exam room he remembered from before. The voice was now obnoxiously loud, and the words were clear as day. They seemed to be drifting towards the idol and his handler, originating from a slightly ajar door down the hall that led to what looked like an office. A chill ran down Felix’s spine.

“One simple thing, I asked of you. ONE SIMPLE THING! And you  _ still _ managed to screw it up! Unbelievable.”

Felix swallowed the lump in his throat. The pissed off voice belonged to none other than Dr. Hess himself. The Aussie hadn’t recognized it at first because he had never heard the man in so much rage, and he now knew that he never wanted to hear him sound like that ever again. The thought of having the man that determined whether he lived or died so furious at him made his blood run cold.

“He was completely alone, unattended, vulnerable, and you still couldn’t muster enough intelligence to drug him and throw him in a van. How is that possible? My fucking  _ grandmother _ could’ve completed that job better than you!”

Luckily for Felix, Yunkwan had no intentions of interrupting the vicious scolding Dr. Hess was in the middle of. He steered the idol into the exam room and gestured towards the table. Felix complied silently, and Yunkwan moved to close the door. Before he could, however, one final snippet of the argument in the office reached the Aussie’s ears.

“Not only did I  _ not _ get my promised idol, but now the whole fucking country is on edge. You nearly exposed my entire life’s work, Yehun. I cannot let that stand---.”

Felix froze, and the door clicked shut. Yunkwan leaned against the wall nearby, unperturbed, his face just as blank as ever.

Did he hear that right? Did Hess really try to kidnap  _ another _ idol? It shouldn’t have been that much of a surprise, considering the man had ranted about his theory regarding k-pop artists last time Felix had been out for testing. But, Felix still struggled to wrap his mind around it. Someone else had almost had their freedom stolen from them. Another family had nearly been left in unthinkable sorrow and pain. Dr. Hess had almost succeeded in ruining yet another innocent person’s life.

Felix’s thoughts began to spiral, and the poor boy couldn’t do anything to stop them. He saw flashes of popular idols he had spoken to once or twice being grabbed from behind with a needle pointed towards their necks, friends that he had made before and after debut being shoved into a dark van, mouths and wrists bound tightly, his members strapped to metal tables … their screams going unanswered as purple liquid crept through the IV and into their body.

His treacherous imagination was only interrupted by the door Yunkwan had just shut flinging open. Yunkwan stood straight, waiting for instruction. Felix could only stare in horror as the form of an incredibly angry Dr. Hess loomed in the doorway.

“Yunkwan,” the doc demanded, his voice rough from all the yelling. “Give me the controller. I can handle Felix alone. I need you to assist Jiseok in escorting Yehun out of the building.”

The blank-faced man nodded once, handed a small rectangular device to the doctor, and slipped out of the room. Dr. Hess tucked the device into his pocket and began pulling supplies for the exam out of the cabinets. He glanced at the tense form of Felix sitting on the table for a fleeting moment before ignoring him completely and turning towards his assistant. As always, Minhee was right by his side.

“File.”

The woman detached a yellow folder from her clipboard and passed it to her boss. He flipped it open, scanning the contents.

“Go prepare for the x-ray. We’ll be there momentarily,” the sandy-haired man ordered, his eyes never leaving the papers. Minhee nodded and quickly scooted away.

If Felix thought that listening to Dr. Hess shouting was terrifying, he had no idea what it felt like to be trapped in a room alone with him in a bad mood. The air around them was so thick, one could cut it with a knife. Damn, Felix wished he had a knife.

Despite the tension coming off him in waves, the doctor didn’t snap or lash out at the Aussie. Felix was practically holding his breath, absolutely convinced that any sudden movement would set him off, but the doc didn’t seem to notice. He took his patient’s vitals, recorded the results in his file, and replaced all of his equipment without uttering a single word.

Felix was still cautious, but he wasn’t absolutely terrified anymore. As long as he didn’t do anything stupid, he could perhaps finish all the tests without incident. As humiliating as the thought was, he had to try to be on his best behavior, for his own good.

For an hour or two, his plan worked.

Dr. Hess and Felix had met up with Minhee in the x-ray room, only a few words exchanged between the assistant and her boss. They set up and took the x-rays, the process being just as uncomfortable as Felix remembered. The silence followed them as they traveled across the hallway into the MRI room, and it was only interrupted by the whirring of the large machine and the classical music drifting through Felix’s headphones.

After they were finished, Felix was led back to the beginning exam room, where a saliva and blood sample was to be taken. To begin, they had him spit into a tube which proved difficult as his mouth had gone dry the moment Hess had made eye contact with him for the first time that day. Eventually, they were satisfied with the sample, and Hess started preparing to collect a syringe full of blood.

Felix watched the doctor clean his arm with the alcohol wipe. His mind was worryingly quiet, and his vision was slowly becoming unfocused. He didn’t understand it. He had gotten his blood drawn multiple times before, with Dr. Hess doing exactly that less than a week prior. He was used to it. But, that didn’t stop his heart from pounding against his chest as the sandy-haired doctor pulled the plastic cover off the needle.

Felix knew was probably extremely pale, and he suddenly felt lightheaded. The doctor approached him, needle outstretched, in slow motion. The man grew closer and closer, and, with every step, Felix shrunk back further. He curled into himself, wings subconsciously wrapping around his body.

It didn’t make sense, but Felix couldn’t think clearly with the warning signs flashing through his brain. His breathing stuttered. He gripped his stomach and tucked his knees close to his chest. He rested his forehead against them.

He blinked. His vision didn’t clear. His breaths were short, quick. The oxygen wasn’t reaching his brain. Was he suffocating? He couldn’t feel his hands, but his arms were trembling.  _ What is happening? What’s wrong with him? _

He couldn’t think.

… couldn’t feel.

… couldn’t  _ breathe _ .

Suddenly, his panic was pushed to the back of his mind, replaced with something quite familiar to him: pain.

It was blindingly hot, surrounding his neck and forcing whatever air he had in his lungs out. It burned, and the boy clawed at his throat, desperate to get rid of it. The pain did not cease, and Felix heard a wrecked sound escape his mouth, tears streaming down his face. His muscles convulsed, slamming his head back against the wall.

Just as quickly as it came, the pain left.

The room was deathly silent save for Felix’s wild gasps of air. He was slumped against the wall behind the table, the cool surface relieving the heat from the surface of his skin. His forehead was damp with sweat, and his body was suddenly exhausted.

“--lix.  _ Felix. _ ”

The voice was too close for comfort, and Felix shrank back from it. His eyes strained to see the source without turning his head. He didn’t think he could move if he tried.

Dr. Hess was leaning towards him, cold glare settled on the Aussie’s trembling body. His arms were crossed, and the needle was, fortunately, nowhere to be found. However, the rectangular device Yunkwan had handed over earlier was gripped tightly in the doctor’s fist, his thumb lightly resting on a large silver button. If Felix’s mind hadn’t been so muddled, he would’ve been more suspicious of it.

“Felix. Answer me,” the doc demanded. “Can you hear me? Can you speak?”

“Y-Yeah,” the boy replied, wincing at how rough his voice sounded. He must’ve been screaming. “I can hear you.”

Dr. Hess let out a sigh, the frustration in his expression melting away to reveal disappointment. He rubbed one hand over his face and took a step back. Felix felt his shoulders relax as more and more distance was put between them.

Dr. Hess dipped his head down to whisper something in Minhee’s ear, the woman showing no emotion as he did so. She nodded an affirmative once he stood straight again and retreated to a far corner of the room. She pulled a radio from the waistband of her pencil skirt, holding it close to her lips as she spoke quietly. Her gaze was focused on the wall in front of her.

Meanwhile, the doctor moved to start putting his supplies away. He grabbed the unused syringe and needle from the counter, the sight of it sending Felix’s heart rate through the roof again, and separated the two components. The syringe was thrown in the trash, and the wasted needle was dropped into an orange container hung from the wall. Dr. Hess didn’t spare Felix a second glance, but he watched Minhee speak into her radio until she met his eye and nodded.

Then, it was a tense five minutes of waiting. Dr. Hess and Minhee were standing close together, heads bowed. They were discussing something on Minhee’s clipboard, but Felix couldn’t bring himself to care much. The last time his body had felt so weak and useless was when Chan and Changbin had forced him to join their high intensity workout one day, and, of course, right after the purple serum had burned him from the inside out.

The next few minutes were a blur for the Aussie. He remembered Yunkwan entering the room with a wheelchair and speaking with the doc. Felix felt himself being lifted into the wheelchair and guided out of the room. He barely lifted his head as they traversed the hallway, passing the three double doors of death and entering the one in the middle. There were a few people watching him be rolled down the aisle from behind their barred gates, but, for the most part, Felix’s cell block was empty. Rose and Kyuho still weren’t back from their training which was disappointing. He wanted to forget the day he had, and the only way to do that was talk to his new companions. Everything else failed to keep his attention.

Yunkwan spoke to the voice through the comms and pushed Felix into the cell when the door opened. He unceremoniously dropped the boy onto his bed, taking the wheelchair with him as he left. The gate locked into place, trapping Felix once again.

Usually, Felix experienced a frustrating thing when his body was tired, but his mind wouldn’t shut up. It often kept him awake at night, and he never got the rest he needed. However, today had been stressful, to say the least, and Felix knew he would have no trouble falling asleep.

So, the Aussie resorted himself to spending the rest of the afternoon in bed with the covers pulled up to his ears and his wimpy wings tucked around him.

As he laid down, waiting for sleep to find him, his mind replayed what Dr. Hess had been shouting earlier. The man had ordered his team to find a new idol, but they had failed. Something went wrong: the idol fought back, the team made a mistake, or a witness interrupted them. Whatever it was, it had completely foiled their plan to forcibly take another innocent person from their friends and family. Felix couldn’t stop the drowsy smile from spreading across his face.

The doctor had fucked up. Now, everyone knew Dr. Hess was out there. They knew that he was willing to kidnap high profile artists, and they would be on high alert. There would be safety protocols, increased police presence, higher security …

As awful as it was, Felix had to admit that Dr. Hess sending his team after that idol, whoever they were, was one of the best things that could’ve happened. He had made a mistake, and now it was going to cost him.

The Aussie native was finally able to relax for the first time that entire day, a dopey grin present as he drifted to sleep, dreaming of screeching car tires and police sirens.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So that was a wild ride!  
> If it wasn't very clear, the pain that Felix felt was from the metal collar. It was the first time Hess used it on him, so he didn't know exactly what it was. I'll probably explain it a bit more in the chapter after next.  
> Did you like it?? I don't hate the writing, but the chapter itself was a little uneventful. Accordian to my outline, this chapter is one of the more boring ones and most of the next few are exciting!  
> I hope you guys are staying safe and taking care of yourselves! (Hydrate, Hydrate, Hydrate PEOPLE!) And I'm it means a lot that some of you have stuck through my awful updating schedule. Thank you, seriously.  
> Thank you for reading, and I'll see you all in another two three months! Haha jk (unless...?)
> 
> <3

**Author's Note:**

> I have been working on this secretly for months lol  
> I started this fic back in 2018, so obviously its very outdated. Skz have had many more comebacks since then but it was a hassle to change everything so the timeline is the same as it was when it started. If you can jump back to November when I Am You was released, you’re in good shape.  
> I will definitely not update regularly, because i am a disaster human. I will try my best not to completely abandon this work tho  
> I hope you guys like it!!! :)
> 
> Ps: I love reading comments


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